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Own Your Pleasure with Dr. Amber Sophus

Own Your Pleasure with Dr. Amber Sophus

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Watch or listen on YouTube + all major podcast platforms!What if “good sex” has nothing to do with orgasms?In this episode, Amber, a social behavior research scientist, joins us to explore women’s sexual pleasure and why pleasure has been left out of sexual health conversations. We dive into the science and stigma around STI prevention, the role of communication and self-exploration, and how societal expectations shape our experiences in the bedroom.Amber shares insights from her research and her “Pleasure Class” workshops, unpacking why so many women struggle to identify what they actually want and how to start reclaiming it. From toys and turn-ons to boundaries and body awareness, this conversation challenges what you thought you knew about pleasure.Because great sex isn’t about performance - it’s about connection.Jump to the Good Stuff:03:29 - Why pleasure is missing from sexual health conversations07:55 - Why orgasms don’t equal good sex10:41 - The pressure to perform vs. actually enjoying sex13:07 - Why most women don’t know what they want14:03 - Self-pleasure: the foundation for better partnered sex16:55 - Toys: why what you like solo ≠ what you like with a partner18:31 - How to communicate desires during sex without killing the vibe18:49 - The “pleasure menu” concept35:26 - Why negotiating condoms can sabotage pleasure30:58 - Sexual pleasure as political (especially for Black women)41:08 - Final reflectionsPleasure Highlights:Pleasure has historically been excluded from sexual health, especially for womenGood sex is about the entire experience, not just the orgasmMany women know what they don’t want, but struggle to name what they do wantSelf-exploration is essential for confident communication with partnersPreferences vary widely and can change over timeTrying something once isn’t enough; exploration takes repetitionSolo vs. partnered pleasure can feel completely differentCommunication during sex is a skill and a game changer“Negotiating” needs (like condom use) can disconnect you from pleasureBeing in your head = being out of your body - and your pleasureSexual pleasure is deeply tied to identity, culture, and politicsPleasure extends beyond sex - mental, emotional, and physical well-being all play a roleYou don’t need permission to want pleasure but many people still feel like they doConnect with Dr. Amber Sophus:⁠Instagram⁠ @Dr.AmberSophusEnhance your self-awareness by acknowledging and understanding your behavior patterns, and foster a deeper connection with your inner self. Get the Unleashing My Power: A Women's Empowerment and Gratitude Journal to reclaim your personal power through the practice of daily gratitude and reflection. Learn more ⁠HERE⁠. Connect with Jordan D’Nelle:⁠Facebook⁠ @‌jordandnelle ⁠Instagram⁠ @‌jordandnelle ⁠Instagram⁠ @‌TheVVVPodcast⁠TikTok⁠ @‌jordandnelle⁠Youtube⁠ @jordandnelleEmail: JordanDnelle@VaginasVulvasandVibrators.comIf you loved this Episode, please support the Vaginas, Vulvas, and Vibrators podcast!Join the Patreon community:⁠ patreon.JordanDnelle.com⁠Leave an honest review on iTunes. Your ratings and reviews help this podcast impact more lives!Subscribe to Vaginas, Vulvas, and Vibrators on iTunes if you haven't already!Follow Jordan D’Nelle on social media for teasers and extras!Listen and Subscribe to the Podcast:⁠Apple Podcasts⁠⁠Spotify Podcasts⁠⁠Youtube @jordandnelle⁠*Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and/or entertainment purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. The views and opinions expressed are my own, or those of my guests, and do not necessarily reflect the views of any organizations or institutions with which I am affiliated.Website Links:⁠jordandnelle.com⁠Vaginas, Vulvas, and Vibrators, the unapologetic women’s sexual wellness podcast, normalizing pleasure, bodies, and sexual health through expert, shame-free conversations.
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