Episodes

  • The Imperative Habit of Raising Conscious Young Men with Dave Rossi

    The Imperative Habit of Raising Conscious Young Men with Dave Rossi
    Jan 7 2026
    A deep dive into how Dave Rossi — entrepreneur turned mindfulness teacher and author of The Imperative Habit — reframes success, presence, and internal awareness for parents raising boys today. This episode explores how achievement culture shapes a boy’s identity, why inner peace matters more than winning, and how small daily rituals can help boys grow into grounded, self-aware young men. Dave brings practical habits, consciousness principles, and real-life insights that help families shift from performance to presence. Key Takeaways / Topics CoveredSpiritual vs. Animal Self – We all have two modes: survival-driven instincts (fear, jealousy, scarcity) vs. conscious choice anchored in logic and values. Growth is choosing the latter.Competition Should Elevate Everyone – When competition becomes about defeating others, it becomes poison — true winning is improving yourself.Model Courage, Not Control – Kids internalize what they see far more than what they are told. Demonstrate discipline, resilience, and presence. Treat Kids as Equals – Respect their autonomy; give information and let them choose, even when that means allowing struggle. Praise Courage Over Achievement – Strength is facing internal resistance — physical or emotional. That’s what creates self-mastery.Avoid Shame as a Motivator – Shame never produces growth. Pausing to reflect before reacting is a spiritual act.Suffering Has a Purpose – Often pain is the catalyst for transformation and discovering one’s true path. raising-men-podcast-recording-w…Timestamps / Chapter Markers00:44 (Introducing Dave Rossi, entrepreneur and author)01:14 The Fixed Pie vs. Variable Pie Mentality(Competition and abundance)03:09 The Squirrel Nut Theory(Hoarding vs. Spiritual Power)05:31 Redefining Winning(Improving from the experience vs. prevailing)06:40 The Paradox of Animal vs. Spirit(Cognition over instinct)07:53 Spiritual Self-Mastery(Mind over body signals)10:48 The Running Challenge(Cultivating mental override in a 6-year-old)12:42 The Spiritual Principle of Equality(Treating your son like a client/boss)14:26 Empowerment and the 40% Capacity Rule(Letting him choose the push)17:30 The Dangers of Parental Attachment and Shame(The need for his choice)19:52 Modeled Behavior as the Most Powerful Influence20:25 The Reflex to Shame and the Spiritual Act of Withdrawal23:14 The Two Brains: Conan vs. Sherlock Holmes24:26 Emotional Biometrics and the Sabre-Toothed Tiger26:30 Overcoming Programmed Fear(The bridge jumping example)28:55 Unconventional Parenting: Letting a Teenager Choose Risk31:22 Accountability and Acceptance of Consequences(The ADD example)33:45 Coping with Extreme Behavior(Addiction, empathy vs. compassion)37:04 The Lesson of Suffering(Letting a child hit rock bottom)41:19 The New Book on Healthy Masculinity(Shedding archetypes and masking)44:11 The Strength of Vulnerability(The boxer analogy)47:20 Building Muscle Memory(Behaving the way you want to be)48:01 Nietzsche and the Ubermensch(The tightrope walk to self-mastery)50:35 Cultivating Courage and Awareness(Praising courage over achievement)52:41 One Principle: Treat Your Children Like Equals54:19 Closing RemarksSupporting ContentBooks by Dave Rossi:The Imperative Habit: 7 Non-Spiritual Practices Towards Spiritual BehaviorAlphas Die Early (upcoming/new release mentioned in the podcast)Website: DaveRossiGlobal.comRelated books mentioned in the episode: Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor FranklJourney of Souls by Michael NewtonBookThe Imperative Habit: 7 Non-Spiritual Practices Towards Spiritual Behaviourhttps://bookshop.org/p/books/imperative-habit-7-non-spiritual-practices-towards-spiritual-behavior-for-happiness-health-love-and-success-dave-rossi/af5d3267632de76fKey Ideas from the Book (w/ Sources)Dave teaches seven non-spiritual habits that build spiritual behavior rooted in presence and self-awareness.https://bradkearns.com/dave-rossi-consciousness-spirituality-finding-happiness-from-within-and-what-brads-hiding-from-the-listening-audience/Examples include:Accept what is (Habit #1)Do not fear outcomes (Habit #2)Happiness as a state of being, not emotion https://bradkearns.com/dave-rossi-consciousness-spirituality-finding-happiness-from-within-and-what-brads-hiding-from-the-listening-audience/Dave’s personal story: multimillion-dollar entrepreneur who felt empty, leading to collapse, rebuilding, and inner discovery. https://theimperativehabit.comBlog theme: true happiness is internal; most people chase external validation unaware their “compass” is miscalibrated. https://www.daverossiglobal.com/public/learn/how-did-i-get-here/
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    55 mins
  • Lessons in Leadership, Tech, and Letting Go with Damian Gomes

