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Pause Purpose Play

Pause Purpose Play

Written by: Michaela Thomas
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About this listen

 Imagine if you could follow your ambition without drowning in it – how much more fulfilling life would be? That’s what Pause Purpose Play is all about – finding balance over burnout by setting you free from needing to be perfect, so that you can take action and get started with what matters to you, instead of getting stuck in procrastination and holding yourself back with self-limiting beliefs your inner critic tells you. In this podcast, Michaela Thomas, Clinical Psychologist, Couples Therapist and founder of The Thomas Connection, shares bite-sized learning around psychology of performance, habits, self-confidence, stress, anxiety, perfectionism, parenthood and couples relationships. The podcast will mix solo episodes with guest interviews; diving deep into their professional zone of genius and learning about how they have found pause, purpose and play in their life and in their work. My new book, The Lasting Connection, is available now from all good bookshops.Copyright 2020 All rights reserved. Economics Hygiene & Healthy Living Leadership Management & Leadership Psychology Psychology & Mental Health Self-Help Success
Episodes
  • Patriarchal pressure, perfectionism, and male allyship, with Lee Chambers

    Patriarchal pressure, perfectionism, and male allyship, with Lee Chambers
    Jan 29 2026

    If you’re an ADHD or neurodivergent woman, the pressure to be “acceptable” can feel relentless: capable but not chaotic, confident but not difficult, adaptable but not too much. This episode explores why patriarchy amplifies perfectionism for neurodivergent women - and how real male allyship can help reduce that pressure. One for your partner to listen to!

    Episode overview

    I’m joined by Lee Chambers, founder of Male Allies UK, to talk about what authentic male allyship actually looks like — beyond performative support or social media statements.

    We discuss:

    • Why perfectionism becomes a survival strategy for ADHD women

    • How patriarchal norms punish difference and reward masking

    • The invisible load of caregiving and emotional labour

    • How men can be allies without centring themselves or creating more work for women

    Why this matters

    Patriarchy doesn’t just disadvantage women - it narrows who we’re allowed to be. For neurodivergent women, that narrowing is sharper, harsher, and more exhausting.

    Reset

    If this conversation stirred something, tiredness, recognition, or that familiar “oh… it’s not just me”, you might benefit from Reset, my gentle, science-informed experience for women who are burning out from trying to hold it all together. It’s a chance to pause, soothe your nervous system, and reconnect with yourself - without needing to fix or improve anything first. www.thethomasconnection.co.uk/reset
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    1 hr and 3 mins
  • What your partner needs to know about ADHD

    What your partner needs to know about ADHD
    Jan 22 2026
    If you've been diagnosed with ADHD, and your partner wants to know how to better support you - this episode is for you. If ADHD is creating tension, misunderstandings, or repeated arguments in your relationship - this episode is also for you. In this solo episode, Clinical Psychologist Michaela Thomas shares what she would want a partner to understand if they were sitting together in the therapy room. This episode isn’t about excuses or blame. It’s about understanding how ADHD affects nervous systems, emotions, communication, and relationships — and what actually helps, rather than makes things worse. In this episode, we explore:
    • Why ADHD is not an excuse, but is an explanation
    • Why “trying harder” often leads to more shame and burnout, not change
    • What happens when someone with ADHD is stuck in rumination or emotional collapse
    • Why logic and reassurance don’t land when the nervous system is dysregulated
    • Rejection sensitivity (RSD) and how tone, silence, and facial expressions can be misread
    • How past relational wounds can be triggered in the present
    • The common “parent–child” dynamic that can develop in ADHD relationships
    • How to support your partner without taking over or eroding their agency
    A free resource for couples If this episode resonated, Michaela has created a free guide called Balance Your Relationship. It’s designed to help couples step out of blame and back into understanding — with compassion for both partners. Download the free guide here: http://thethomasconnection.co.uk/relationshipbalance/ The Thomas Connection Relationship Balance - The Thomas Connection Do you prioritise regularly checking in with your relationship to make sure everything is on track? A little like having a regular service on your car? I Estimated reading time 5 minutes
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    19 mins
  • Drug free ADHD, with Joseph Pack

    Drug free ADHD, with Joseph Pack
    Jan 15 2026

    In this episode of the Pause Purpose Play podcast, host Michaela Thomas welcomes Joseph Pack who discusses strategies for managing ADHD without medication.

    Joseph, founder of 'Drug-Free ADHD,' shares his journey of overcoming ADHD by focusing on lifestyle changes instead of medication. The conversation delves into various approaches, including breath work, cold and hot water exposure, diet adjustments, movement, and the critical importance of quality sleep.

    Joseph and Michaela emphasise that these methods are not meant to replace medication but to offer alternative solutions for those who cannot or choose not to use medication. The episode concludes by highlighting the need for a nuanced and individualised approach to ADHD management.

    Connect with Joseph:

    Website: www.drugfreeadhd.org

    Instagram: www.instagram.com/josephpackcom/
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    50 mins
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