More soft dolphin humor. We're upgrading our lives and moving into a blue basement and keeping our heads out of the outhouse. 

Ever try to break the record for the most shower tears? This week the boys take a look into some of the weirdest records ever held. Well records, and recorders, and vinyl records. Nate updates your ideas on German fingering, Matt brings you back to the scholastic book fair, and Nate brings it back to science with some space jazz. Did they mean finger as a noun or a verb? Better find out. 

Broken hearts unite. Let the candy hearts whisper sweet nothings into your teeth like cavities. We talk heartbreaking sports loss. Heart break in the physical sense like bum bum bum bum under the floorboard, the house has a heartbeat, kind of way. Let your heart riot through the hot topic of your soul. It's emo bangs season, so it's time to eat some roses. 

Have you ever been in need of an inflatable dick crown and a black light poster? Well did you forget about the mall? Yes the mall is back folks. This week the boys explore every inch of the now overgrown and abandoned American shopping malls. Maybe we transform them into modern day coliseums? Maybe we keep them around for the Spencers Gifts. Or maybe we go live in the woods until we die from a bear attack. So grab an Orange Julius sit back and relax.  

This Is Nothing presents: "Wet," a relevant welcome to February, after a dry(ish) January and all the overflowing moist the green northwest offers this time of year. We ask the question, "does wetness exist? if so, how wet does it have to be to be a liquid?" I guess because it will pool up and spill over a table? There will be time for debate... for the procession of Dingus and puddles of wet laughter. 

Are you the top bannana? This week take a deep dive into that crunchy, smooth nut that likes to strut. The humble peanut has been a man, a song, and a legend. The boys explore the legends of the peanut gallery, old timey phrases, a song about dying form a rotten nut, and the man known as Mr.Peanut and his spawn. Got an allergy? Well watch out for the Portland Park Peanut Man. 

All three main topics right there in a clever title. How great is that. We're apartment hunting so we're like "hunting... that's a topic," and so we went with it. 

Ever wonder if camels get turned on looking at each others humps? This week the boys are taking a break and talk about finally drying out for the new year. Wether it be alcohol, humor, clothes, or deserts, they cover it all this week. Also Bipedal camels, their mummy overlords, N/A cocktails and a whole mess of other delusional details. Hump up the jams its 2023 ya'll.