    Lessons in Leadership, Tech, and Letting Go with Damian Gomes
    Dec 31 2025
    In this conversation, Shaun sits down with Damian Gomes — a father, technologist, and long-time Scout leader — to explore what it means to raise two sons who couldn’t be more different. From leading Boy Scouts and teaching leadership through failure to navigating remote schooling during the pandemic, Damian shares the lessons, struggles, and surprising gifts of modern fatherhood. One son thrived in self-paced learning and now builds AI systems with his dad; the other is still discovering his path through art and curiosity. Together, they reflect on letting kids fail safely, adapting parenting styles, and staying conscious and present even when patience runs thin.Key Takeaways / Topics CoveredLeadership Is Learned Through Chaos: Scouting teaches “storming, norming, performing” — a real-world model for how boys (and adults) learn to lead, adapt, and collaborate through trial and error.Independence Requires Letting Go: Damian’s older son thrived once school became self-paced. The hardest part was letting him fail, fall behind, and figure it out without rescuing him too early.Parent Each Child Differently: What worked for one son — freedom and code — failed for the other. Fatherhood isn’t a formula; it’s an evolving experiment in empathy and adaptation.Redefining Education and Failure: Damian learned that the goal of learning isn’t perfection but persistence. Retaking a failed quiz became a metaphor for life — you haven’t failed until you stop trying.Conscious Fatherhood Is a Daily Practice: His guiding principle: staying self-aware enough to choose a new reaction rather than repeating old patterns. That pause — between emotion and response — is where growth happens.Pull Quotes“You’re not just building automation systems — you’re helping two young men find their own operating systems for life.” — Shaun Dawson“If you give them the plan, what are they learning? Let them carry on tradition by word of mouth — that’s where the leadership happens.” — Damian Gomes“I’d rather my sons fail at home, with us around to help them, than discover they don’t have the skills later when it really matters.” — Damian Gomes00:35 Official Introduction01:41 Involvement and Value in Boy Scouts03:51 Cubmaster to Scout Leader: The Transition05:37 "Storming, Norming, and Performing" in Leadership09:52 Scouting's Offer to Modern Boys14:44 Contrived Structure for Organic Skills16:52 The Value of Inventing the Solution17:47 Doubling Down on Scouting During Challenges21:39 The Pandemic's Impact on Family Dynamics24:33 The Shift to Self-Paced Virtual Learning27:40 Rethinking Failure and Retaking Tests30:13 Homeschooling vs. Virtual School Decisions32:38 The Older Son's Success Story37:03 The Hardest Part: Allowing for Failure38:55 The Younger Son's Struggle for Structure42:26 The Future of Learning43:08 Hopes for Sons' Memories45:08 One Principle for Raising Men47:35 Closing RemarksSupporting ContentOrganizations & ConceptsBoy Scouts of America – emphasizing youth leadership and structured independence.YPT (Youth Protection Training) – mandatory training for all Scout leaders.EDGE Method – Explain, Demonstrate, Guide, Enable — a Scouting framework for mentorship and teaching.Education & TechFlorida Virtual School – one of the first large-scale online K–12 programs mentioned in the episode.Duval Virtual Instruction Academy – Damian’s local district’s virtual learning platform.Automation Watchdog – Damian and his son’s company, building systems that verify automation and AI performance.Mark Rober’s YouTube Channel – inspiration for Damian’s younger son’s curiosity in science and engineering.Open Source Software Movement – central to his son’s learning and development path.Books & Ideas“Mindset: The New Psychology of Success” by Carol S. Dweck – on learning through growth and persistence.“The Conscious Parent” by Dr. Shefali Tsabary – echoes Damian’s principle of awareness and conscious parenting.“The Scoutmaster’s Other Handbook” by Mark A. Ray – practical modern guide to leadership and youth development through Scouting.
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    48 mins
  • The Psychology of Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys with Dr. Daniel Singley

