In this conversational episode, Dr. Jae sits down with her husband, Jeremiah, to discuss how many men—particularly Black men—approach marriage, whether they consciously realize it or not.

Together, they explore four dominant frameworks men often use to imagine what marriage is for and how they expect a wife to show up within it. These frameworks aren’t prescriptions or endorsements—they’re only lenses through their observations.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my dissertation by⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• ⁠The Kind of Love That Black Women Make: Female Capital & Cost⁠ [blog]
• ⁠Female Capital & Cost⁠ [pod]

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

In this conversational episode, Dr. Jae is joined by her husband, Jeremiah, for a candid, thoughtful dialogue about a tension that shows up in many heterosexual relationships: both men and women resisting being overworked, undervalued, and reduced to labor in marriage and partnership.

Together, they unpack how men and women often name the same exhaustion—but for very different reasons—and how unexamined expectations around provision, domestic labor, lifestyle, and longevity can strain or support relationships over time.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my dissertation by⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

CORRECTION: I referred to the wrong study in this episode. The study I meant to refer to was a study of never-been married Black men sharing what encourages and discourages toward marriage by ⁠Tera Hurt⁠.

In this conversational episode, Dr. Jae sits down with her husband, Jeremiah, for an honest, nuanced discussion on men’s perceived loss of freedom after marriage—specifically around friendships with other men.

Drawing from empirical research, lived experience, and seven years of cultivating intentional Black male community, this episode explores why many married men believe marriage limits their social lives, how some wives respond to male friendships with suspicion or indifference, and what both partners may be missing when male connection is treated as optional rather than essential.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my dissertation by⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

In this Mother’s Day special, Dr. Jae sits in the guest seat for a rare role reversal—interviewed by Miriam Arvinger, “The Girl Mom Guide.” Together, they talk about what it means to become a girl mom after raising sons, why this pregnancy was deeply intentional, and what it looks like to prepare not just for a baby… but for a daughter.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my next study by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• ⁠Joyice's IVF Story⁠
• ⁠A Male Fertility Story ⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

What happens when love, marriage, identity, lineage, and legacy all meet at the question of a last name?

In this episode, I sit down with my husband to talk through a conversation many couples eventually face but do not always prepare for with enough depth: what happens to a woman’s surname after marriage, and what should happen when children enter the picture?

This episode is for engaged couples and anyone trying to think more carefully about the meaning attached to names, family, and partnership.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my next study by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠

What happens when love, marriage, identity, lineage, and legacy all meet at the question of a last name?

In this episode, I sit down with my husband to talk through a conversation many couples eventually face but do not always prepare for with enough depth: what happens to a woman’s surname after marriage, and what should happen when children enter the picture?

This episode is for engaged couples and anyone trying to think more carefully about the meaning attached to names, family, and partnership.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my next study by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠

Join us for Part 2! Dr. Jae is in the studio with her husband, Jeremiah, to continue their protector-provide conversation.

We explore capacity versus desire, legacy versus lineage, community versus individual responsibility, and the systemic shifts that reshaped dating and marriage in the Black community over the last 50 years.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my next study by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

In this conversational episode, Dr. Jae sits down with her husband, Jeremiah, to unpack a question that keeps showing up at women’s tables and in the culture: Are men naturally wired to protect and provide—and do marriage-minded men actually want to?

Jeremiah offers a grounded framework for what “husband” means to him: caring for the woman and tending to the shared marriage space. Together, they explore “coverage” as a concept that blends protection and provision, the difference between egoless protection vs. possessive control, and why a man’s willingness to compete for a woman’s time and commitment is a meaningful signal.

Don’t forget - if you have a Secret Story you want to share with me like the one I share in this episode, then I invite you to⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠drop your truth⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ for the next Secret Story episode!

HOW I CAN HELP YOU: Interested in our ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠services⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠?

Choose your option⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.

HOW YOU CAN HELP ME: Contribute to my next study by ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠sharing your romantic experiences.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Submissions:

• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Secret Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Book your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Awareness + Secret Story Session⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Submit your⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Safe Story⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Literature & Links:

• ⁠⁠⁠The DC Relationship Education Center⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• ⁠A Hunter-Gatherer's Guide to the 21st Century⁠

Connect with Me:

• Website:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠www.joyicerobinson.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Instagram:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠@joyicerobinson⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Patreon:⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Become a Patron⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠
• Work With Me: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Book a Session⁠⁠⁠⁠