This week, we chat with dating coach/columnist (and former pickup artist) Harris O’Malley, a.k.a. Doctor NerdLove, whose work we’ve admired for a long time! He gave us some advice on flirting, dating, conversational skills, and more.

Pickup Artistry | Dark Night of the Soul | Fear of Rejection | What Even Is Flirting? | Bad at Flirting – Please Be Blunt | Neurodivergent Nerds | Rules vs. Vibes | Disarmingly Honest | Asking No Questions | The Question Game | Breaking the Touch Barrier | Sex(y) Conversations | Staying in the Moment | Improv Skills | Building Social Momentum | What If? (2013) | Sleeping with Other People (2015) | A Nice Indian Boy (2024) | Do As We Say, Not As They Did

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

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Romantic yearning can be deeply painful, but it’s also kinda hot and fun. This week we discuss our experiences with this unique emotion in contexts like long-distance relationships and unrequited love.

Is It Good? | General vs. Specific | Desire | Defining ‘Yearning’ | Emotional Sadomasochism | Long-Distance | Enjoying It | Creative Outlet | Incels | Heated Rivalry | Gendered Tropes | Men’s Emotions | Yandere | Taking Initiative | Neediness | Turning It Up or Down | Sexual Yearning | Receiving End

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week, we discuss our favorite sexual fantasies of 2025, the sex & dating goals we set for ourselves last year, and our new goals for 2026.

Fantasies | Sex Robots | Work Sex | Forced to Be Bored | Safer Sex | Anonymous Sex | Femdom & Dorky Virgins | Toronto vs. New York | Double Penetration | Sex Nerd Workspace | Sex For Fun | Communicating Better | Socializing | Sex Therapy School | Queer Media Archiving | Good Gender Feelings | Questions on Dates | New Goals | Non-Sex Hobbies | PIV Orgasms | Love | The Internet | Beginner’s Mind

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Happy new year! This week we’re reflecting on the biggest changes in our sex & dating lives in 2025, the sex toys we loved most, and the weirdest sex we had all year.

Rest & Movies | Overall Changes | Hookups | Libido Troubles | Horny 4 Intimacy | Living Together | Low-Dose Naltrexone | Emotional Energy | Monogamous Crushes | New Things | BJ Buddy | Random Act of Muff Dive | Belly Stuff | Fingered in a Park | De-Escalation | Tail-Fucking | PIV & CBT | We-Vibe Tango X | Doc Johnson Mochi Stroker | Lovense Lush Mini | Magic Wand Waterproof | Lelo Switch | Pre-Breakup Sex | Best/Weirdest Sex

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Happy holidays to those celebrating! We’re discussing objectification kink again this week, through a seasonal lens.

Holiday Stress | Giving People as Gifts | Sex Coupons & Cards | Re-Focusing | Manhandling | Bored & Ignored | Sexualizing vs. Objectifying | Previous Holiday Episodes (1, 2, 3)

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

What does it mean to be ‘objectified’ in a kink scene, and how is that different from the other, less-hot ways one can be objectified? This week we’re discussing the nuances of this complex kink.

Nonconsensual Objectification | Marginalization & Trust | Just a Hole | Empathy | What’s Hot About It? | Quiet Mind | Authentic Desire | The New Topping Book | Favorite Object | Praise | Environment & Vibe | Distraction Play | Glory Holes | Objectifying Doms | 101 Kinky Things

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week we dive deeper into kinky-on-vanilla relationships, discussing how to tell if someone might be vanilla, how to explore kink outside of a newly-opened relationship, and whether fantasy and porn can be good substitutes for IRL kink.

Language & CBT | How to Spot Vanillas | Kinky Flirting | In Love With a Vanilla Person | Opening the Relationship | Polyamorous Kinksters | Fantasy & Porn | Basic Skillset | SIMMER Negotiation Guide | “Maybe Later” | “Read This, Please!”

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Can a kinkster be truly satisfied dating a vanilla person, and vice-versa? This week we discuss bridging the gap between kinky and vanilla partners!

Dating Apps | Time & Place | Kinky Linguistic Cues | Defining “Vanilla” | Sexual Hobbyism | Our Experiences with Vanilla People | Willing vs. Want | Explaining Why | Rejecting Vanillas | Don’t Settle | Beginner-Friendly Resources | 101 Kinky Things Even You Can Do | Why Are People Into That? | The New Topping Book + The New Bottoming Book

Credits:

Music by PROTODOME

Artwork by Addison Finch

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.