    The Psychology of Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys with Dr. Daniel Singley
    Dec 24 2025
    In this thoughtful and often funny conversation, Dr. Daniel Singley—founder of The Center for Men’s Excellence and creator of MenExcel—joins Shaun to unpack what it really means to raise emotionally healthy boys in a rapidly changing world. Together, they explore how traditional models of masculinity can evolve without abandoning strength, why fatherhood is the “tip of the spear” for redefining what it means to be a man, and how dads can model emotional resilience and connection in everyday life.Dr. Singley shares evidence-based insights on the transition from “dude to dad,” the power of emotional flexibility, and the importance of community for fathers. This episode is a practical and deeply human look at how we can raise sons—and become men—of both heart and strength.Key Takeaways / Topics Covered1. Masculinity isn’t under attack—it’s under construction. Healthy masculinity requires flexibility, not rigidity; the ability to be strong in some contexts and empathetic in others.2. Fatherhood is the frontline of modern manhood. Early involvement during pregnancy and infancy predicts stronger emotional connection, better outcomes for children, and greater well-being for fathers.3. Emotional literacy is courage, not weakness. When fathers model emotional awareness—naming their feelings, owning their mistakes—they teach their sons that vulnerability is strength.4. Community is critical for men’s mental health. Isolation is as damaging as smoking a pack a day; fathers need intentional friendships and spaces to be honest with other dads.5. Kindness is strength. Dr. Singley’s parting message: “Have the strength to be kind”—because cruelty often stems from fear, and choosing compassion is an act of real courage.Timestamps / Chapter Markers00:00 Introduction: Cultivating Strength and Sensitivity in Raising Boys01:18 Dr. Singley's Journey: Why Study the Psychology of Men and Fatherhood?03:08 The Consequence of Ignoring Cisgender Masculinity in Academia05:33 The Rising Tide: Empowering Men and Boys Doesn't Harm Other Genders06:55 Is Masculinity a Problem? Under Attack or Under Construction?07:54 The Core Issue: Rigidity in Traditional Masculine Roles09:11 The Benefits of Flexibility: Longevity, Relationships, and Mental Health10:45 Addressing the Pushback: The "Pussification" of the American Male13:43 Finding a Balanced Vision: Serving Yourself vs. Holding Yourself Back16:39 Workplace Benefits of Balanced Masculinity (Strengths with Heart)18:22 The "Fair Play" Card Exercise and Its Role in Domestic Roles20:21 Early Fatherhood: Why It's the "Tip of the Spear" for Contemporary Masculinity23:46 Fatherhood as an Opportunity to Cultivate Caregiving Muscles25:40 Key Predictors for Father Involvement: Pregnancy and Co-Parent Support27:48 The Vicious/Virtuous Cycle of Co-Parenting Support29:04 Shaun's Story: The "No Divorce for a Year" Deal31:17 Shaun's Story: Catching Inflexibility in Action (Kissing His Son)32:22 Equating Physicality with Sexuality (and Its Impact on Parenting)34:10 Parenting with Intention: Be Thoughtful, Not on Autopilot36:24 Practical Tools: The 10-Year Vision and Modeling Behavior38:20 The Greatest Gift: Owning Mistakes and Naming Underlying Emotions41:30 Upgrading Your OS: Why Flexibility is Essential for Modern Men42:59 Navigating the Extremes: The Paradox of Ideological Purity47:10 Reflections on Fatherhood: What Dr. Singley Did Right49:27 The One Step: Overcoming Isolation and Building Community51:13 The Hidden Danger: Loneliness and the Anxiety of "Bro-Dating"54:41 Closing Principle: Have the Strength to Be Kind56:16 Outro and ConclusionSupporting Content & ReferencesCenter for Men’s Excellence – Dr. Singley’s organization focused on men’s mental health and father-inclusive psychology https://www.menexcel.comAmerican Psychological Association, Division 51: Society for the Psychological Study of Men and Masculinity https://www.apa.org/about/division/div51Fair Play by Eve Rodsky – referenced for practical tools in balancing domestic roles https://www.fairplaylife.comStrengths with Heart by Tom Rath (referenced in discussion on leadership and empathy) https://www.strengthswithheart.comUS Surgeon General’s Report on Loneliness and Social Isolation (2023) – cited in Dr. Singley’s point about community and health https://www.hhs.gov/surgeongeneral/priorities/loneliness/index.html
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    57 mins
  • Real Talk on Fatherhood, Marriage, and Mayhem with Sean Harvey

