Most women in a marriage breakdown are not financially clueless. They are intelligent women who never had the chance to be involved in the money, and that gap becomes dangerous the moment a marriage ends.

Tasia sits with divorce attorney Drew Soshnik for part two of their hot takes on the book "Strangers" by Belle Burden, and the focus is one thing: financial agency. Subscribe for more conversations on women, money, and building real financial confidence.

Drew, who practices divorce law in four states including New York, walks through what he does first when a woman arrives at a low ebb. He steadies her confidence, teaches the concepts at a basic level, and builds a team around her, a financial planner or advisor she actually relates to. That sequence matters because confidence, not capability, is usually the thing that has atrophied. Most of these women, in his experience, are more than financially adept once the fear lifts.

The conversation gets concrete about process. Once a separation or divorce petition is filed, the first move is provisional or temporary orders that settle who lives where, who pays which bills, and how the children are handled. Drew explains why the heavy discovery, the long lists of document requests and interrogatories, is a timing and strategy decision, not an automatic first step. He and Tasia name the hardest stretch of all: the year before anything is filed, when a spouse controls the accounts, no court can compel disclosure, and a woman trying to save her marriage has almost no leverage.

They also unpack the parts of Belle's story that drew criticism after a New Yorker article surfaced questions about her trusts. Drew separates a true generation-skipping trust, which a spouse has no right to, from a trust a beneficiary can request distributions from, which changes the legal picture entirely. He clarifies a point many people miss: a prenup can waive temporary spousal maintenance, but it cannot touch child support, custody, or parenting time, and a prenup that tries to may invalidate itself.

The episode closes on the moment Belle agreed to meet her husband alone, with no attorney in the room, hours before settlement. Drew calls that a predictable power move designed to remove her advisors and her leverage, and explains the house-heavy mistake that leaves women with property and no cash. The throughline is empowering, not frightening: there is no shame in not knowing your finances, almost everyone has the ability to learn, and it is never too late to build agency over your money.

This conversation connects to wealth building, financial independence, prenuptial agreements, estate and trust planning, and the financial side of divorce and widowhood.

WHAT YOU'LL LEARN

• The three things a divorce attorney does first to rebuild financial confidence
• Why the year before any filing is the most vulnerable financial stretch
• What a prenup can and cannot waive (child support is protected)
• Why meeting alone with no attorney is almost always a mistake

If this episode helped you think differently about protecting your assets, subscribe to Graceful Investor for more conversations that help you take control of your financial future. Share this with someone who needs to hear it before they make similar decisions.

DISCLAIMER

The content shared on this channel is for educational and entertainment purposes only and should not be considered financial, legal, or investment advice. Always consult with a qualified financial professional before making investment decisions. The host is not a licensed financial advisor. All investments carry risk, including the potential loss of principal.

LINKS & RESOURCES

"Strangers" by Belle Burden: https://www.amazon.com/Strangers-Memoir-Marriage-Belle-Burden/dp/0593733312

Drew Soshnik's law practice: https://www.faegredrinker.com/en/professionals/s/soshnick-andrew-z#tab-Overview

Previous episode with Drew Soshnik: https://youtu.be/0HBwm8LeevA

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