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What does it actually mean when we say a child is gifted?

And what about when that same child is really struggling?

I’m joined by the wonderful Mark Talaga, a counsellor who specialises in working with gifted and twice-exceptional (2e) children and adults.

This one is quite personal for me because giftedness is part of our family story too. And I’ve often found it quite difficult to talk about.

Because saying your child is struggling feels acceptable. Saying your child is gifted can somehow feel like you’re showing off.

But the two can absolutely sit side by side.

Mark and I chat about what 2e actually means, why being incredibly capable in one area doesn't mean everything else comes easily, and why these kids can sometimes be completely misunderstood.

We talk boredom, anxiety, shutting down, the pressure of having “so much potential” and what can happen when the way a child thinks and learns doesn't fit neatly into the classroom.

There’s a lot in this one about looking beyond what a child is struggling with, understanding what might actually be going on underneath and, perhaps most importantly, finding people who get them.

If you want to connect with Mark you can find him here:

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hopelesslygifted

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hopelesslygifted/

Center for Identity Potential: www.centerforidentitypotential.com

Mentioned in this episode

If This Is a Gift, Can I Send It Back? by Jen Merrill

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This episode comes with a content note. Rachel and I talk openly about suicidal thoughts and suicidal ideation in parents, including our own experiences and what it can feel like when everything becomes too much.

Please listen with care. If today isn't the day for this conversation, give this one a miss and come back to it another time.

Rachel Winder from Auticulate joined me for a conversation that went in quite a few different directions.

Because that's how our brains work.

We make connections, go off down a completely different path, forget where we started, find our way back again and occasionally get completely distracted by a dog.

This isn't the neatest, most linear podcast conversation I've ever recorded. But perhaps that's exactly why I didn't want to edit all of that out.

It's two neurodivergent brains having a conversation in the way that comes naturally to us.

We started with suicidal ideation in parents and the shame that can come with admitting that you are struggling and you have had thoughts about not wanting to be here anymore. Especially when you're a parent and there's that added voice saying, *but how could you ever think about leaving your children?*

We talk about what can sit underneath those thoughts. Overwhelm. Isolation. Not feeling understood. Asking for help and being told there isn't any. The fear that admitting you're struggling could lead to people questioning your ability to parent.

And that really important human need to feel that we belong somewhere.

Rachel also talks about what happens to her executive functioning when she reaches that point of overwhelm and some of the things she has learnt can help.

And then, because this is us, we travel through meltdowns, autistic social skills, Girl Guides, David Attenborough, thinking in pictures, education, AI as an accessibility tool and linear ableism,

It is a very human conversation about a very difficult subject. There is laughter in it too, because sometimes there can be lightness alongside really hard things.

**Please remember:** if you're experiencing suicidal thoughts or feel that you may not be able to keep yourself safe, you don't have to sit with that alone.

**Samaritans:** Call 116 123, free, 24 hours a day
**Shout:** Text SHOUT to 85258
**NHS 111:** Call 111 and select the mental health option for urgent mental health support
**Emergency:** If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E.

You'll also hear more about Rachel's work with Auticulate and her experiences of autism, ADHD, dyslexia, education and communication.

You can find Rachel here:
https://www.instagram.com/auticulate_autisticallyblunt/
https://www.tiktok.com/@auticulate
@Auticulate

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This Bookshelf episode reminded me that sometimes a book gives us far more than just a good story.

Jo joined me to talk about Passiontide by Monique Roffey, but we ended up chatting about so much more than the book itself. We talked about finding a bit of escapism when life keeps you close to home, why some books completely pull you in, and how reading isn't always straightforward for all of us.

As two people who both find reading hard work, we also found ourselves talking about dyslexia, audiobooks, rereading pages and why the right book is worth the effort.

Jo also shared something I hadn't expected. As the story unfolds, women from very different backgrounds come together to stand up for what's right. It reminded her of the SEND parent community and how parents so often find strength in each other when the system feels stacked against them.

If you've ever been looking for a book that transports you somewhere else, or you've wondered whether you're the only one who struggles to read, I think you'll really enjoy this conversation.

Jo has definitely persuaded me to add a few more of Monique Roffey's books to my ever-growing list. If you'd like to have a look at her other books too, you'll find them on her website: www.moniqueroffey.com

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The Untypical Podcaster Lab

If you'd love to start a podcast but the usual advice just doesn't seem to fit you, come and have a look at The Untypical Podcaster Lab. I'll help you go from podcast brainwave to your very first episode in just two weeks, in a way that works for you. It starts on Monday 17th August.

https://info.the-untypical-ot.co.uk/untypical-podcaster-lab

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