This week, Leanne and Orla share a raw and deeply moving story sent in by a listener — a woman who grew up in a home shaped by infidelity, neglect, and addiction, who became the caretaker of her younger siblings from childhood, and who is now, as an adult, looking after the very mother who failed her.

The girls talk about what it means to carry that kind of weight, the guilt and shame that comes with complex feelings toward a parent, and whether it's ever okay to say no. They introduce the concept of "lighthouses" — those rock-steady people in our lives who see us for who we truly are — and reflect on what it means to survive, to grow, and to finally be heard.

Orla also opens up about her own experience growing up as a mixed-race woman in Ireland in the 80s, facing racism and poverty, and the lighthouses who helped shape her into who she is today.

An honest, emotional, and ultimately empowering conversation. You are not alone.

Timecodes:

00:00 — Welcome & introducing this week's listener story

00:32 — The listener's story is read out — infidelity, neglect, and a childhood lost to responsibility

02:55 — "My ma is currently dying of cancer and I despise having to look after her"

03:27 — Orla & Leanne react — championing her strength and asking: is it okay to say no?

06:22 — Introducing the lighthouse concept — the people who are rock steady in our lives

07:28 — What it meant for her to finally get this off her chest

08:12 — Being the eldest daughter and the weight of responsibility

09:48 — Referencing Katrina O'Sullivan's Outside Mullingar — stories of poverty and resilience on stage

11:21 — These stories aren't unique — the hidden impact of adverse childhood experiences

12:52 — Stories lived vs. stories told — the importance of safety and no judgment

14:25 — Growth over comfort & giving yourself permission to say no

15:33 — Invitation to the listener to reach out or come on the show

17:20 — Survivors of life — what it means to watch people get over the hump

19:15 — We want to hear the real you — the difference between the smile you wore and what you truly felt

21:29 — Orla opens up about growing up mixed-race in 80s Ireland — racism, poverty, and identity

24:27 — Don't be quick to judge — you never know what someone is carrying

25:33 — Closing thoughts — a smile goes a long way

In this very first episode of How’s Your Ma?, hosts Leanne and Orla introduce the heart behind the podcast — real, honest conversations about female relationships in all their forms.

From mothers and daughters to friendships, loss, growth, and everything in between, they explore what it really means when someone asks, “How’s your ma?” — a simple question that can carry very different meanings depending on your story.

Leanne and Orla share their own experiences of motherhood, friendship, grief, and personal growth, while opening the door for others to share their stories too — even anonymously. This is a space for honesty, empowerment, and connection, where no story is too complicated and no voice goes unheard.

Whether your relationships are strong, strained, or somewhere in between — this podcast is for you.

⏱️ Timestamps

00:00 – 01:15
Introduction to Leanne & Orla and the idea behind How’s Your Ma?

01:15 – 02:02
The meaning behind the question “How’s your ma?” and why it can be complex

02:02 – 03:08
Different experiences of motherhood — loss, absence, and strong bonds

03:08 – 04:19
Creating a safe space for open, honest conversations

04:19 – 05:27
Anonymous storytelling and why sharing can feel safer

05:27 – 06:42
Empowering women and navigating today’s social pressures

06:42 – 08:16
Kindness, parenting, and raising the next generation

08:16 – 09:27
Life changes, growth, and finding stability in your 40s

09:27 – 10:21
Doing something for yourself and the joy of hearing people’s stories

10:21 – 11:44
Curiosity vs “being nosy” — the power of listening with care

11:44 – 12:48
Authenticity, honesty, and empowering others to grow

12:48 – 13:55
Self-worth, confidence, and not shrinking yourself

13:55 – 15:01
Making friends as adults & how Leanne and Oral met

15:01 – 16:22
Choosing friendship and building meaningful connections

16:22 – 17:31
Positivity, daily check-ins, and supporting each other

17:31 – 18:37
Personal growth and changing your mindset over time

18:37 – 20:02
Finding your voice and helping others through your work

20:02 – 21:27
Motherhood, influence, and raising confident children

21:27 – 22:36
Staying positive and creating a healthy mindset

22:36 – 23:31
Upcoming guests and sharing real-life stories

23:31 – 24:32
Women’s roles in society and changing expectations

24:32 – 25:35
Different perspectives within the same family

25:35 – 26:31
Encouraging listeners to share their stories — without judgment

Our podcast explores women’s relationships—from mother-daughter to leadership—and how they shape lives, aiming to support and empower women across all relationship experiences.