In Season 1 we had a conversation the week of Thanksgiving that we want to share again as we conclude Season 3. Holiday tables can be warm, funny, and deeply desired—and they can also be minefields of subtle jabs, old roles, and unspoken rules. We name the ache beneath nostalgia and share a grounded, faith-based way to move from autopilot to awareness so you can keep your peace without losing yourself.

Using Dan Siegel’s flashlight metaphor, we show how to shift your focus intentionally, notice what sits at the edge of awareness, and choose responses that fit your values. The goal isn’t a flawless holiday; it’s an honest and hopeful one.

If this conversation helps you breathe a little easier heading into the season, share it with a friend, subscribe for more story-wise episodes, and leave a review to help others find the show.

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What if the shortest path to joy runs straight through your tears? We sit down with Mary Ellen Owen to unpack why uncomforted harm teaches us to banish tenderness, how that “closed book” stance blocks love, and why grief— often done in the presence of a safe other—becomes embodied surrender that restores our capacity for connection. This conversation bridges trauma theory, attachment, and Christian hope, showing how the Spirit turns stony, stubborn hearts into tender, responsive ones.

We name the defenses that once protected but now imprison, and we explore the “banished feminine” as the lost capacities of openness, need, and comfort that every person carries. You’ll hear practical ways to begin: change your posture to signal intention, seek a wise story-hearer, notice unexpected tears in films, songs, poems, or scripture, and cultivate imagination for God as the tear collector who comes close. Along the way, we wrestle with desire and risk—why grieving well actually expands longing for God and people, and how hope invites us to love again even after deep loss.

Threaded through are anchoring scriptures: Ezekiel’s promise of a heart of flesh, Paul’s mirror of being known, and the Revelation vision of home where God dwells with us and wipes every tear. Rather than managing pain by numbing, we practice grieving as those with hope, enlarging our inner home for the Comforter. If you’ve ever wondered how to move from self-protection to real presence, this is a gentle, courageous guide.

If this resonates, share it with someone who needs permission to cry, subscribe for more story-centered conversations, and leave a review with the question you’re sitting with right now.

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We sit down with counselor and artist Mary Ellen Owen for a candid, life-giving conversation about why tears matter, how to tell when your present reactions are hooked to old stories, and what it takes to move from self-protection to genuine comfort. Mary Ellen unpacks the crucial difference between acute grief—the wrecking ball moments of death, divorce, and diagnosis—and the quieter, lingering grief we outrun with busyness and control. Her insight is disarming and practical: it is not pain alone that shapes us, but pain plus isolation. Comfort changes everything.

Mary Ellen revisits her own turning point with the “wailing women” of Jeremiah and shows why many of us need to be led into lament. This isn’t wallowing; it’s relational healing. When we risk grief in safe company—human and divine—we discover the Comforter who collects our tears in a bottle and restores our capacity for delight. The result is a lived paradox: holding death and resurrection at once.

Book reference: “Mourner, Mother, Midwife: Reimagining God’s Delivering Presence in the Old Testament” by L. Juliana M. Claassens

Listen now, share this episode with a friend who needs comfort, and leave a review to help others find the show. Subscribe for part two with Mary Ellen as we go deeper into practices that make lament a path to resilient joy.

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