Is your partner's "private habit" ruining your shared intimacy? In this episode, we tackle two of the biggest, most uncomfortable elephants in the modern relationship room: physical desensitization from aggressive self-pleasure (often called "death grip") and the explosive conflict over whether porn use constitutes cheating.
If you feel numb during partnered sex, or if you feel betrayed by your partner's digital habits, this honest conversation is essential listening.
IN THIS EPISODE WE COVER:
Introduction & The Caller's Dilemma We introduce a common scenario: one partner feels hurt by porn use, the other dismisses it as "normal."
The Physical Problem: Understanding "Death Grip" How aggressive techniques and intense friction desensitize nerve endings, making partnered touch feel insufficient or frustrating. We discuss why this isn't about attraction to your partner, but a physical retraining of the body.
The Emotional Battle: "Is It Cheating?" Moving beyond the binary of "normal vs. unacceptable." Why one partner views it as a harmless release while the other experiences real emotional betrayal and feelings of inadequacy.
Recovery & Reconnection Actionable advice on retraining sensitivity to gentler touch, having the difficult conversations without defensiveness, and focusing on connection over performance while healing.
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