Takeaways

• If you feel unheard, move from casual comments to clear, calm, eye-to-eye communication.
• Use a simple tool to confirm understanding: ask your partner to repeat back what they heard.
• Avoid the escalation trap—yelling or manipulation may ‘work,’ but it costs connection.
• Discern the issue: negotiable irritation vs. moral/ethical boundary vs. safety concern.
• Sometimes love means: “I don’t like this, but I love you—and I can live with it” (when it’s healthy to do so).

Dr. Mark A. Hicks explores what to do when you’re not being heard in a relationship—especially in marriage or long-term partnership. He emphasizes that being unheard doesn’t always mean a relationship is broken; often life is busy and communication gets lost. The solution starts with intentional timing and calm clarity: sit down, make eye contact, and name the problem without blame. He recommends using reflective listening—asking your partner to repeat back the idea of what you said—to confirm the message landed.

If the issue persists, Dr. Hicks warns against a common temptation: escalating volume or using manipulation. While it can create short-term compliance, it typically leads to resentment and shutdown. Finally, he encourages discernment: some issues are non-negotiable (safety, moral or ethical boundaries), but many frustrations are not worth damaging the relationship over. Healthy relationships don’t have to be perfect—they need to be healthy, connected, and grounded in love.

Key Topics Covered:

• Feeling unheard in marriage and romantic partnerships
• Clear, calm communication vs. casual comments
• Timing, attention, and “eye-to-eye” conversations
• Reflective listening: repeating back what was heard
• The escalation trap: yelling, wrath, and manipulation
• Choosing battles: letting go vs. drawing boundaries
• Core personality traits and realistic expectations
• When counseling or therapy may be needed
• Healthy relationships: imperfect but emotionally safe and thriving

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

Takeaways

• Trauma is not only psychological—it’s stored in the body.
• Traditional therapy doesn’t always reach the root of trauma.
• Healing begins by finding safety in your body and nervous system.

In this eye-opening episode of The Learning Love Podcast, Dr. Mark Hicks speaks with Bee Doyle, a former combat medic and now spiritual guide, about her journey through PTSD, addiction, and deep healing. Bee opens up about the limitations of traditional therapy and how modalities like breathwork, yoga, and acupuncture helped her reconnect with her body and spirit. This episode is a must-listen for anyone struggling with unresolved trauma or looking for holistic approaches to emotional wellness.

Key Topics Covered:

• Bee’s experience in Afghanistan as a combat medic
• The disconnect between external achievements and internal suffering
• Why talk therapy sometimes fails trauma survivors
• The importance of somatic healing and nervous system regulation
• Breathwork and yoga as entry points for healing
• Ancestral trauma and generational healing
• How motherhood deepened Bee’s commitment to healing
• Bee's upcoming book Keepers of the Light

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

In this conversation, Mark Hicks explores the essential role of love in building meaningful relationships. He discusses common myths surrounding romantic partnerships, particularly the unrealistic expectation that partners should be mind readers. Hicks emphasizes the importance of communication, appreciation, and gratitude in navigating the complexities of relationships as life evolves. He encourages listeners to articulate their needs and celebrate their partner's efforts, fostering a deeper connection and understanding.

Takeaways

• Love is the answer to building relationships.
• We must learn to apply love in our lives.
• Expecting partners to read minds is unrealistic.
• Compatibility can change over time.
• Life's complexities require open communication.
• Expressing needs is crucial in relationships.
• Gratitude enhances relationship dynamics.
• Celebrate your partner's efforts, even if imperfect.
• Assumptions can lead to misunderstandings.
• Continuous communication strengthens relationships.

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

Pre-order Liz's book: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/flowers-bloom-anyway-a-memoir-liz-fiedler-mergen/1148638651?ean=9781636989273

In this deeply moving episode of The Learning Love Podcast, host Dr. Mark A. Hicks sits down with Dr. Liz Fiedler Mergen—nurse practitioner, flower farmer, podcast host, and author—for an unforgettable conversation on love, loss, grief, and resilience.

Just four months into her career as a nurse practitioner, Liz's life was turned upside down when her husband passed away suddenly from a heart attack. She was pregnant with their second child. What followed was a journey through unimaginable grief, single parenthood, and ultimately, the rebuilding of a life she never planned—but one she now loves.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• How Liz turned a small flower stand into a thriving flower farm and event space
• Why anger is a natural (and often overlooked) stage of grief
• The difference between the Golden Rule and the Platinum Rule in supporting others through loss
• How community, practical support, and honest conversations carried her through her darkest days
• The emotional challenges and beauty of finding love again and blending families
• Behind-the-scenes stories from her upcoming memoir, Flowers Bloom Anyway: Rebuilding a Life You Didn’t Choose

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

In this episode, Mark Hicks delves into the profound concept that 'love is the answer' and emphasizes the importance of creating a peaceful environment for love to flourish. He discusses how stress and tension can hinder emotional connections in relationships, whether with partners, family, or friends. Mark highlights the necessity of learning to relax, as many individuals struggle to unwind even when there are no immediate crises. He explains that relaxation is a skill that requires practice and cannot simply be forced through willpower or logic.

