Did the ancient Egyptians have B major, or were they just really into papyrus condoms? This week, Andrew and his resident logic-botherer Sam attempt to dissect the musical history of ancient Egypt, mostly concluding that three thousand years of history can't quite be summed up by Bruce Dickinson or an overly loud 90s metal kick drum.

Expect a completely uncalled-for bass-tuning intermission, a deep dive into why the 'Woke Police' banned The Bangles after 9/11, and the shocking revelation that ancient Greek war music sounds a bit too much like an Offspring track. We also listen to some genuine electronic pioneer madness involving barking dogs and celestial shapes, plus a bit of Coptic embalming music that sounds exactly like a knife going into some pharaoh's guts. It's educational, it's chaotic, and Andrew actually learns what a pentatonic scale is (sort of).

In a desperate bid to look like we know what we are talking about, we have overhauled the format. This week, Andrew drags a bewildered Dr. Sam through 1980s Liverpool to discuss why a three time Oscar winner spent his youth hiding in a camouflage suit.

We are diving deep into:

• The Scouse Trinity: Exploring the "Crucial Three".

• Julian Cope's Fear of the Floor: Why he performed on step ladders because he felt the floor was too dangerous.

• The Mysterious Drum Machine: The story behind the machine they called "Echo".

• The Big Lie: How they admitted the drum machine story was just a way to mess with journalists.

• "Caramelised Hair": The era of sugar-styling that attracted swarms of flies and smelled like a burnt bakery.

• The Cosmic Gateway: The time Bill Drummond decided a manhole cover in Matthew Street was a cosmic gateway to Iceland.

It is peak 80s chaos, involving more sugar and camouflage netting than a primary school bake sale in a war zone.

• "The Killing Moon": The one Ian McCulloch insists was written by God, though it is actually the intro to Space Oddity played backwards.

• "The Cutter": The band at the absolute peak of their 80s powers.

• "People Are Strange": The Joel Schumacher and Lost Boys payday produced by Ray Manzarek of The Doors.

• "Over the Wall": A masterpiece from their very dark, silhouette-heavy period.

• "Brussels is Haunted": The sound of the band in 2026, because they are still at it.