What is it actually like the first time you’re with a woman?

In this episode, Alix & Kayla talk about first times with girls — the magical ones, the awkward ones, the confusing ones, and the ones that quietly change everything. Drawing from listener stories, polls, and their own experiences, they explore what it means when desire finally makes sense, why some first times feel life-changing and others feel messy, and how fear, alcohol, shame, curiosity, and timing all shape our queer awakenings.

From being a “ ‘straight’ girl” at a gay bar to sober sex, baby gay panic, internalized homophobia, and the relief of realizing you’re not broken — just queer and nervous — this conversation is honest, funny, and deeply relatable.

Whether your first time was magical, chaotic, or still hasn’t happened yet, this episode is for anyone navigating queerness, curiosity, and the moments that quietly rewrite your story.

01:45 – Today’s Topic: First Time With a Girl
03:00 – Listener Poll Results: Magical vs Awkward First Times
05:30 – How Old Were You the First Time?
06:45 – Did You Come Out After?
08:00 – Game Time: First-Time Confessions
10:40 – Identity Crisis vs Peace After the First Time
12:00 – Listener Story: First Time With a Woman After Only Dating Men
14:45 – Feeling Like a Teenager Again
16:45 – Why Exploring Identity Matters (Even If It Changes)
18:00 – Is the First Time Scarier Without “Knowing What to Do”?
20:20 – Listener Story: A Bad First Time That Still Meant Something
23:20 – What Counts as “Lesbian Sex,” Anyway?
26:00 – Intentional vs Party Hookups
29:00 – When It Finally “Clicks”
31:00 – Listener Story: Calm, Clarity, and First-Time Love
33:00 – Dating Men vs Dating Women: The Intimacy Wall
36:45 – Wishing You’d Figured It Out Sooner
38:00 – Listener Story: Awkward, Nervous, Perfectly Imperfect
40:15 – Why the Build-Up Is Often the Hardest Part
42:30 – Hooking Up With Someone Who’s Never Been With a Girl
45:00 – Sober Sex, Alcohol, and Lowered Inhibitions
47:45 – “Who’s the Problem?” Baby Gay Panic Edition
52:00 – Internalized Homophobia vs Externalized Heterophobia
54:00 – Closing Thoughts: You’re Not Broken, You’re Queer

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Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

What does body image look like when you’re queer, partnered, confident… and still unlearning everything you were taught?

In this episode, Alix & Kayla get deeply honest about body image, desire, and self-perception inside queer relationships. They talk about comparing yourself to your past body, feeling pressure to look “gay enough,” navigating femme and masc expectations, and how confidence, strength, and self-expression shape attraction far more than size or shape.

From almond moms and Gen Z style anxiety to masculinity, femininity, fitness, sex, and learning how to dress—and live—for yourself, this conversation explores what it really means to feel at home in your body when the rules you grew up with no longer apply.

This is a candid, funny, and thoughtful episode about queer identity, lesbian relationships, body neutrality, confidence, and the slow, imperfect work of decentering the gaze and choosing yourself.

00:00 – Intro: Married, Codependent, and Back in the Jungle
01:00 – Queer Camp Update + Life in Nicaragua
05:30 – Today’s Topic: Body Image in Queer Relationships
06:40 – “My Body Had to Be ___ to Deserve Affection”
09:00 – Comparing Your Body to Your Past Self
11:00 – Unlearning Food, Rest, and Exercise Guilt
13:35 – Body Image in the Queer World vs the Straight World
17:00 – Confidence, Self-Expression, and Attraction
19:00 – Dating Women: Feeling Bigger, Stronger, or More Visible
24:30 – When Body Image Wasn’t the Problem at All
26:00 – Weight Gain, Health, and Changing Body Shapes
28:00 – Masculinity, Femininity, and Wanting a Different Body
31:00 – Being Femme, Being “Hot,” and Decentering Men
34:00 – Getting Dressed for Yourself (Not the Gaze)
37:15 – Listener Hot Takes on Body Image
39:30 – Masc vs Femme Bodies & Internalized Misogyny
42:00 – Aesthetic Attraction vs Romantic Attraction
44:00 – Power, Confidence, and “The Hotter Partner”
46:20 – Are Queer People Expected to Be More Body-Evolved?
49:45 – Gender Identity vs Learned Body Shame
52:40 – Who’s the Problem: Men, Women, or the Patriarchy?
58:30 – The One Thing We All Fixate On
01:00:00 – Why We Do This to Ourselves

🔔 Subscribe on YouTube for more episodes
🎧 Listen on Spotify
Follow WNS on Instagram
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Follow Kayla
Follow Alix
Visit our retreat center in Nicaragua!

