Showing results for "Cut!" in Literature & Fiction

Samantha is a professional seductress and con artist with a heart of gold. If she talked about her work, she’d tell you she only pilfers organs for medical research and that she only takes one kidney, and she only steals those kidneys from dishonest people. It’s hell on her social life. Abe is the doctor and Sam's partner in crime. He isn’t much of a criminal. Except for the kidney stealing. But he’s using that money to fund his research that he anticipates will be able to cure diabetes. So, all for a good cause...? You decide. Of course, it's hell on his social life.

Myrna, Leonie, and Chrissy meet every Thursday to sample fine cheeses, to reminisce about their former lives as professors, and lately, to muse about murder. Decades ago, a vicious cabal of male poets contrived—quite publicly and successfully—to undermine the writing career, confidence, and health of their dear friend Fern. Now, after Fern has taken a turn for the worse, her three old friends decide that it’s finally time to strike back—in secret, of course, since Fern is far too gentle to approve of a vendetta.

Here's a batch of raunchy XXX-rated songs.

P.J. O'Rourke traces his development from hippie protester to conservative grouch to jaded humorist. Along the way, we are privy to his strange, twisted days as editor in chief of National Lampoon, as well as the in-depth looks at appropriate sports for middle-aged Republicans, namely those which can be engaged in with a smuggled Havana between the teeth - fly-fishing, bird hunting, deep-sea fishing, and of course, golf. Plus, you'll hear O'Rourke's take on the Virtues of Automobiles - because what good was oil doing sitting in the ground for millions of years? - and many other hilarious rants in this off-the-wall collection by America's premier political humorist.

The mid-sized battle tank is nicknamed “The Dervish” and costs $95 million to produce.

The catcher is a statistical savant, the first baseman speaks in Buddhist koans, and the twin star pitchers may or may not derive mystical powers from scars betraying their Siamese birth. In fact, everything about the Birmingham Barons baseball team is remarkable - except for their performance on the field. For decades, the Barons have been woefully mediocre and Pudge Morrison - former better-than-average left fielder now long past his prime - has become the symbol for the team's disappointment.

Rolf Miller, der "Meister des unfreiwilligen Humors" ist mit einem neuen Programm auf dem Plan und man darf sich wieder auf ein Halbsatz-Festival freuen. Millers Figur ist wohl eine der schrägsten im derzeitigen Comedy-Urwald. Ein wahrer Prachtkerl geistigen Tiefflugs: "er weiß nicht, was er sagt, aber er meint es genauso". So traf Ottfried Fischer in Ottis Schlachthof den Nagel auf den Kopf.

Disgraced in the US, maverick ad man Eliott Thurber is forced to transfer to the newly opened London offices of Parabola Media. The clash of cultures has hilarious consequences as he tries to cope with promoting a range of peculiar products, challenging clients and not to mention his disgruntled new colleagues. His first assignment is a gourmet cat food for an intensely conservative company but Eliott has his eyes on a bigger prize, American investment in the NHS. After all, "where there's pain, there's gain..."

This just in from The Onion, America's finest news source.