    Real Talk on Fatherhood, Marriage, and Mayhem with Sean Harvey
    Dec 17 2025

    In Part Two, Sean reflects on losing his stepfather and guiding his sons through grief, legacy, and growth. He shares stories of finding laughter in pain, of writing a eulogy that helped him truly understand the man who raised him, and of passing those lessons forward. Together, Shaun and Sean unpack how fathers can model empathy, resilience, and strength through vulnerability—and why raising sons of character starts with being honest about our own humanity.

    Key Takeaways / Topics Covered

    1. Grief is a teacher — How fathers can lead their families through loss with honesty and calm strength.
    2. Model before you teach — Kids copy what they see; your actions are the real lesson.
    3. Empathy is legacy — Raising sons who choose kindness and courage in a noisy world.
    4. Humor heals — Laughter and humility are part of resilience.
    5. Love is conditional in effort, not worth — Sean reminds that love is deep, but accountability still matters.
    “You just have to try—that’s fatherhood. Trying, failing, and trying again.” —
    Sean Harvey


    “Whatever they see you do—that’s who they’ll become.” —
    Shaun Dawson


    “Life’s too short to ruin someone else’s day. It feels better to make it better.” —
    Sean Harvey


    “I don’t do unconditional love in behavior. You’ve still got to do right by people.” —
    Sean Harvey


    Supporting Content

    • The Kids Are Sleep podcast: https://thekidsaresleeppod.com/
    • Instagram (Sean): https://www.instagram.com/therealseanharvey/

    Timestamps / Chapter Markers

    00:00 Cultivating Understanding: Communicating Why We Push Our Kids (The Right-Hand Layup)
    03:22 The Challenge of Independence: Figuring Out the "Redo" for the Second Child
    05:46 The Genetics and The Goals: Tall Parents, Athletic Potential, and Non-Athletic Kids
    09:22The Asset vs. Liability: Getting Young Girls into Sports
    11:24 The Specialization Trap: Dealing with Pressure from Club Sports
    14:34 Courage in Vulnerability: What Motivates Sharing the "Messy Life" of Parenting
    17:07 The Identity Shift: From Political Satire/Rapper to Public Fatherhood
    21:28 The Strength of Vulnerability: The Castle Metaphor and Letting People In
    23:31 The True Measure of Success: How Well Kids Do Once They Leave
    24:20 Values to Instill: Hard Work, Compassion, and Conditional Love
    26:49 Managing the Tension: Unconditional Love vs. Raising Independent Adults
    28:22 The "College Hair" Conversation: Comforting Kids vs. Facing Reality
    30:10 Advice for Failing Dads: Keep Trying, Keep Failing (The Road to Excellence)
    31:54 The Difficult Talk: Using Chess to Broach Uncomfortable Topics with His Son
    34:00 The Most Important Example: Showing Sons How to Love and Respect Their Mother
    35:51 Excellence is Failure: Why You Must Embrace Continuous Failure in Fatherhood
    37:42 The Core Principle: How to Raise Powerful, Compassionate Men – "Don't Be a Dick"
    40:03 The Power of Childhood Humiliation: A Puddle of Pee and the Iconoclastic Path
    43:10 The Ripple Effect: Why Good Deeds and Positivity are the True Source of Empowerment
    45:20 Breaking the Cycle: Not Raising Kids Who "Were Raised by a Dick"
    47:35 The Small Act of Kindness: The Calculus of Holding a Door
    49:26 Conclusion: The Value of a Mother's Love and Early Loss
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    53 mins
  • No Perfect Dads Allowed: The Truth About Love and Showing Up with Sean Harvey