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

In this episode, Alix & Kayla unpack one of the most controversial queer takes on the internet: being attracted to women, sleeping with women, but not wanting to date or marry them. Is it preference, internalized homophobia, avoidance, or just honest self-awareness?

Through listener submissions, they dive into WLW stereotypes, deal breakers, attachment styles, emotional intensity, codependency, and why queer relationships can feel so confronting. This episode is funny, nuanced, validating, and guaranteed to spark debate.

00:00 – Intro: married, not related, very codependent
02:00 – Listener love, sister wives & queer community updates
06:00 – Deal breakers: kids, lying, cheating & location
10:00 – Hygiene, finances & political differences
16:05 – Topic intro: “I’m into women but wouldn’t date one”
17:10 – WLW stereotypes: neediness, codependency & you-hauling
21:00 – Hookups vs dating & honesty vs leading people on
25:20 – Intimacy, fear & emotional closeness with women
29:50 – “Women are what I desire, men are what I tolerate”
35:30 – Right person vs wrong person
39:00 – Independence, merging lives & feeling suffocated
44:00 – Avoidant attachment & relationship panic
49:30 – Who’s the Problem: toothbrush edition
56:30 – Final thoughts & listener call-to-action

#WLWPodcast #QueerPodcast #LesbianPodcast #BiVisibility #WLWRelationships #QueerDating #AttachmentTheory #QueerDiscourse #WivesNotSisters #LGBTQPodcast

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

What happens when you come out online—and thousands of people decide they’re done with you?

In this episode, Alix & Kayla unpack cancel culture, internet outrage, and the emotional, financial, and personal fallout of coming out publicly. From losing 50,000 followers to navigating homophobia disguised as “wellness,” they explore why the internet struggles with nuance, change, and coexistence—and why scrolling past the beans might save us all.

This is a raw, thoughtful conversation about queerness, yoga culture, social media power, cancel culture, and learning how to live outside the echo chamber.

00:00 – Intro: married, queer, and back online
02:10 – Cancelable or not? Internet apology culture
05:15 – Cancel culture vs real accountability
07:45 – Allegations, platforms & public judgment
12:50 – Cancel culture fatigue & social currency
14:30 – Coming out online & losing 50,000 followers
18:40 – COVID, internet culture & rising hostility
22:45 – “Colonizer,” “predator,” and wellness backlash
25:05 – Is social media a workplace? Queerness at work
32:20 – Why follower loss still matters
38:30 – Yoga, religion & spiritualized homophobia
43:00 – Inclusivity with an asterisk
47:00 – The Bean Soup Theory & online outrage
52:15 – Echo chambers, empathy & coexistence
01:04:00 – Who’s the problem? Public figures & politics

#QueerPodcast #CancelCulture #LGBTQPodcast #InternetCulture #ComingOutOnline #WellnessIndustry #QueerVoices #YogaCulture #SocialMediaTalk #WivesNotSisters

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

In this episode, married queers Alix & Kayla debate one of the most polarizing topics in LGBTQ+ culture—from gay bars and lesbian parties to allies, baby gays, and the future of community spaces. It’s thoughtful, funny, deeply personal… and ends with the messiest Who’s the Problem yet (yes, it involves towels).

This conversation explores queer history, safety, allyship, feminism, chosen family, and why context matters more than hard rules.

