If family gatherings leave you feeling drained or like you're reverting to an old version of yourself, you're not alone. EMDR therapist and yoga teacher, Abby Albright, returns to discuss the invisible rules governing dysfunctional family systems and how they intensify during the holidays.
We explore six categories of unspoken family rules: emotional (don't feel, don't be sad), need-based (don't need anything), relational (don't rock the boat, don't outshine anyone), role-based, loyalty (protect the family image), and safety rules. These aren't written anywhere, but they live in our bodies and shape how we show up.
Abby shares how these patterns create physical tension, why breaking invisible rules feels scary, and practical ways to find choice within challenging family dynamics. We talk about being a pattern breaker and giving yourself permission to show up differently, even in small ways.
What You'll Learn:
- How to recognize the six types of invisible family rules
- Why family gossip reinforces dysfunctional patterns
- The gap between family image and reality
- Small ways to practice choice during difficult gatherings
- When to lean into curiosity vs. contain awareness
Check out Abby's Therapeutic Yoga offerings here
For more on dysfunctional family dynamics around the holidays, tune into:
Family Dysfunction: What It Is and What To Do With It
Dysfunctional Family Dynamics & The Holidays
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Learn more about EMDR & trauma therapy in Pennsylvania with Reclaim Therapy
This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended as a substitute for professional medical, psychological, or nutritional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Remember, I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. Nothing in this podcast is meant to replace actual therapy or treatment. If you're in crisis or things feel really unsafe right now, please reach out to someone. You can call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, text them, or head to your nearest ER.
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