We are giddy to welcome OC Man and Honorary Chick THE Jon Timmons as our guest while we discuss I Walk The Line aka the election episode. There's a Pickin' Chicken, a terrible haircut, and a whole (bleep) ton of misdemeanors. Vote for us, dear hearts!

It's Halloween in Bluebell, which means it's time for costumes, candy, and contrivances! George goes out marionettin' after midnight, where Zoe is his dream world girlfriend, which pisses off Maitre Double-07 Kinsella... Wade Kinsella. AB and Lavon fake-date to get the votes of the Torklesons, much to Lemon's weird dismay. It's nonsense, dear hearts, but it's OUR nonsense.

Flash mob, dear hearts! This week, we discuss Bluebell's problematic attitude about Zoe dating a high school football player, as well as a song that sounds like 1972. Plus, Grandpa still hates Lavon, and this episode is tight as all get out.

Comb out your mullets and pull on your line-dancing boots, because we're all about the Achy Breaky Hearts. George and Wade take a trip into the woods with EJ's platonic crush Grant Goodman, and everyone else deals with Bluebell matters of the heart. Plant your bittycoins and grow a money tree with us, dear hearts. No doubts!

A-tisket a-tasket! We have an OCMan in our picnic basket this week. Sparks fly as Russell helps us break down the bachelor basket auction episode. Unlike Twelfth Night, this basket auction is as heteronormative as they come. Zoe and Wade go on a real date while George and his Manic Picnic Dream Girl, Tansy, commit a felony. Lemon mistakenly ends up with Lavon and Brick realizes shopping apps are super useful. Moo at us from the bachelor corral, dear hearts.

We choo-choo-choose you, dear hearts! This week, we're bringing you a minisode in the form of the Mushy Ushy Gushy Sweetie Pie Pod Dance, where we bring our favorite townies some baskets and giggle like the amazing women we are. Don't worry-- there's no paper in this pie.

We're having a Flu Christmas, dear hearts! This week, Jessica's family got hit with the wickedest bug, so she wasn't able to record with Jaleh & Eliza Jo. Through the magic of Bluebell (and amazing editing), we bring you Blue Christmas, with caroling, cookies, and decisions both great and terrible. Get your flu shot and listen to our Very Special Episode.

It's Pioneer Day, dear hearts. As the town attempts to recreate days of yore, Zoe and Wade ask themselves, "WWLLJJD?" when they take advice from Cricket and the diary of Bluebell's founding mother. Meanwhile, Lloyd (aka George) attempts to help Brick dump Shelby. Lemon and AnnaBeth try to fool Lavon and Southern Living magazine. The town avoids the truth of their past. Meatball and OCMan Jamie join us this week in Old Alabama. Now grab me a drink, grog wench!