4:2 Blindsided by Rage: An IFS Look at Firefighter Parts
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4:2 Blindsided by Rage: An IFS Look at Firefighter Parts
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In this episode, Susan explores what Internal Family Systems (IFS) calls "firefighter" parts — protective parts that flood in with fast, intense reactions like rage, trying to put out old emotional pain, often at a cost to the relationship. She explains why these reactions aren't really about your child's behavior, and why healing them doesn't require your child to change first — using a real coaching conversation as an illustration along the way.
In this episode, you'll learn:
- What a firefighter part is in IFS, and why intense, "zero to sixty" reactions are often this part protecting an old, tender wound — not a reflection of your character as a parent.
- How to recognize the moment a firefighter part has "hijacked" you, and why simply noticing it is the first and most powerful step.
- Why healing this pattern doesn't just improve your relationship with your child — it breaks a cycle that would otherwise pass down to the next generation.
Full episode transcript available here
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