What happens when women don’t just show up for a workout… but for each other?

In this episode of Live Your Jam, Ellen McGinnis sits down with Pam Stafford, community leader, former mayor, and the creator of a dance-based fitness class that has been running for over 46 years.

What started as a simple aerobic class became something much deeper. A space where women of all ages, from their 40s to their 90s, come together to move, connect, and build something that goes far beyond fitness.

Because this isn’t really about choreography, calorie burn, or getting it “right.”

It’s about consistency, belonging, and what happens when people feel seen in a space they return to week after week, year after year.

From leading a city through economic hardship to leading a room full of women through movement, Pam shares what it actually takes to build trust, community, and something that lasts. And why, after 46 years, women are still walking through those doors.

If you’ve ever struggled to stay consistent, find your people, or create something meaningful… this conversation will change how you think about all of it.

You will learn:

• Why women are more consistent when community is present
• What 46 years of teaching reveals about human connection
• The difference between a class and a true community
• How movement strengthens both mental and emotional health
• Why learning choreography challenges and protects your brain
• The leadership traits that build long-term trust and loyalty
• How to create spaces where people feel welcomed and seen
• Why perfection doesn’t matter, but showing up does
• The role of movement in healing, especially during hard seasons
• Why meaning, not motivation, is what keeps people coming back

👉 Watch the full conversation and subscribe for more stories about intuition, purpose, and living your jam.

We talk about:

• 00:00 What keeps women coming back for decades
• 02:00 From local leadership to 46 years of teaching movement
• 05:00 Lessons from serving on city council and as mayor
• 08:00 Why this class feels different from traditional fitness
• 11:00 The power of multi-generational movement (ages 40 to 90+)
• 14:00 How consistency is built through connection, not discipline
• 17:00 Why choreography strengthens the brain and builds resilience
• 20:00 The mental challenge of learning something new
• 23:00 Movement as a tool for long-term cognitive health
• 26:00 How the class adapted and stayed alive during the pandemic
• 29:00 Why people needed movement and connection more than ever
• 31:00 Creating a space where everyone feels welcome
• 33:00 Why you don’t need to be “good” to start
• 35:00 The difference between showing up and belonging
• 38:00 What 46 years of this work has given Pam

Connect with Pam:

• Website: https://cityofrohnertpark.hosted.civiclive.com/city_hall/departments/community_services/classes/teens___adults/dancercise

Connect with Ellen

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/liveyourjam
• LinkedIn: https://www.instagram.com/liveyourjam
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/liveyourjam
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnj7_LS2kaxfyPsAd1Hne8g
• Website: https://liveyourjam.com/

What if the thing keeping you stuck… isn’t weakness, lack of discipline, or even trauma itself, but the story you’ve built to survive it?

In this episode of Live Your Jam, Ellen McGinnis sits down with psychologist, former Air Force captain, and trauma specialist Dr. Don Zaksek to unpack the silent reality many men are living through, high-functioning on the outside, quietly unraveling on the inside.

From combat veterans to elite performers, Dr. Don has spent decades working with individuals trained to endure, push through, and never break. But beneath that strength often lives isolation, shame, and a relentless inner narrative that keeps them stuck.

This conversation goes beyond surface-level mental health advice. It explores identity, purpose, emotional suppression, and what it really takes to heal when your default has always been survival.

If you’ve ever felt like you should be fine… but you’re not, this episode will challenge how you see yourself and what healing actually looks like.

You will learn:

• Why high-performing men often feel the most alone
• The difference between primary pain and the suffering we create on top of it
• How emotional numbness becomes a survival strategy (and why it’s so hard to break)
• What Dr. Don calls “the cracked lens” and how it shapes your reality
• Why over-responsibility leads to self-blame and burnout
• How trauma rewires your identity, not just your emotions
• The role of vulnerability in real, lasting healing
• What “healthy masculinity” actually looks like today
• How to reconnect with your inner voice when you’ve lost it
• Why meaning, not happiness, is what most men are actually searching for

👉 Watch the full conversation and subscribe for more stories about intuition, purpose, and living your jam.

We talk about:

• 00:00 Why men who “have it together” are struggling the most
• 03:00 Strength vs. suppression, what’s really underneath
• 06:00 The hidden cost of discipline, performance, and control
• 09:00 Primary vs. secondary suffering explained
• 12:00 Why numbness feels safer than healing
• 15:00 The loneliness epidemic in men and loss of meaning
• 18:00 The “cracked lens” and how trauma distorts reality
• 21:00 Learning to observe your thoughts instead of believing them
• 24:00 The role of vulnerability in healing
• 27:00 Reconnecting to your deeper self (self one vs. self two)
• 30:00 Why you don’t need to fix yourself, you need to understand yourself
• 33:00 Letting go of fear-based identity and control
• 36:00 What transformation actually looks like in real life
• 39:00 Choosing self-love when self-hatred feels justified

Connect with Dr. Don:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dzaksek
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61576433303574
• Medium: https://medium.com/@dzaksek

Connect with Ellen

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/liveyourjam
• LinkedIn: https://www.instagram.com/liveyourjam
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/liveyourjam
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCnj7_LS2kaxfyPsAd1Hne8g
• Website: https://liveyourjam.com/