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Because We Are Bad

OCD and a Girl Lost in Thought

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Because We Are Bad

Written by: Lily Bailey
Narrated by: Lily Bailey
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About this listen

'Extremely compelling' – THE GUARDIAN
'Remarkable'
– WASHINGTON POST
'A beautifully-rendered memoir' – PUBLISHERS WEEKLY


Because We Are Bad is a gripping, fast-paced non-fiction memoir that takes you inside the invisible war of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) — where a single intrusive thought can feel like a verdict, and where the mind insists that certainty is the only form of safety.

From the outside, Lily is a bright, capable girl navigating school, friendships, and family life. On the inside, her days are governed by dread: unwanted images, taboo thoughts, sudden spikes of anxiety, and the persistent fear that thinking something "bad" means being bad.

OCD is not neat, quirky, or harmless in this story. It is urgent, intelligent, and exhausting — an illness that hijacks logic, steals time, and makes ordinary moments feel dangerous.

Written with razor-sharp clarity and literary elegance, Because We Are Bad has the pace of a thriller: a page-turning true story of rituals and mental compulsions, of moral panic and secret rules, of the desperate bargains made to keep disaster away.

Lily Bailey captures the looping nature of obsession — the way intrusive thoughts return, mutate, and demand new answers — while showing how shame and silence can tighten the trap. This is narrative nonfiction at its most intimate: an OCD memoir that turns a private disorder into a vivid, cinematic reading experience.

Yet this is not only a story of suffering. It is also a story of survival, insight, and recovery — the hard-won shift from fear-driven obedience to the possibility of freedom. With compassion and hard truth, Bailey traces how OCD distorts identity ("because we are bad"), and how naming the disorder can become the first step toward reclaiming the self. If you have ever lived with anxiety, panic, depression, perfectionism, rumination, or the crushing need to "get it right," you will recognise the emotional squeeze of a brain that refuses to let go.

Inside this unforgettable mental health memoir, you'll hear:

  • A vivid, honest portrait of life with OCD and intrusive thoughts, including the isolating pressure to appear "fine."

  • The hidden mechanics of compulsions — checking, reassurance seeking, avoidance, mental reviewing — and how they can escalate in secret.

  • A moving coming-of-age journey through fear, courage, family, and the complicated work of growing up with mental illness.

  • A voice that is intelligent, humane, and fiercely readable: candid, darkly funny at times, and always compassionate.

Because We Are Bad is essential for anyone searching for an OCD memoir, an obsessive-compulsive disorder autobiography, or a powerful mental health book that combines literary nonfiction with real-life urgency.

If you crave narrative non-fiction that is emotionally intense, psychologically precise, and impossible to put down, Lily Bailey delivers. Because We Are Bad offers the rare combination of speed and depth: the propulsive momentum of a true life story and the enduring resonance of a book that changes how you see the mind.


©2018 Canbury Press (P)2018 Canbury Press
Developmental Psychology Medical Mental Health Professionals & Academics Psychology Psychology & Mental Health
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Critic Reviews

'Extremely compelling' - The Guardian 'Remarkable... She writes with literary poise and a gift for mordant observation and self-deprecating humour that belie her youth. I hope this book finds a wide readership. It will offer solace to OCD sufferers... for other readers, it will provide a harrowing sense of what many OCD sufferers have to endure just to get through the day.' - Scott Stossel, Washington Post 'Model and journalist Bailey offers an authentic and stunning account of her struggle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder in this beautifully-rendered memoir.' - Publishers Weekly 'Often as chilling as Sylvia Plath's The Bell Jar, but also full of so much inner and external turbulence that it reminded me at times of The Bourne Identity and Memento.' - Will Black, Huffpost UK 'A harrowingly honest memoir of profound psychological struggle. In her courageous book, the author offers compelling insight into the pain and destructive power of OCD as well as the resilience of a young woman determined to beat the odds.' - Kirkus Reviews 'A fascinating read. It's brilliantly written; I felt inside your head' - Ray D'Arcy Show, RTE Radio 1 'Because We Are Bad is an emotional, challenging read. Lily takes us deep into the heart of the illness but she is also a deft writer, and even the darkest moments are peppered with wit and wry observations.' - James Lloyd, OCD-UK 'I laughed, I cried. I could not put this book down. Intensely moving with flashes of black humour, Because We Are Bad is the compelling account of one young woman's experience of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.' - Rosanna Greenstreet, freelance journalist 'It's a fascinating read... Buy the book! Buy the book!' - Jo Good, BBC Radio London (Various)
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