In this rich, wide-ranging conversation, Safrianna sits down with Women's Empowerment Coach and Executive Coach Johanna Lyman (she/they) to explore what men really want — and why the answer might surprise you. Spoiler: it's not what society has been telling us.

Johanna brings 20 years of experience as an executive coach, a mystery school background, a stint as an exotic dancer, and a trauma-informed lens to this conversation. Together, Safrianna and Johanna unpack the distortions patriarchy has placed on masculine identity, the epidemic of male loneliness, and why "men only want sex" is actually a profound misreading of the human need for connection.

They discuss the divine masculine and divine feminine — energies that live within all of us regardless of gender — and how toxic masculinity has warped those energies into something that harms everyone, men included. From Brene Brown's research on shame to the incel movement to the miniseries Adolescence, they trace how unhealed trauma and emotional starvation are playing out at a cultural and political level.

Johanna shares how her time as an exotic dancer taught her that men's deepest longing isn't sex — it's to be seen, heard, and truly known. She and Safrianna explore how sex workers and healing practitioners sometimes provide the only space where men feel safe enough to be vulnerable, and what that says about how we've failed men emotionally.

The conversation also addresses the educational system's neglect of boys, the loneliness epidemic among cis straight men, compulsory sexuality, sexual trauma, the scarcity mentality driving "us vs. them" culture, and how building robust support systems — not just depending on a partner — is essential for everyone's healing.

This is a conversation with compassion at its center: seeing the trauma underneath the behavior, without excusing the harm it causes.

Topics Covered:

—Divine masculine and divine feminine energy — and how both have been distorted

—The male loneliness epidemic and the epidemic of "no homo" culture

—What Johanna learned from dancing: men want connection, not just sex

—Brene Brown's research on shame and the male "don't be weak" box

—Toxic masculinity as the patriarchy's legacy — and how it harms men too

—The incel movement, Andrew Tate, and the trauma underneath the rage

—Compulsory sexuality and its role in sexual trauma

—Why emotional education has been withheld from men — and what that costs everyone

—The scarcity myth: justice work for one group doesn't diminish another

—Practical tools: journaling, community, professional support, and the Mankind Project

—Building support systems beyond your romantic partner

—Hope and healing through curiosity, compassion, and connection

Content Warning: This episode discusses sexual trauma, sexual assault, compulsory sexuality, political violence, and the incel movement. Please care for yourself as you listen.

This podcast is for anyone ready to explore uncomfortable truths, do the inner work, and contribute to collective healing. If you're tired of surface-level conversations and ready to go deeper, this is your space.

Connect with Johanna Lyman: linkedin.com/in/johannalyman

Contact: Guide@Safrianna.com | Safrianna.com | LivingLUNAs.com