In this twelfth episode of our Five Questions series, a Kenyan man in the diaspora reflects on masculinity through the lenses of leadership, emotional growth, family responsibility, and self-understanding. Raised in a female-dominated household without a father figure, he explains how masculinity for him became rooted in the ability to lead, provide, and protect — not only financially, but emotionally, physically, and spiritually. The conversation explores how marriage counselling challenged inherited ideas about masculinity, helping him become more aware of his emotions, communication, and relationships. He discusses tensions between traditional African expectations of men and more contemporary understandings of vulnerability, affection, and emotional openness. Grounded in personal experience, this episode reflects on masculinity beyond money, status, or physical strength, arguing instead for self-awareness, emotional maturity, and responsibility.

In the eleventh episode of our Five Questions series, a South African woman reflects on masculinity through the lens of upbringing, balance, and changing social expectations. She traces her understanding back to a traditional household, where clearly defined roles often masked unequal realities, particularly for women managing both domestic and economic responsibilities. From this, she challenges the idea of “50/50,” arguing that true balance depends on how roles are lived, not how they are described.

Drawing on her experience of moving from the Vaal region to Johannesburg, she highlights the contrast between community-based traditions and the demands of urban life, in which both men and women navigate shifting expectations. She also explores how inherited beliefs, shaped by history and survival, continue to influence how masculinity and femininity are expressed today.

Her reflections raise direct questions about responsibility, balance, and the need for self-awareness, while closing with a clear message: strength without control and care is not masculinity, but harm.

In this tenth episode of our Five Questions series, a Kenyan man reflects on masculinity through the lens of identity, cultural exposure, and lived experience. He defines masculinity as being comfortable with one’s role, principles, and responsibilities as a man, shaped over time through both personal upbringing and observations across different African contexts. Drawing on experiences in countries such as Botswana and Zambia, he challenges assumptions about traditional male roles, particularly around work, responsibility, and social behaviour.

The conversation explores how masculinity is evolving, with particular attention to the perceived tension between traditional expectations and contemporary societal shifts. He reflects on how changing narratives—especially in relation to gender discourse—have influenced men's understanding of their place within families and communities, sometimes creating uncertainty about responsibility and leadership.

Family remains central throughout the discussion. The Kenyan man highlights the role of fathers in shaping male identity, emphasising the importance of presence, shared activities, and consistent guidance. He contrasts this with modern parenting dynamics, where shifting roles can reduce direct male influence in a boy’s development. Across cultural contexts, he also notes patterns of male-led decision-making within families, while acknowledging the role of consultation and collective input.

Grounded in lived experience, this episode frames masculinity not as performative or loud, but as something expressed through small, consistent actions—particularly in leadership, responsibility, and everyday conduct.