In reflecting on motherhood, I have noticed recurring themes including guilt, selfishness, feeling trapped, loss of identity, the importance of choice, and the exhaustion it brings. Social media often fuels these feelings by portraying idealised stay at home mothers with perfect homes and appearances, suggesting that this is the pinnacle of happiness. In contrast, others share the raw reality of messy hair, fatigue, and perseverance, reminding us that motherhood is not about perfection but persistence.

I no longer judge these differing narratives because people live according to their own beliefs, and fear often keeps them from making authentic choices. My own journey as a mother of three sons has been complex, filled with joy, criticism, and labels ranging from good to selfish mother. I have learned that such opinions reflect others’ biases and insecurities, not my worth.

From age sixteen, I resolved not to live for others’ approval, instead focusing on my strengths, education, and financial independence. When I met my husband at eighteen, we initially agreed on shared responsibilities and no children, but he later changed his mind. We committed to realistic expectations, emotional support, and quality childcare, enabling me to return to work after each child’s first year. Despite societal pressures, I pursued my career and personal growth, ensuring my children understood the reasons behind these decisions.

Motherhood is a vital part of my identity but does not define me entirely. I embrace my humanity, acknowledging mistakes, seeking forgiveness, and striving to improve. I believe traditional gender roles should give way to teamwork, with husbands sharing emotional, physical, and financial responsibilities.

Women must reject guilt and social comparison, focusing instead on strengths, authenticity, and God’s guidance. Motherhood should complement life, not consume it. True fulfilment comes from living authentically, maintaining balance, and recognising worth through divine love, not through societal approval.

To a lot of people, especially in Australia, apples are a very common fruit. It is even given away for kids to snack on at major supermarkets and there is a saying that “an apple a day, keep the doctors away”. It is a saying that implies that something easily attainable can help maintain our health. I haven’t always had this experience with apples. To me it means more than just a piece of fruit. To me it was a lifestyle that is a stark contrast to the one I have now. So here is my apple origin story. It started with a quarter of an apple.

“I am not in this world alone; you make up chapters in my story.”

In the 90s, a real estate agent named Kieran became an unexpected hero in my family’s life. At 15, alongside my 11-year-old brother, I stood outside a real estate office, hoping to secure a one-bedroom flat for my hardworking mother. She was already at work, unable to stand in line, and this wasn’t the first time we found ourselves in this situation.

When we were told we couldn’t inspect the property without an adult, I prayed Kieran would be there. And he was. Without hesitation, he stepped in, understood our struggle, and gave us the keys. Because of him, we had a home when we needed it most.

Kieran’s kindness reminds me that the smallest acts of compassion can leave a lasting impact. Sometimes, we don’t realize how our work—whatever it may be—can change someone’s life. This episode is a tribute to him and to everyone who chooses to see, understand, and help.