In this episode of Say it with Your Chest, Gbemi and Toolz tackle the age old question: Is intimacy about pleasure or performance? They explore the pressure to perform in bed, how society influences our expectations, and why mutual pleasure should be the main focus. With a candid discussion about communication, intimacy, and even a few fun "This or That" questions from Instagram followers, this episode is an honest conversation about how to truly enjoy intimacy with your partner.

Join Gbemi and Toolz as they break down the myths around performance anxiety and reveal how communication and connection are the real keys to a fulfilling intimate life. Plus, learn about Durex products designed to boost pleasure and confidence in the bedroom.

Tune in, #Sayitwithyourchest and let’s talk intimacy the right way!

00:00 - Intro
02:45 - Is Intimacy About Pleasure or Performance?
07:30 - Performance Pressure: The Societal Expectations
13:00 - Men vs. Women: Who Faces More Pressure?
17:45 - Fake It 'Til You Make It?
22:30 - Pressure vs. Pleasure
27:00 - This or That? Fun Listener Questions
32:15 - Durex Product Spotlight
36:00 - Closing Thoughts

In this special episode of Offair Air with Durex, Gbemi and Toolz are joined by the incredible Chidera aka Slumflower, a Sunday Times best-selling author, as they dive into the art of speaking your mind and owning your desires in relationships. With unfiltered honesty, they discuss how to confidently express your needs, especially when it comes to intimacy, and why it’s so important for both men and women to #SayItWithYourChest

Slumflower takes us through her journey as a dominatrix, sharing valuable insights on power dynamics, and how she navigates dominance and submission in a healthy and consensual way. Plus, get the inside scoop on her experiences in relationships and how to communicate what turns you on without fear, shame, or hesitation.

In partnership with Durex, this episode explores mutual pleasure, sexual confidence, and how both partners can truly understand each other’s needs in and out of the bedroom.

00:00 - Introduction: What Does It Mean to 'Say It With Your Chest'?
03:30 - Meet Slumflower: From Best-Selling Author to Dominatrix
07:00 - The Importance of Confidence in Communication
12:20 - Navigating Power Dynamics in Relationships
16:50 - Saying What You Want in Bed: How to Communicate Your Needs
22:00 - The Psychology of Men’s Submissive Tendencies
28:15 - Confidence, Consent, and Comfort: The Key to Great Sex
33:00 - Breaking Down Cultural Barriers: Owning Your Pleasure in Nigerian Society
39:30 - Sexual Exploration: How to 'Train' Your Partner (In a Fun Way)
44:00 - The Role of Praise: Why Men Love to Be Called 'Good Boy'
49:20 - Slumflower’s Take on Dominance, Submissiveness, and Consent
54:00 - A Conversation on Mutual Pleasure: Durex’s Role in Sexual Confidence
58:30 - Closing Thoughts: Speak Up, Own Your Desires, and Say It With Your Chest

In this episode of Say It With Your Chest, an OffAir mini-series brought to you by Durex, we talk intimacy, communication, confidence, protection, and the unspoken rules shaped by culture and judgement.

From women carrying condoms to awkward pharmacy moments, playlists, compliments, and why silence kills the vibe. Nothing is off-limits.

Join the conversation in the comments 👇
#SayItWithYourChest

Proudly powered by Durex.

00:00 – If I were president… more money, less traffic, better sex
02:08 – Who really sets the rules in the bedroom?
07:06 – Why society assumes men should lead sexually
11:46 – Silence, fear & the pressure on women
18:36 – Women carrying condoms: smart or scandalous?
24:19 – Pharmacy judgement, church leaflets & shame culture
32:14 – Should intimacy rules be discussed earlier?
40:18 – Compliments, playlists & setting the mood
53:44 – Final takeaways: comfort, confidence & consent

In this special episode of 'OffAir,' hosts Gbemi and Toolz, along with guest Yeside Olayinka Agboola, founder, Oloricoitus, delve into the intriguing world of kinks, fantasies, and sexuality in Nigeria. They define kinks and fantasies and discuss the contrasts between public conservatism and private liberalism in Nigerian attitudes towards sex. The episode highlights the booming industry of aphrodisiacs and sex enhancers, and the importance of communication, emotional security, and kindness in exploring sexual preferences with partners. Practical steps for safe exploration, such as testing and using condoms, are covered. The episode concludes with myth-busting statements about kinks and sexual communication and a detailed overview of Durex products designed to enhance sexual experiences. The hosts encourage viewers to explore their kinks and fantasies safely and communicate openly with their partners.
#SayItWithYourChest #OffAirXDurex

