The holidays are supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year. But what happens when they don't feel wonderful at all?

For some, this season brings joy, traditions, and time with the people they love.

For others, it's an empty chair. Complicated family relationships. Loneliness, even when surrounded by people. Or reminders of a life that looks different from the one they imagined.

And sometimes, it's a little bit of everything.

In this episode of People Untangled, Sandy Kaminski explores why the same holiday season can feel so different for each of us—and how our well-intentioned attempts to cheer someone up might not be as helpful as we think.

Because here's a question worth considering: When we rush to make someone feel better, whose discomfort are we actually trying to relieve?

We're all walking into the same season. But we're not all bringing the same life into it.

What's one thing you wish more people understood about this time of year?

Join the conversation and explore more episodes at https://www.peopleuntangled.com.

Let's untangle this.

You say yes when you want to say no. You show up, make the effort, and try not to disappoint anyone. Then you find yourself feeling resentful when other people don't do the same for you.

But what if the hardest person for a people pleaser to disappoint isn't everybody else? What if it's themselves?

In this episode of People Untangled, I'm admitting something about myself: I think I'm a people pleaser. Not because I can't speak my mind or stand up for myself, but because sometimes I care more about being liked, included, and valued than I'd like to admit.

We're pulling apart the guilt that comes with saying no, the invisible scoreboard we sometimes keep in relationships, and how our unspoken expectations can turn generosity into resentment.

We'll also explore why changing our behavior doesn't necessarily change what we believe about ourselves—and the complicated difference between being needed and being genuinely wanted.

Because maybe the challenge isn't just learning how to say no.

Maybe it's learning that we can say no and still be someone worth saying yes to.

Let's untangle this.

What's harder for you: saying no, or feeling guilty afterward?

Watch the video episode and explore more People Untangled conversations at https://www.peopleuntangled.com/podcast

Everyone knows who the problem is. So why is everyone else doing the adjusting?

In Episode 3 of People Untangled, Sandy Kaminski pulls the thread on what happens when one person’s behavior becomes everyone else’s responsibility—at work, in families, and in relationships.

The careful wording. The extra work. The things nobody says because they already know how that person will react.

When does keeping the peace start costing you too much?

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Watch the episode on YouTube:

https://youtu.be/ZP07ZJsjRhY

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Let’s untangle this.