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i feel like the title kinda sums this one up. maybe a good one to fall asleep to?

i talk about the lead-up to our US vacation this summer, and how my body is betraying me one part at a time.

i do think i made some strides in my music production here though, and i promise i'll come into the next episode with something resembling energy.

love you

todd

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world is out-weirding me.

phantom smells and chlamydia.

old man butthole.

unsolicited gym advice.

mensfoss.

i love my car.

i hate fist bumps.

camping is great if you're homeless.

confrontation at McD.

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brushes with hollywood.

my gym has a sauna.

making bad things worse.

the opportunity in new information.

christ, i hope i'm just about done giving time and thought to this wretched man.

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Valentine's Sushi.

Super Bowl. Go Seahawks.

Some Orange Asshole.

Everything Is Australia.

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I tried to make a Christmas song. The more i listen, the less i like it.

LYRICS:

I'm not gonna yell at my kids today

unless they do something i don't like

it's christmas time

i'm not gonna do amphetamines

unless i get really really tired

i'm christmas high

And when it feels like i don't have much to give

There's one thing i can give to you

It's the gift of giving

Up.

I'm not gonna talk about politics

unless i wanna start a fight with my family at the dinner table

it's christmas dinner

I ain't gonna drink no alcohol

unless i've got some emotions i'm not completely prepared to process

christmas (CHRISTMAS!)

wooh

And when it feels like i don't have much to give

There's one thing i can give to you

It's the gift of giving

Up.

I'm gonna give my father something nice this year

maybe some singing lessons, or some therapy

So he can learn to manage his anger problems

And unrealistic expectations of what life should be.

Or maybe just some cool socks.

I promise not to be a total shit this year

we'll eat us a wicked dinner, and make a decent toast

Pappa's gonna wear his Nicholas Cage track suit

And we'll hug all of the people that we love the most

except for that stinky cousin

And when it feels like christmas

christmas

there's one thing i can christmas

it's the gift

of christmas.

up.

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This show has won no awards and probably won't. But there will be:

music,

and ants,

and heaven,

and sudoku,

and stuff like that.

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