00:00 Introduction and Episode Overview
00:35 Defining Kinks and Fantasies
03:26 Exploring Nigerian Attitudes Towards Sex
05:38 Communicating Desires and Overcoming Insecurities
11:13 Safe Sex Practices and Misconceptions
13:20 Encouraging Exploration and Emotional Security
19:09 Myth Busters and Product Recommendations
22:23 Final Thoughts and Closing Remarks

In this episode of FX Files an OffAir Specials brought to you by Paga, we address a significant concern for Nigerians and Africans when traveling abroad, the frustration of having cards from Nigerian banks declined due to network issues or suspected fraud.

Our hosts, Gbemi And Toolz discuss the challenges of making payments overseas and introduce Paga's innovative solution. Paga US now allows anyone with a US residential address to open a fully regulated US bank account, offering physical and virtual Visa cards, and seamlessly integrate with services like Apple Pay and Google Pay.

The highlight of this special episode is an insightful conversation with the CEO of Paga, Tayo Oviosu who explains how the new service removes the hassle of traditional banking processes, enabling users to manage multiple currencies, send and receive money effortlessly, and maintain a strong financial link back home.

Tune in to learn how Paga is transforming banking for the African diaspora, making global financial transactions smoother and more accessible.

In this final episode of the season, Gbemi and Toolz discuss various hot topics including dating dynamics in today’s Nigeria with Nimi and Skuki Peeshaun, the challenges young professionals face, and insights on remote work. Highlights include a fan mail segment where a young listener seeks advice on handling financial pressures from her parents, debates on dating standards, emotional intelligence in relationships, and the impact of social media on dating. The episode also features a guest segment with Nadine, the market manager of GrabrFi, discussing the benefits of remote work and challenges like payment barriers for Nigerian freelancers. In addition, there's a special segment on the importance of sunscreen, particularly in Nigeria's intense sun, in collaboration with Beauty by Daz.

In this episode, the hosts cover a wide range of topics, from tech controversies and social media feuds to mental health, career advice, and personal growth.

Featuring special guests like Chude Jideonwo and Mommy Chop Life, the episode explores experiences with depression, relocating abroad, financial solutions, skincare tips, and navigating life’s challenges. Packed with candid stories, laughter, and practical advice, this episode is full of insights you won’t want to miss.

#OffAirWithGbemiAndToolz

In this special on-location episode, we take you inside Hairitage, one of Lekki’s most trusted hair-care salons — and honestly, the experience was nothing short of impressive. This wasn’t just a salon visit; it was a full masterclass on healthy hair, personalized treatments, and what it really means to care for your hair the right way.

Our hosts sat down with the Hairitage team and explored everything that makes the salon stand out, including:
✨ Open 7 Days a Week — perfect for busy women who can’t squeeze salon days into a tight schedule.
✨ A Healthy-Hair-First Philosophy — Hairitage isn’t just about styling; the entire approach is built around nurturing, repairing, and caring for your hair.
✨ Tailored Treatments — no one-size-fits-all here. Whether your hair needs protein, moisture, strengthening, or balance, they actually diagnose it and create a treatment plan just for you.
✨ Specialized Services — from post-relaxer repair to scalp health treatments and moisture/protein balancing, Hairitage offers niche, hard-to-find services in Lekki.
✨ Cute & Quirky Treatment Names — “Leave Me Tender,” “Pink Power,” and more — the branding alone makes the experience fun and memorable.
✨ Treatment-Based Trims — even something as simple as a trim becomes intentional, with stylists checking split ends to prevent breakage and protect length.
✨ Education at Every Step — You don’t just get your hair done; you leave with knowledge, tips, and a better understanding of your hair’s needs.

From expert insights to behind-the-scenes details, this episode highlights why Hairitage has quickly become a go-to haven for women who want more than just a hairstyle — they want healthy, thriving hair.

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