⚠️ Warning:

This episode is a football rant at maximum volume.

It contains impatience, contempt for grifters, timeline merchants, and lads baiting OnlyFans models for engagement like it’s a career path.

If you trust Football Twitter, buy what influencers are selling, think bad takes deserve airtime, or believe replying “DM?” counts as discourse you are beyond help.

Godspeed.

🧠 Chapo scrolls once and immediately chooses violence

🍷 Bomb drinks a full bottle of wine to lift music and unlocks feral clarity

📱 Football Twitter becomes a jungle of bad tweets, louder voices, and zero shame

🐍 Influencers flog snake oil, “systems,” and vibes-based expertise

🔴 Arsenal discourse collapses into “I watched the game actually” versus unread spreadsheets

⚽ Liverpool mentioned once and the team still argue with themselves for forty minutes

📊 Stats screenshots launched with total confidence and no responsibility or care

🗣️ “Just asking questions” deployed as a full defensive system

🪓 Tony insists the Stick of Justice would fix comment sections in under ten minutes if they dare

🐼 Trossard dragged back in for reasons nobody can explain

🍺 Old Man in the Chair says “block them” and reaches enlightenment

💸 Only Rants in Pants™ — Chapo launches a one-man crusade rinsing engagement farmers and the reply-grift economy as football Twitter officially goes up for sale

🚨 The internet once again proves that access does not equal intelligence

So pour something strong, mute the replies, and join Bomb & Chapo where football chat finally stops pretending it’s analysis and admits it’s shouting, grifting, and lads selling bollocks to other lads.

💩 P.S. It’s a rant. That’s the point.

💩 P.P.S. Sheffield is still a shithole.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

⚠️ Warning:

This episode contains industrial-grade ranting, weaponised opinions, and a Jonathan-Morley-shaped, ginger-nut-sack energy individual who treats the internet like a public inquiry into his feelings.

If you believe football discourse should be calm, balanced, or useful — turn back now. There is no hope for you.

In this week’s carnage:

🧠 Chapo attempts rational thought and immediately abandons it

🍷 Bomb drinks an entire bottle of wine to lift music — accidentally creates the perfect intro

📱 A Jonathan-Morley-shaped nut sack posts through pure vibes and Wi-Fi rage

🔴 Arsenal discourse reduced to “I watched the game actually” versus spreadsheets

⚽ Liverpool mentioned once and somehow Arsenal still live rent-free in everyone’s head

📊 Stats hurled like piss-filled water balloons (accuracy optional)

🗣️ “Just asking questions” deployed as a full defensive system

🪓 Tony declares the Stick of Justice should be applied to comment sections

🐼 Trossard dragged in again for reasons nobody — including Trossard — understands

🍺 Old Man in the Chair says “block him” and achieves instant inner peace

🚨 The internet once again proves access ≠ intelligence

So pour something strong, mute your mentions, and join Bomb & Chapo for the RANTUMUS EDITION — where football chat finally admits what it really is: vibes, grudges, and lads shouting into the void.

💩 P.S. This is satire. If you’re angry, it might be about you.

💩 P.P.S. Sheffield is still a shithole.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

⚠️ Warning: A boiler, a vape, and a Bundesliga highlight reel walk into a pub and somehow Arsenal still bottle it. Between VAR smoke, Klopp worship, and a tiny German midfielder giving everyone an existential crisis, the Tun hits new levels of combustible nonsense.

In this week’s carnage:

💨 Chapo hallucinates from boiler vapours and declares himself head of UEFA Comms

🔴 Arsenal praised, mocked, then diagnosed with chronic bottle-syndrome within three minutes

🧠 Tony compares Arteta’s tactics to “trying to toast bread with a lighter”

🧴 Irish Ken sells “official VAR fog” bottled from the men’s toilets

⚽ Liverpool fans re-write history while Jürgen’s veneers blind two pensioners

💩 Florian Wirtz described as “the size of a lamppost plug-socket” yet apparently the second coming

📺 VAR replay replaced by a YouTube clip titled “Wirtz vs Physics 2024”

🪓 Stick of Justice used to point at the telly every time Trent misplaces a pass

🐼 Existential question raised: Is Leandro Trossard actually a panda in disguise?

🍺 Old Man in the Chair demands “proper football” and immediately falls asleep

🚓 Police arrive over “unlicensed punditry” and leave arguing about xG

So crack a tin, inhale the fog, and join Chapo AND Bomb as the lads dissect Arsenal’s mood swings, Liverpool’s deluded fans moral-superiority complex, and the legend of the five-foot-three phenom Florian "£8.5m" Wirtz all through a haze of burnt heater oil and bad decisions.

💩 P.S. VAR still stands for Very Arse Results.

💩 P.P.S. Sheffield is still a shithole.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.