Rock Bottom With Ned Fulmer cover art

Rock Bottom With Ned Fulmer

Rock Bottom With Ned Fulmer

Written by: Fulmer Media
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Everyone makes mistakes. Some of us - really big ones. But what comes next? Rock Bottom is a show that explores people's lowest, most embarrassing, and challenging moments. Featuring raw, unfiltered conversations with comedians, creators, authors and celebrities, we talk about how they not only survived it all but transformed their lives. Hosted by Ned Fulmer, the ex-BuzzFeed Try Guys co-creator whose own Rock Bottom ranked #6 of Time's Most Viral Moments of 2022, the show blends curiosity and empathy to tell stories of experience, strength and hope. Because sometimes the only way out is through...one podcast at a time.Fulmer Media Inc. Hygiene & Healthy Living Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Social Sciences
Episodes
  • Sex Therapist Secrets & Orgasm Rock Bottoms | Vanessa & Xander Marin

    Sex Therapist Secrets & Orgasm Rock Bottoms | Vanessa & Xander Marin
    Jun 5 2026
    Licensed sex therapist Vanessa Marin and her husband Xander join Ned for an extraordinarily vulnerable conversation about the rock bottoms that transformed their relationship and launched their mission to help millions of couples reclaim intimacy. Vanessa's personal rock bottom began years before she met Xander: despite training to become a sex therapist, she couldn't orgasm with a partner. For years she faked it, delivering Oscar worthy performances while feeling increasingly disconnected from her own body and resentful of partners who never noticed. As a couple, Vanessa and Xander experienced the rock bottom that most long term relationships face but rarely discuss openly: the spark died. What began as undeniable chemistry and passion gradually faded into takeout on opposite couches, gross pajamas, and the sobering realization that neither could remember the last time they'd had sex. Xander was drowning in 70 to 80 hour work weeks, coming home at 10 PM to find Vanessa already asleep. Despite being in a relationship with a sex therapist, they weren't talking about their sex life at all until Vanessa finally confronted him with an accusatory question that sparked a major fight. All their conversations about sex became negative, creating a dangerous association that sex was a scary topic to avoid. Even couples therapy couldn't fully help them. Vanessa reveals the dirty secret of the therapy world: most marriage and family therapists receive just one unit of training on human sexuality, learning basic anatomical terms and nothing about how to actually help couples reconnect sexually. Their therapist helped them communicate better emotionally but had no practical tools for rekindling sexual intimacy. Once they began discussing sex openly and shame free, everything shifted. This episode breaks down the essential communication frameworks every couple needs. Vanessa introduces the two options method for discussing pleasure and orgasm, eliminating the deer in headlights feeling of "what do you want?" She explains the bristle effect, that visceral recoil when your partner touches you because touch has become exclusively associated with sexual expectations. The antidote: rebuilding non sexual touch through rituals like the 30 second hug (when oxytocin releases) and nightly makeout sessions with tongue that are explicitly decoupled from sex. They even made a rule: no sex allowed after making out for the first month to break the association. The conversation tackles initiation, the minefield where 87% of couples hate how sex starts in their relationship. Xander explains why men resort to juvenile tactics like boob honking: plausible deniability protects against the vulnerability of constant rejection. Vanessa reframes male initiation attempts as "I want to feel close to you right now," helping women understand that what looks like horniness is often a clumsy attempt at emotional connection. Their solution: the morning sex talk, where couples discuss whether they want to have sex that day and problem solve logistics together rather than springing a pop quiz initiation in the moment. They normalize that every couple has mismatched libidos and reframe the question from "am I horny right now?" to "am I open to getting turned on?" This shift removes the pressure to feel spontaneous desire and focuses instead on whether you want the experience of sex, the feeling during it, and the closeness afterward. Vanessa's course has helped thousands of women experience their first orgasms or learn to orgasm reliably with partners. Their book Sex Talks: Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life offers the practical roadmap they wish they'd had during their own rock bottom. Find them on Instagram at @vanessaandxanders and explore their guides and courses at vanessaandxander.com.
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • Divorce Rock Bottom: Her Mom Had a Stroke & Marriage Ended | Gabriella Pomare

    Divorce Rock Bottom: Her Mom Had a Stroke & Marriage Ended | Gabriella Pomare
    May 20 2026
    Australian family lawyer and author Gabriella Pomare joins Ned for an essential conversation about rebuilding family life after separation. Five years ago, Gabriella experienced her own devastating rock bottom: navigating a messy separation with a one-year-old son while simultaneously watching her mother suffer a catastrophic stroke that left her paralyzed and without memory. Despite being a seasoned family law practitioner, she discovered that professional expertise doesn't insulate you from the raw grief, anger, and confusion of divorce. That double trauma became the catalyst for a profound realization: separation doesn't create broken families. It creates opportunities to rewrite the family story with intention, maturity, and collaboration. Her new book The Collaborative Co-Parent offers a practical roadmap for parents navigating the impossible terrain between ending a marriage and raising healthy, emotionally secure children together. Gabriella introduces her four pillars of co-parenting communication: listen, pause, reflect, and respond. This framework helps parents regulate their own triggered emotions, filter every decision through the question "would my child be proud of this message?", and slowly transform high-conflict interactions into functional partnerships. She emphasizes that collaboration doesn't require being best friends or taking family vacations together. For some, collaboration means simply being able to exchange text messages without explosive conflict. For others, it's attending school concerts side by side or sharing holiday dinners. The definition varies by family, but the core principle remains constant: put the child's wellbeing at the center of every decision. The conversation tackles the hardest moments in co-parenting: driveway handoffs where tension is palpable, introducing new romantic partners, navigating holidays, managing the impulse to make children into confidants, and the ongoing grief that resurfaces unpredictably even years after separation. Gabriella shares her own rock bottom moment as a co-parent: a Christmas Day five years ago when she let anger about her ex's new relationship prevent their son from spending time with his father. That moment of recognizing her own failure became the springboard for everything that followed. She breaks down why the family law system often fails families, how courts can't address the emotional trauma of separation, the myth of parental rights (children have rights to relationships with parents, not the other way around), and why slowing down prevents years of expensive litigation. As both a practitioner who sees the worst-case scenarios daily and a parent who has lived through the confusion herself, Gabriella offers a rare dual perspective. This episode also explores the concept of accountability as the essential ingredient for moving forward. Both parents must take responsibility for their role in the relationship's end and the hurt caused, not to assign blame, but to get on the same page about the past so they can build something new. Gabriella emphasizes that separation isn't failure. It's an opportunity to reclaim power, rediscover individual identity, and create a life aligned with your actual values rather than performing an increasingly hollow version of partnership. For anyone navigating separation, struggling with co-parenting communication, introducing new partners into blended families, or simply trying to understand how to protect children from adult conflict, this conversation offers compassionate, practical guidance. Gabriella's book and her free communication resources are available at thecollaborativecoparent.com, and you can follow her on Instagram at @thegabriellapomare.
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    57 mins
  • My Rock Bottom

    My Rock Bottom
    May 6 2026
    Marnie Breecker, from Helping Couples Heal, interviews Ned.
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    47 mins
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