Mark provides practical strategies for achieving relaxation, such as engaging in active relaxation techniques, deep breathing, and reassuring oneself of safety. He stresses that relaxation is not about demanding it from oneself but rather about earning it through acknowledgment of one’s efforts and achievements. By practicing these techniques, individuals can improve their emotional connections and overall well-being, leading to healthier relationships. The episode concludes with a reminder that learning to relax is a journey that can significantly enhance the quality of our interactions with loved ones.

Takeaways

• Love is the answer; we must explore the questions.
• Relaxation is a skill that needs to be learned.
• You cannot force yourself to relax; it requires practice.
• Reassuring yourself that you are safe can help your nervous system.
• Active relaxation techniques can aid in unwinding.

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

In this conversation, Mark Hicks delves into the multifaceted nature of love, emphasizing the importance of emotions, particularly sadness, in fostering healthy relationships. He argues that society has largely replaced sadness with anger, leading to a culture that values toughness over vulnerability. Hicks advocates for the reintroduction of sadness as a necessary emotion for healing and compassion, suggesting that acknowledging our feelings can lead to healthier interactions in families, workplaces, and communities.

Takeaways

• Love is the answer, but we must explore the questions.
• Emotion is a vital component of love.
• Sadness is an emotion we need to bring back.
• Society often replaces sadness with anger.
• Anger is a stereotype for strength, especially in men.
• Women also face pressure to appear strong and tough.
• Sadness is often dismissed as weakness.
• Our nervous system reacts differently to anger and sadness.
• Sadness calls us to healing and compassion.
• We need to practice sadness to improve our relationships.

Chapters

00:00 The Three Phases of Starting Over

03:35 The Dismissal of Feelings in Business and Family

06:10 The Replacement of Sadness with Anger

10:03 Understanding Anger and Sadness

12:26 The Importance of Compassion and Healing

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

In this conversation, Mark Hicks explores the concept of starting over in life, emphasizing that love is the answer to many of life's challenges. He discusses the importance of recognizing when it's time to make a change, the fantasy of erasing the past, and the necessity of going through a grief process to heal. Hicks highlights the significance of mutual agreement in relationships, the unpredictability of life, and the importance of learning from past experiences without creating villains. He also addresses the need for a strategic approach to professional changes and outlines three essential phases for starting over: grief, honesty, and taking small steps.

Takeaways

• Love is the answer to life's challenges.
• You are never truly stuck in life.
• Starting over requires a realistic approach, not fantasy.
• Grief is essential for healing and moving forward.
• Emotional scars can coexist with a fulfilling life.
• New patterns must replace old ones for true change.
• Life's unpredictability means you don't need a clear vision.
• Learning from past relationships is crucial for growth.
• Avoid creating villains in your personal narratives.
• Take small, actionable steps towards change.

Chapters

00:00 The Power of Love and Starting Over

02:05 Facing the Fantasy of Starting Over

04:45 The Process of Healing and Grief

08:44 Building New Patterns in Relationships

12:48 Starting Over Alone: Lessons Learned

16:19 Navigating Career Changes and Professional Growth

21:08 The Three Phases of Starting Over

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/

In this episode of the Learning Love Podcast, Dr. Mark A. Hicks, the host, discusses his new book 'Learning Love,' set to be released on June 10, 2025, by Morgan James Publishing. Dr. Hicks shares his journey of writing and the life lessons about relationships he learned through the experience. He recounts the various stages of his writing process, his move to Prague, fortuitous meetings with friends who guided him through self-publishing, and his eventual collaboration with Morgan James Publishing. Additionally, he delves into broader themes such as the importance of self-love, the practicality of love as a skillset, and the inclusive power of love in overcoming division. The episode emphasizes the application of love in personal and communal life and tackles the misguided belief that love can eradicate all fears and darkness. Instead, it positions love as a balancing force that enhances life quality. The podcast also explores fundamental questions like 'Who made that rule?' to challenge societal norms and encourage listeners to embrace rest and self-worth regardless of productivity levels.

00:00 Welcome to the Learning Love Podcast

00:34 The Journey of Writing 'Learning Love'

02:04 Meeting Don and the Path to Self-Publishing

04:16 From Self-Publishing to Morgan James Publishing

07:58 The Practicality of Love

11:54 The Inclusive Nature of Love

13:35 The Image of Love and Self-Love

19:14 The Goals and Misconceptions of Love

24:56 Questioning Life's Rules

29:10 Final Thoughts and Gratitude

Dr. Mark A. Hicks, author of the book 'Learning Love,' provides tangible, real-life insights on how to build healthy, happy, thriving relationships, even if you come from a dysfunctional family background, have been through a divorce, or struggled with relationships in the past. Love isn't about fate. Love is a skill set, and this is the place to learn that skill set as we spend some time learning love.

Order "Learning Love: Building a Life that Matters and Healthy Relationships that Last": https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/learning-love-mark-a-hicks/1146412363?ean=9781636985954

Visit Dr. Mark A. Hicks online: https://www.markahicks.com/