The title says it all for this episode. One of us has made it over the finish line and here's how it feels!

It's been a long time coming but there's still longer to wait. EP and Em chat through more nuances about the paperwork, training, home study and more questions involved with the licensing problem.

We promised you an unscripted view into our fostering journey... well, here it is. Em planned on telling her extended family during their Thanksgiving get-together. How did it go? Tune in now because her story takes a curious and unplanned turn!

It feels like 'becoming a foster parent' is so different that you have to define it, announce it. You can feel nervous or overwhelmed at the thought of verbalizing your choice to become a foster parent.

Here's the first little glimpse of what it can be like to tell people you're fostering; you'll hear a little from each end of the spectrum, as EP and Em could not feel more differently on this topic.

Home studies are completed for private adoption and public foster care. Each home study is different. Some are invasive, some are casual. EP had plenty of fears and anxieties going into her home study (that her husband didn't really share).

At the same time, Em has been thinking about how she can celebrate the fact that she's becoming a mom. She's not pregnant, so that 'natural' ways like baby showers or celebratory dinners doesn't feel fitting. But we both feel it's important for Em's community to support and lift her up in the same way she does when one of her community members is pregnant and parenting. We think we have a solution and we want to normalize it!

Resource Links

• Find out more about Post-Placement Party Planning at fosterhoodunscripted.org
• Definitions:
  • Sibling sets
  • Emergency placement
  • TPR (Termination of Parental Rights)
  • Food scarcity/insecurity

You have heard how long this process can take and this episode gives you a sneak peek into what the emotions are for someone during that time. Have you thought about it? Wondered what it'd be like for yourself? Listen in... can you see yourself doing this?

Reference Links

• Emergency Planning Toolkit
• Information about GROW Trainings (Michigan resources)
  • First aid
  • CPR
• Social history example
• Family collage example
• Self-assessment for future foster parents

Corrective Notes

We use words like "bio mom" or "adoptive parents" and other language that describes individuals involved with child welfare. There's a common phrase and theory called the Adoption Triad that does not involve foster parents but is relevant to understanding the world of child welfare, foster care and adoption.

There's significant, impactful and important research that has been completed and is being done about the biology of kids who have experienced trauma. We encourage you to learn more about brain behavior, child development and the impact of child or adolescent trauma.

We stumble over the words here, but what we're referencing is the Michigan Department of Health & Human Services

Another quick interregnum for your listening pleasure. Keeping it light-hearted and HONEST.

Training is required and included (for free in most states) in the licensing process of becoming a foster parent. Although you'll hear just one example today, know that each state and agency has their own standards and expectations for foster parent training. More on Em's training in future episodes. Again, remember that we are not experts, do not claim all training will look similar, nor seek to provide information about training in all states. We simply hope to provide you with a small bit of context in hopes that it encourages you to seek more answers with local foster care organizations or child placing agencies where you live.

Resources

• TBRI (TCU)
• Binti
• Books, podcasts and papers can be found on our website
• Foster parent support groups can also be found with your local agency or Facebook group.