MY SHAME over Looking Bad MADE ME the BAD Guy cover art

MY SHAME over Looking Bad MADE ME the BAD Guy

MY SHAME over Looking Bad MADE ME the BAD Guy

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 Have you ever brought your pain to your husband, only to be told "you're shaming me" — and did the conversation end right there? In this episode, Jay admits on camera that he knowingly used shame as a tactic to shut Lori down. Not because she was attacking him. But because it worked. We walk through 8 QUESTIONS about how shame operates in addiction and betrayal trauma — including the difference between legitimate shame that leads to change and illegitimate shame that becomes a hiding place. Jay also shares what he was actually protecting when he claimed he felt ashamed, and what belief about himself would have changed everything. If you've been told you're "shaming him" just for bringing up your pain, this one is for you. Questions we cover: When does legitimate shame stop being remorse and start becoming an excuse? Did Jay knowingly use "you're shaming me" to stop the conversation? What if shame over thinking you're a bad person actually makes you a bad person? What was he really protecting? What do wives misunderstand about how addicts use shame? Questions for the comments: Have you ever been told you were shaming him just for bringing up your pain? Does his shame look like the start of brokenness — or defensiveness? Addicts: what do you fear more — looking bad, or hurting your wife? -- To Rebuild Trust - https://thecouplecure.com/contact-me/ To Recover from Betrayal Trauma - https://pornpainhealed.com/contact-me/ Guys to Schedule a Free Call with Jay - https://porniskillingme.com/schedule-a-free-intro-call/ To Say Thanks ("Tip Jar") - https://buy.stripe.com/8wM6pe74F9LsdkA8ww -- Who is This Channel For? If porn addiction has you stuck--whether you want freedom as an addict, or you want the pain to stop as a betrayed spouse, or you need trust rebuilt in your relationship--this podcast can help. Our marriage was nearly destroyed by Jay’s porn addiction, but we found ways to make life and marriage much better than before. Now, as Trauma-Trained Certified Mentors, we’re using those best practices to help you find the peace, joy and love you’re seeking. #betrayal #relationships #pornaddiction #marriageadvice #shame #guilt #guilty
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