Laura Federico speaks with author Rachel Khong about her new short story collection, My Dear You. They discuss the Susan Sontag quote: “What I really wanted was every kind of life, and the writer's life seemed the most inclusive” and how it’s really about desire for experience. The conversation moves through the book's central themes: midlife reckoning, ambivalence about parenthood, and the pandemic's role in forcing a confrontation with mortality and limitation. Rachel describes writing as a way to metabolize rather than resolve these questions, and fiction as a tool for approaching self-judgment with more compassion.

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My Dear You by Rachel Khong

Rachel's web site

The Cycle Book by Laura Federico

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03:49 — Is it better to desire or to be desired?

05:53 — The Susan Sontag quote: "What I wanted was every kind of life"

06:22 — Sliding doors and midlife

09:28 — Writing as compassion for what you're struggling with

15:00 — Social media as desire machine

16:24 — "Trying to become yourself in a time when it's so easy to be somebody else"

18:00 — AI and imposed technology

24:36 — Aliens, ghosts, sex dolls, and God texting all of humanity

29:00 — The pandemic paved the way for AI relationships

32:14 — Courage isn't the absence of fear: choosing curiosity alongside it

35:21 — Wendell Berry's creatures vs. machines

Host Laura Federico speaks with food and culture writer Alicia Kennedy about her new book, On Eating. They trace how meat has long symbolized masculinity, power, and American abundance, and why we have the ability to create social change through food. They also talk about sibling grief and the role her brother plays in the book.

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On Eating by Alicia Kennedy

Alicia's newsletter

Tomato Tomato

The Cycle Book by Laura Federico

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01:00 — Thinness as purity culture

03:39 — The desire question: Alicia answers as a Scorpio

05:00 — Loving the world while doubting collective will to change

08:09 — "No ethical consumption under capitalism" as a convenient excuse to stop trying

10:32 — Eleven Madison Park and RFK Jr.'s food pyramid

17:19 — Why unlabeled plant-based food works and why labeling it vegan usually doesn't

20:16 — The ruthless omnivore as boys' club entry ticket

22:35 — Women on social media performing hunger while visibly restricting

27:29 — Writing about sibling loss

31:09 — Moving to Puerto Rico and critiquing tourism

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Our music, Hit Her Up, is written by Nakisso Peralta and performed by Chillers.

Actress, singer, and author Gina Gershon talks about her new memoir AlphaPussy: How I Survived the Valley and Learned to Love My Boobs with Laura Federico, psychotherapist and host of The Desire Question. Gina resists the idea of AlphaPussy as a guidebook, saying the real message is to know and be honest with yourself. She turns the tables and asks Laura about sex in this climate of swipe culture, sex robots, and a shrinking appetite for soul connection. The episode ends, as the book does, with a rallying cry for self-knowledge.

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AlphaPussy by Gina Gershon

The Cycle Book by Laura Federico

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02:31 — Is it better to desire or be desired?

06:01 — Gina tells a younger woman who couldn't confront a harassing guru: "Until you can do that, you're always gonna be in a subservient position"

07:38 — "Some people say follow the money, but I say listen to my gut"

08:00 — Growing up without social media gave Gina an advantage in reading people

11:37 — Gina describes being so empathic she sometimes couldn't leave the house

12:54 — "People are scared, and you know what? They should be. It's a weird time."

13:32 — Gina asks Laura: are people's sex lives diminishing?

14:26 — Sex robots, swipe culture, and the shrinking soul connection

17:21 — How the book actually came together

18:36 — The gap between what we say we want and what we actually believe

21:28 — To thine own self be true

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Our music, Hit Her Up, is written by Nakisso Peralta and performed by Chillers.