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ADHD reWired

ADHD reWired

Written by: Eric Tivers LCSW ADHD-CCSP
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ADHD reWired is more than just a podcast, we are a community for ADHD Adults. This podcast brings you stories, strategies, and science from everyday people and the world's top experts. Host Eric Tivers, LCSW, ADHD-CCSP is a trained mental health professional who not only specializes in ADHD but also has it. Eric talks openly about his own ADHD as well has his recent autism diagnosis. If you're ADHD or AuDHD and you want to feel less alone, hit subscribe for a regular dose of "me too."©Tivers Clinical Specialties, PC Dba ADHD reWired, (2025) Hygiene & Healthy Living Psychology Psychology & Mental Health
Episodes
  • The Desire Gap: ADHD, Sex, and Mismatched Libido with Laura Jurgens EP 563

    The Desire Gap: ADHD, Sex, and Mismatched Libido with Laura Jurgens EP 563
    May 5 2026
    Episode topic: ADHD, sex, desire discrepancy, intimacy, communication, kink, queerness, polyamory, and what happens when libido doesn't match in relationships. Content note: This episode includes candid adult conversation about sex, desire, libido, kink, dating apps, polyamory, and sexual communication. Episode Summary What happens when one partner wants sex more than the other? What if ADHD affects libido in both directions? And what if "just do it" is actually some of the worst advice out there? In this episode, Eric is joined by Laura Jurgens, a dual-certified master relationship and intimacy coach, desire and arousal specialist, and host of The Desire Gap podcast. Laura helps individuals and couples create more authentic sexual connection, including when one or both partners are neurodivergent. Eric and Laura get into a candid, shame-free conversation about ADHD, sex, mismatched libido, desire discrepancies, rejection sensitivity, sensory needs, communication, and why so many people struggle to talk openly about what they actually want. Laura explains why desire differences are incredibly common in long-term relationships, why obligation sex can create resentment and shut down libido, and how ADHD can shape both high and low desire. She also shares how people can begin reconnecting with their bodies, practicing self-attunement, and communicating more clearly with partners. The conversation also explores sex positivity, kink positivity, queer dating, bisexuality, polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, and the importance of honest, embodied consent. This episode is frank, playful, personal, and deeply human. In This Episode, You'll Hear About Why desire discrepancy is common in long-term relationshipsHow ADHD can contribute to both high libido and low libidoWhy "just do it" is terrible advice for mismatched desireThe difference between sex for connection and sex for nervous system regulationHow obligation sex can lead to resentment, shutdown, pain, or sexual dysfunctionWhy a partner can start to feel like a "tool" or "medication" when sex becomes self-regulationThe role of dopamine, novelty, and hyperfocus in ADHD sexualityWhy some ADHDers struggle to get out of their heads and into their bodiesHow stress, burnout, and nervous system activation can shut down libidoWhy self-attunement is a key starting point for intimacyHow alexithymia can complicate emotional and sexual communicationWhat "sex positive" and "kink positive" can actually meanWhy embodied consent matters more than intellectual "I guess this is fine" consentHow kink communities can model explicit communication and negotiationThe risks of opening a relationship when the relationship is already disconnectedWhy polyamory requires a high level of trust, communication, and self-awareness Dating while bisexual, queer, neurodivergent, or exploring new relational identitiesHow to disclose needs and patterns without using ADHD as a "get out of jail free" cardWhy communicating about withdrawal, burnout, and alone time matters in relationships Notable Moments / Quote Pulls "Obligation sex is the worst possible advice." "If you are trying to manage your partner's feelings with your body, that is a one-way ticket to resentment town." "Sex can become the way an ADHDer gets into their body and out of their head." "Your partner starts feeling like a tool or a medication rather than a person you authentically want to connect with." "Compatibility doesn't mean there are no differences. It means there are differences you can navigate." "Do I love the sex I'm having? That's a question a lot of people aren't even asking themselves." "Practice with the kitten to play with the tiger." "Don't yuck on someone else's yum." "You don't have to be evangelically polyamorous." Guest Bio Laura Jurgens is a dual-certified master relationship and intimacy coach and host of The Desire Gap podcast. She is a desire and arousal specialist who helps individuals and couples discover authentic sexual connection, including when one or both partners are neurodivergent. Her approach helps people release shame, shed relationship anxiety, and build confidence through more effective communication. Her work is play-based, practical, inclusive, trauma-informed, and grounded in current research. Laura is a former university professor with a PhD in biological sciences, with certifications from the Somatica Institute, The Life Coach School, and the NeuroAffective Touch Institute. Learn more about Laura at laurajurgens.com and listen to The Desire Gap podcast. Resources & Links Learn more about Laura Jurgens: laurajurgens.com Listen to Laura's podcast: The Desire Gap Learn more about ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups: coachingrewired.com Learn more about ADHD reWired: adhdrewired.com Join Adult Study Hall, our virtual coworking community: adultstudyhall.com Support the show on Patreon: patreon.com/adhdrewired Sponsor / Program Mention Registration is open for the next season of ...
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    1 hr
  • ADHD reWired Live Q and A April 2026 ep 562

    ADHD reWired Live Q and A April 2026 ep 562
    Apr 20 2026

    In this live Q&A episode, Eric Tivers and ADHD reWired coaches Brian Entler and Kristin Marts answer listener questions about the overlap between ADHD and autism (AuDHD), and how to better understand your brain through both coaching and therapy.

    They explore how coaching and therapy serve different—but complementary—roles, especially when it comes to turning insight into action. You'll hear practical examples of how to use each space effectively, whether you're job searching, working through burnout, or trying to follow through on what matters.

    Eric also breaks down the concept of monotropism—a lesser-known but powerful way to understand autistic attention—and how it differs from ADHD hyperfocus.

    Later in the episode, the conversation turns to late autism diagnosis, self-identification, and the emotional impact of finally understanding yourself through a new lens. Eric shares openly about his own diagnosis and how it's shaped his relationships, self-compassion, and recovery from burnout.

    They also tackle questions about:

    • Why autism is often diagnosed earlier than ADHD in children
    • How to advocate for your child when concerns are dismissed
    • Auditory processing challenges and sensory sensitivity
    • The growing conversation around self-diagnosis

    This is a wide-ranging, honest, and deeply validating conversation about what it means to better understand how your brain works—and what to do with that understanding.

    KEY TAKEAWAYS
    • Coaching helps with execution and follow-through, while therapy focuses on emotional processing
    • Monotropism explains long-term, topic-based focus often seen in autistic individuals
    • Late autism diagnosis can lead to increased self-compassion and clarity
    • Self-diagnosis can be valid when grounded in thoughtful research and reflection
    • Sensory and auditory processing challenges are often context- and stress-dependent
    • Advocacy is essential when concerns about children are dismissed
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    1 hr and 7 mins
  • Coaching Groups: Final Registration Events This Week (A Short Song)

    Coaching Groups: Final Registration Events This Week (A Short Song)
    Feb 10 2026

    Pre-registration for the ADHD reWired Coaching Groups is due Thursday.
    Registration events are happening Thursday and Friday.
    The next group starts next week.

    👉 For exact dates, times, and next steps, go to:
    https://www.coachingrewired.com

    This episode includes a short, experimental song made with Suno Ai explaining the coaching groups.
    If you're listening after the registration window closes, future groups will be announced on the website.
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    2 mins
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