• How to become a total failure

  • Written by: Cala Vox
  • Podcast
How to become a total failure cover art

How to become a total failure

Written by: Cala Vox
  • Summary

  • Welcome, dear friends, to the grand unveiling of "How to Become a Total Failure," a uniquely crafted audio experience that's sure to tickle your fancy and pique your curiosity. This interactive radio play, presented in glorious high-definition sound, offers an unconventional path to self-improvement. Each of the 10 episodes in this mini-series, masterfully produced by our diverse virtual team, guides you down the winding road to a purposeless and solitary existence - all with a dash of irony, of course. 🎭🎧🎬

    Our tongue-in-cheek advice, delivered in English, French, Spanish, Portuguese, Polish, Russian, and Chinese, aims to invert traditional self-help wisdom. Disregard our tips, and you might just stumble into a fulfilling, happy life! From the plethora of cookie-cutter workshops promising happiness, our series stands out as a refreshing departure, woven with playful humor and sounds that bring the story to life. Dare to join us on this audacious journey? 🌎🔊😄
    Cala Vox
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Episodes
  • 10 Alone at last!
    Mar 12 2022
    Congratulations!
    Having mastered the craft of self-instigated fear and manufacturing rejection from others, courtesy of this course, you've successfully ascended to your summit: the pinnacle of personal misery. Your guilt has been served its just desserts.

    You've orchestrated an exodus of everyone familiar from your life. Free from the trivialities of work, familial bonds, and friendships, you now have an open 24-hour window to moan about life's wickedness and how everyone you once knew has backstabbed you — fulfilling the prophecy you had envisioned.
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    10 mins
  • 09 Scare away your remaining friends!
    Mar 5 2022
    Assuming you've been an earnest participant so far, you might have successfully offloaded your job and bid adieu to your dear ones. Now the grand finale awaits! It's high time to disconcert your remaining companions, so you can bask in the glory of your isolation and luxuriate in a pool of self-pity.
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    7 mins
  • 08 Lose your job and your loved ones!
    Feb 26 2022
    Until now, we've enlightened you with the fundamentals of rejection, demonstrated how to craft challenging predicaments for yourself, and imparted strategies to dodge any semblance of success. In today's episode, we're set to unveil how you can harness the robust energy of rejection to sever ties with your job and bid farewell to your beloved ones, ultimately achieving an enviable level of solitude.
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    7 mins

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