    No Perfect Dads Allowed: The Truth About Love and Showing Up with Sean Harvey
    Dec 10 2025
    In this first half of our conversation, The Kids Are Sleep co-host Sean Harvey joins Shaun to talk about the messy, meaningful side of marriage and modern fatherhood. From late-night talks with his wife Shannon to the daily rhythm of keeping love alive while raising two boys, Sean opens up about what real connection looks like when life gets chaotic. They explore how humor, honesty, and presence keep a family grounded—and how redefining masculinity starts at home.Key Takeaways / Topics CoveredConnection is daily work — Sean and Shannon intentionally sit down together every night to talk and decompress.Presence over perfection — Fatherhood is about showing up, not having it figured out.Evolving masculinity — Redefining strength through gentleness, humor, and communication.Raising sons means modeling love — Kids learn how to love and respect by what they witness between their parents.Balance is the new success — True fatherhood integrates ambition, love, and emotional awareness.“If you don’t sit down together every day, you risk losing your connection—and that’s when things start to drift.” — Sean Harvey“You can’t quit being a dad. So if you can’t stop, you just keep trying.” — Shaun Dawson“Our kids learn how to love by watching how we love their mother.” — Sean Harvey“Once I realized there weren’t many masculine, public fathers, I knew there was value in showing that side of myself.” — Sean HarveyTimelines00:00 Introduction: Sean Harvey and The Kids Are Sleep Podcast01:02 Inspiration: The Show Was Born from Post-COVID Couple Laughter02:57 Marriage Dynamics: Having Each Other's Backs vs. Ribbing Each Other04:22Marriage Seasons: Friendship vs. Transactional Partnership (Especially with Kids)05:00 Parenting Strategy: Why You Can't Undermine Your Partner06:08 The Kids are Ingenious: How Children Exploit Cracks in the Routine07:05 Discussing the Joy and Planning of Children (Gender Preferences)08:55 The Terror of a Teenage Girl vs. Early Troubles with Boys10:13 Balancing Kids, Marriage, and Self: The Need for Late-Night Space12:25 Risking It All: Why Constant Daily Connection is Crucial for Marriage13:08 The WFH Dynamic: Learning How to Share Space and Not Kill Each Other14:36 The Beard Principle: Optimizing for What Your Partner Wants16:23 The Unorthodox Childhood: How a Dream-Chasing Father Shaped Sean18:56 The Sacrifice of Excellence: Choosing Family Over Journeyman Fame19:26 Parallel Story: A World-Class Sportscaster Father and the Cost of Excellence23:04 The Moment of Realization: Seeing His Dad Through New Eyes in Portland27:14 The Generational Divide: Confronting Fatherhood in the Modern Era28:42 Finding Balance: The Next Generation of Parenting29:38 New Threats: Why Fathers Must Be More Present Than Ever30:51 Tech Gap: Kids' Savvy vs. The "Turn It Off and On Again" Rule32:00 Dealing with Loss: Announcing a Close Family Death to Children34:56 The Grieving Process: Observing Kids Looking for Emotional Cues35:58 Coping with Loss: The Life Lesson of Normalcy After Death37:42 A Story of Empathy and Normalcy: Going to Work After Losing a Parent40:00 Coping Mechanisms: The Power of Humor and Levity in Trauma41:05 The Tension: Joking About Seriousness to Retain Poignancy42:17 The Final Interaction: A New Coming-of-Age Threshold44:08 The Pressure Motivator: Writing the Eulogy the Day Before46:15 Intergenerational Realization: The "Asshole" Dad Who Asked Too Many Questions47:19 The Final Challenge: How to Cultivate Understanding in Our Kids NowSupporting ContentThe Kids Are Sleep podcast: https://thekidsaresleeppod.com/Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2BLqNnuXNGpzCioZOlzKsMApple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-kids-are-sleep/id1678661363Instagram (Sean): https://www.instagram.com/therealseanharvey/Instagram (Shannon): https://www.instagram.com/therealshannonharvey
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    48 mins
  • From Dudes to Dads: Redefining Modern Fatherhood with Eli Weinstein

    From Dudes to Dads: Redefining Modern Fatherhood with Eli Weinstein
    Dec 3 2025

    In this conversation, Eli Weinstein unpacks the emotional journey men go through as they shift from “just a guy” to a present, grounded, emotionally intelligent dad. Drawing from his work as a therapist, author, and host of The Dude Therapist, Eli breaks down the fears, expectations, and heart-level responsibilities that come with modern fatherhood — and how men can rise to them with honesty, humility, and strength. His new book, Dudes to Dads, gives fathers a roadmap to show up with clarity and connection in the moments that matter most.

