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Publisher's Summary

Brought to you by Penguin. 

Ever wanted to know what it is really like being a Premiership footballer?

Here is the ultimate guide from the much loved everyman of English football, Peter Crouch.

Towering at six feet seven inches, Crouch is prized for his self-deprecating humour, having famously answered the question “what would you be if you weren’t a footballer?” with the one liner “a virgin”. At the same time, he has had an incredible career, from World Cups to Champions League finals. He has scored more headed goals than anyone else in Premiership history and has a better goals-to-minute on the pitch ratio for England than even Michael Owen. A humble professional with a great sense of humour, Crouch is one of the few players that is liked by fans of all clubs. Of course, this is probably because he’s played for most of them.

Now nearing the end of his stellar career, he shares everything he has learnt and tells it exactly like it is in How to be a Footballer, from the most colourful aspects of the game to what really happens on and off the pitch. Honest, candid and great company, this is not your standard footballer autobiography but a true insider’s guide to our favourite sport.

From a legend of English football, this is the most entertaining sports book of the year.

©2018 Peter Crouch (P)2018 Penguin Audio

Critic Reviews

"The funniest man in British sport." (Metro

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What listeners say about How to Be a Footballer

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Amazing!!

Enjoyed every minute of it. Really Funny at times. Definitely a great book even if you're not a football fan.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 12-05-19

Fantastic Honesty

Great insight by a great bloke who really loves the game. Great for Saints !

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  • Jackie Nobbs
  • 20-08-19

Fantastic

Great Audio book kept me listening and good narration by Peter Crouch would definitely recommend

3 people found this helpful

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  • Gareme
  • 16-08-19

excellent stuff

A funny honest view from a seemingly genuine guy...even if you know nothing much about football it is a great take on modern life and celebrity

3 people found this helpful

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 01-12-18

Best footy book I’ve read in ages

Really enjoyed this! It offers a different insight into the crazy footballing world and Crouchy is the perfect tour guide to take you on that adventure!

Well written, well read, just good fun!

Nice swan Crouchy laaaa

3 people found this helpful

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  • C. Taylor
  • 10-01-20

A great book about a world too bonkers to believe

Taking a step back you soon realise how legendary a footballer Peter Crouch is, and how wide spread his knowledge and experience in the game spans. So who better to walk us through a world so few of us will ever see first hand.

1 person found this helpful

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  • Mark Winter
  • 03-05-21

Great Book

Great tales of a fantastic career from one of English footballs good guys,quirky sense of humour from Crouchy

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  • S B
  • 10-04-21

Original

Refreshing and funny to hear a football fan/players experience of the inside world of football. Top job.

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  • Dan Marnane
  • 21-03-21

Fantastic

Perfect first audio book. Just like his podcast but a bit less in depth on some of the same stories covered on both platforms.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 20-02-21

It's OK

Just another footballer talking about games we already know about. No real behind the scenes insight that we look for in a footy autobiography.

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 11-02-21

Funny. Funny

For anyone that has played football at any level and those who just love the game, you will ‘get it’ - this is a must read/listen. I found myself laughing out loud at Crouchy’s self deprecating style and sense of humour. Love this man and recognise so many of my past local footballing characters in his descriptions. No airs and graces. Just a proper bloke

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  • Anonymous User
  • 08-02-21

Crouchy

loved it, insights to the background of the game we all know and love! must listen

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  • neil baines
  • 23-04-20

Excellent

I really enjoyed this book. A great insight into life behind the scenes. Crouchy's personality coming out through the narration. A worthy purchase on Audible for sure.

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  • maia
  • 09-04-20

"Amazing"

I loved listening to this book, it helped me understand the life of a footballer and what it is like on the pitch. The sound quality is amazing and I recommend buying this book if you are into football or even if you just want something to listen to.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 13-01-20

Peter is a great story teller. Amazing insight

Worth reading even if you didn't support any of the club's he played for

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  • Fiona Lang
  • 12-01-20

Brilliant

Such a smart funny account for football lovers or people around football lovers. Peter is personable and honest. Thanks

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  • Anonymous User
  • 10-09-19

An awesome insight and a great book.

I enjoyed this book as it gives great insight in the world of professional soccer, well structured and very entertaining. It took me some time to get the British accent but a couple of minutes in and the words is flowing.

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  • Vibhu
  • 04-08-19

good light hearted read

a good insight into the inner lives of footballers. something us fans cannot really see just by watching and followong the game.

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  • Anonymous User
  • 02-05-19

Brilliant!

I really enjoyed this book, well down Crouchy!
Some great insights into the amazing, yet crazy world of being a professional footballer!

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  • Amazon Customer
  • 12-02-19

Crouchy's Done it Again

Came here from the excellent Peter Crouch Podcast. So pleased Peter narrated,thoroughly enjoyed every minute. Back stronger!

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  • Nathan
  • 05-02-19

great book

Really enjoyed this book a great look in to the behind the scenes world of professional football. a great story told by a great player!

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  • Jonathan
  • 31-12-18

Written & read by an old fashioned football legend!

Is there anybody in the football world who doesn’t like Peter Crouch? He’s a footballing gentleman and every football fan on the planet should listen to and enjoy this book. His stories of old and opinions of the modern game keep you engrossed and I’m sure like me, every listener would love an opportunity to have a beer with the man to hear more. Thanks for sharing Crouchy! (I mean.... Uch!)