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What do you do when your parents aren't dying, but they're not really living either? And worse—what do you do with the guilty thought: when will this be over?

Suzee's parents are in their 80s, healthy enough, but they've stopped doing anything. Just sitting. Watching YouTube. Existing. And watching it is surprisingly unbearable. But as Beth pushes, something harder emerges: Is Suzee worried about them, or uncomfortable that they've chosen stillness when she needs them to keep going?

Beth counters with her own difficult truth: she lost both parents young and admits there's a jealousy hearing friends complain about their boring, healthy parents. At least they're still here to be boring.

The conversation lands on an impossible question: How do you stay connected to parents who are choosing to disconnect? How do you grieve someone still alive but already kind of... gone?

There's no resolution because there isn't one. We end where we started—in the question. Whether you're frustrated by your parents' choices or mourning the ones you've lost, this won't fix it. But you're not alone in not having it figured out. We're all just getting used to it.

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You know that feeling when your partner walks in stressed and your body knows before they even speak? That chest-tightening dread that feels like being pulled into a riptide? That's anxiety contagion—and it might be ruining your week. Suzee's husband spirals about money. Even though she does the budget and knows they're fine, his panic hijacks her. Two days of crisis mode later, she proves they're okay. He's instantly fine. She's wrung out and resentful. Beth's version is different: total contraction. When her partner announced they needed to cut spending by 40% at Christmas, she froze. No Target for two months. Dish soap guilt. Different response, same trap.

The impossible question: What happens when NOT getting on the anxiety train makes things worse? When boundaries get you accused of not caring? There's no answer here. Just two women admitting they're still figuring out how to love someone without drowning in their fear. If you're exhausted from being Command Central for everyone's emotions, this won't solve it. But you're not alone.

Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Getting Used To It!
If you enjoyed today’s conversation, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving us a review—it helps others discover the show! We’d also love to hear your thoughts, so drop us a comment or connect with us on social media.

Stay connected, stay curious, and we’ll see you next time!

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Your adult child is living at home. And instead of treating it like a failure, what if you designed it to actually work?

In many cultures, kids stay home until marriage. In this economy, it's increasingly common. But we don't talk about HOW to make it work - the practical boundaries, the financial conversations, the design of a launch pad instead of a holding pattern.

Suzee and Beth discuss different cultural approaches to multigenerational living, how to set up your home and expectations for success, and why the outside judgment matters less than what actually works for your family.

Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Getting Used To It!
If you enjoyed today’s conversation, please consider subscribing, rating, and leaving us a review—it helps others discover the show! We’d also love to hear your thoughts, so drop us a comment or connect with us on social media.

Stay connected, stay curious, and we’ll see you next time!