The comments brushed off as harmless.
The behaviour explained by sympathy.
The quiet voice inside that knows something is wrong, long before the evidence appears.

In this episode, I share what unfolded as my relationship began to bleed into friendships, family dynamics, and my sense of self. How dishonesty didn’t arrive loudly, but drip by drip. How betrayal rarely looks dramatic at first. And how trust, once fractured, is often repaired by denial rather than truth.

I talk about the times I ignored my own instincts. The times I chose belief over evidence. And the moment everything unravelled when I walked into my own home and found the truth waiting there.

This is not a story about blame.
It’s a story about conditioning.
About how capable, intelligent women are taught to doubt themselves before they doubt others.

This episode is for anyone who has ever minimised their own discomfort, defended behaviour that didn’t sit right, or stayed longer than they should have because leaving felt harder than enduring.

It’s about learning to recognise when empathy becomes self-abandonment. And why rebuilding trust starts with turning it back towards yourself.

This is about the cost of not listening when your body already knows!

About Sandra:

Sandra ten Hoope is a Sales & Story Strategist and corporate attorney. Drawing from her own experiences with three challenging relationships, she empowers professional women to rewrite their personal narratives. In her 2020 book, Do Not Try HIM at Home, Sandra reveals the duality of her life—successfully closing multi-million-pound deals while living in fear at home. The book struck a chord with countless women who saw their own struggles reflected in her story, offering them comfort and a sense of community.

Many entrepreneurs among her readers reached out, eager to understand how their personal stories could enhance their business growth. Sandra's answer was clear: personal experiences, no matter how difficult, are invaluable assets. As a Certified Business Strategist and Master Persuader, she created the Stop Waffling, Start Selling podcast, helping business owners harness the power of their unique stories. This storytelling approach personalizes brands and draws in clients, with Sandra advocating for strategic sharing, even in small doses, to make a powerful impact.