00:00 – Intro: married, queer & back for the new year
02:10 – “Everyone’s a little bi?” identity & labels
04:30 – The real question: straight people in queer spaces
07:45 – Coming out in 2009 & first gay bar experiences
12:05 – Why queer spaces feel intimidating (and necessary)
15:10 – Straight friends, allies & knowing the culture
18:45 – Lesbian spaces vs gay male spaces
22:10 – When inclusion goes too far (and when it doesn’t)
25:45 – Queer Camp: who it’s for and why it changed everything
31:30 – Bars vs retreats: sex, safety & intention
36:30 – Can you even “police” queerness?
41:45 – WHO’S THE PROBLEM: The Towel Incident 🫠
49:50 – Final thoughts & listener call-in

#QueerPodcast #LGBTQPodcast #QueerSpaces #Allyship #LesbianPodcast #StraightInGaySpaces #QueerCommunity #ChosenFamily #Feminism #WivesNotSisters #WhoIsTheProblem

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Why does it feel like every WLW couple is breaking up right now?
In this episode, Alix and Kayla unpack the recent wave of WLW breakups—from emotional burnout and attachment styles to visibility pressure, queer dating dynamics, and why sapphic relationships can feel so intense. They discuss common breakup patterns, listener perspectives, and how queer relationships navigate communication, community overlap, and healing after a split.

00:00 – Intro & why WLW breakups feel different
03:10 – Emotional enmeshment in queer relationships
07:40 – Why “let’s stay friends” often backfires
12:50 – Identity loss after a WLW breakup
18:30 – Attachment styles & emotional mirroring
24:40 – Boundaries, no-contact & healing
30:20 – Grief, longing & nervous system repair
35:10 – What actually helps you move on
40:00 – Closing reflections

#WLW #QueerPodcast #LesbianBreakups #Sapphic #QueerRelationships #WLWDating #QueerCulture #LesbianPodcast

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Is it cheating… or just crossing a line?

Alix and Kayla kick off the new year from Nicaragua by playing "Cheating or No?" —breaking down gray-area relationship scenarios like shared playlists, DMs, flirting, emotional affairs, and “we weren’t official” loopholes. They read listener-submitted cheating stories that include coworker crushes, wedding-night confessions, secret double lives, and queer awakenings sparked by one kiss. Honest, funny, and unfiltered conversations about boundaries, emotional intimacy, and why cheating isn’t always about sex.

00:00 Intro from Nicaragua + lost episode recap
02:50 Game: Cheating or No? (playlists, DMs, flirting, nudes)
07:09 Listener cheating stories begin
08:00 Emotional affair with a coworker
13:45 Best friend confesses love before the wedding
22:18 “It wasn’t cheating because it was a girl”
28:20 Secret double life & poly vs monogamy
35:10 “We weren’t official” situationship disaster
40:20 Who’s the problem? Personal cheating story
46:00 Is staying with a cheater worse than cheating?

#CheatingOrNo #QueerPodcast #WLW #LesbianPodcast #RelationshipAdvice #EmotionalCheating #Situationships #QueerStories #DatingBoundaries

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!

Are homoerotic friendships a canon queer experience? 🌈
Recording from their new studio in Nicaragua, Alix and Kayla dive into homoerotic WLW friendships—the kind that blur the line between “best friend” and “something more.” From red/green flag dating games to listener submissions about twin-bed cuddling, forehead kisses, shared Google Docs, and lifelong “what ifs,” this episode unpacks queer longing, closeted intimacy, and the friendships that change us forever. Plus: a late-addition deep dive into Wicked as the ultimate WLW-coded friendship.

00:00 Intro from Nicaragua + new studio setup
01:20 Listener submissions & why this episode exists
02:40 Red Flag / Green Flag / Beige Flag (WLW edition)
06:10 Common outcomes of homoerotic friendships
08:45 Listener Story #1: “The book I never got to finish”
15:30 Personal college story & grief, queerness, and longing
19:40 More submissions: roommates, Google Docs, future fantasies
28:55 Shooting your shot vs. staying silent
38:30 High school crushes & delayed coming out
46:20 Who’s the problem? (Spoiler: society)
49:10 Wicked, Glinda & Elphaba, and WLW-coded friendships

#QueerPodcast #WLW #HomoeroticFriendships #LesbianPodcast #QueerStories #Situationships #ComingOut #QueerCulture #WickedMovie #Sapphic

Connect with us on social media: IG: @wivesnotsisterspod | TikTok: @wivesnotsisterspod | Youtube: @wivesnotsisterspod

Follow our hosts on Instagram: @kaylalanielsen @alix_tucker

You can also watch our episodes on Youtube at youtube.com/@wivesnotsisterspod!