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Come Heck or High Laundry: Raising the Kids You Didn't Expect to Raise

Come Heck or High Laundry: Raising the Kids You Didn't Expect to Raise

Written by: Erin Burt
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Real talk for grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and close family friends raising a child they never expected to raise.

I'm Erin Burt. I said yes, then I hung up the phone and panicked. Now I'm in my sixties, raising kids from my family, and I've stood on both sides of the door. I'm a kinship caregiver and a Reverse Empty Nester, and I'm still in it, come heck or high laundry.

Every week I share what I lived, what I learned, and where to go for help. We talk about the call that changes everything, trauma and big feelings, autism and sensory needs, the lasting effects of drug exposure, IEP meetings, burnout, and the moments of joy that make it all worth it.

I'm not a therapist, a social worker, or a lawyer. I'm a woman who has lived the questions you're asking right now. No judgment. Ever.

Pull up a chair. The porch light's on.

Find more support, tools, and community at The Back Porch: www.backporchscore.com

© 2026 Come Heck or High Laundry: Raising the Kids You Didn't Expect to Raise
Episodes
  • No Caseworker. No Roadmap. Now What?

    No Caseworker. No Roadmap. Now What?
    Oct 13 2026

    You said yes. Now what?

    Maybe nobody official is involved and you're figuring it out on your own. Or maybe, like me, you had caseworkers, adoption workers, and psychologists, and still nobody showed you how the pieces fit together. Either way, you can end up at the kitchen table wondering what comes next.

    In this episode of 62 and 2 AM Feedings, I talk about:

    • Why most kinship families raise kids outside the foster care system
    • Child-only grants: money set aside for the child, where your own income usually doesn't count
    • Why a school and medical form isn't the same thing as custody
    • Kinship navigator programs, and how to find one by calling 211
    • Why you're the file now, and what I learned about keeping important papers safe after the Camp Fire

    Your one next step: make one call this week. Write down the date, who you talked to, and what they said.

    Mentioned in this episode:

    • Notice Them Grow (The Noticing Log): https://noticethemgrow.com
    • Fire-resistant document bag: https://link.amazon/B0b8QmAE9
    • Grandparents as Parents by Sylvie de Toledo and Deborah Edler Brown: https://link.amazon/B04PssrfC
    • The Back Porch, a community for kinship and relative caregivers: www.backporchscore.com

    As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

    I'm not a therapist, social worker, or lawyer. This episode shares my personal experience and general information, not legal, medical, or financial advice. Rules are different in every state, so check with your county or a qualified professional about your situation.

    Next week: the parenting that worked before, and why it might not work now.
    Show More Show Less
    5 mins
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