    Topics Covered

    1. The emotional transition from “dude” to fully engaged father — what men often struggle with but rarely say out loud.
    2. Modern masculinity and mental health — unlearning the silence of past generations and building new patterns of emotional strength.
    3. Key insights from Dudes to Dads — identity shifts, communication, and redefining what support looks like.
    4. The role of fathers in raising emotionally grounded sons — modeling vulnerability, presence, and healthy expression.
    5. Practical, everyday habits for better connection — tools men can start using today to strengthen their relationships and parenting.
    "Fatherhood isn’t about having the answers — it’s about being willing to show up while you find them.


    “We have to stop treating emotions like the enemy. They’re the roadmap to deeper connection.


    “Your kids don’t need a perfect dad; they need a present one.”


    Timestamps

    00:00 - Introduction: Ellie Weinstein & the Book

    04:41 - Why the Book Was Written

    07:45 - Relationship Strain After Kids

    11:41 - Paternal Postpartum Anxiety

    13:05 - Male Vulnerability & Societal Pressure

    15:01 - Masculinity and True Strength

    21:20 - Raising Sons with Emotional Honesty

    27:19 - The Import/Export Home Culture Tool

    33:52 - The Dude-to-Dad Transition

    37:43 - Interdependence vs. Losing Self

    41:33 - Sharing Hobbies with Kids

    43:47 - How to Connect with Eli

    44:54 - One Final Principle

    47:10 - Closing Thoughts


    Topics, Books & Ideas Linked


    Dudes to Dads (Book): https://www.elivation.org/dudes-to-dads
    The Dude Therapist Podcast: https://www.elivation.org/the-dude-therapist-podcast
    Apple Podcast Link: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-dude-therapist/id1523217780
    Spotify Podcast Link: https://open.spotify.com/show/0lQzVztPzPN8ZOcN0X2w1S
    ELIvation Website: https://www.elivation.org
    Emotional Fitness Concepts (Blog & Resources): https://www.elivation.org/blog
    General Resources Page: https://www.elivation.org/resources
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    44 mins
  • Fathers Who Heal Lead Better: Dr. Michelle Watson on Raising Connected Dads

    Fathers Who Heal Lead Better: Dr. Michelle Watson on Raising Connected Dads
    Nov 26 2025
    In this conversation, Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield shares her insights on the unique dynamics between fathers and daughters, emphasizing the importance of emotional connection and communication. She discusses practical tools for fathers to improve their relationships with their children, particularly daughters, and highlights the significant influence fathers have on their children's emotional health. The conversation also touches on the challenges fathers face in understanding and responding to their children's emotional needs, and the necessity of self-regulation in parenting.Key Takeaways / Topics CoveredNever underestimate the power of your presence. Every area of a child’s life improves when they feel connected to their father. Presence — not perfection — is what transforms kids.Connection > Correction. Heart-level connection opens the drawbridge. Correction without connection triggers defensiveness and shutdown. Regulate yourself first. If you’re at an 8, 9, or 10 internally, that’s your old story firing — not your child’s fault. Calm your nervous system before responding.Ask questions that open the heart, not interrogate it. Use “I’m wondering…” + who/what/when/where/how + key/last-word questions to help kids talk and feel understood. Drop your anger. Dr. Michelle said dads must “drop anger” — not just control it — because anger closes the drawbridge and disconnects kids.Principle #1:“Never underestimate the power of your presence as a father.” Connection is what changes everything — not getting it perfect. Principle #2:“Drop your anger.” Not just manage it — drop it. When anger leads, connection dies.Practical tips1. Use bilateral stimulation to calm down. Tap your legs left–right (“going on a bear hunt”) or go for a walk to get out of fight/flight/freeze. 2. Use “I’m wondering…” to soften tough conversations. Example: “I’m wondering what was going on for you today?” This instantly opens your child's heart rather than triggering defensiveness. 3. Use who/what/when/where/how (avoid “why”) Pair it with the key word or last word your child said to keep conversations flowing.4. Write sticky notes or mirror notes. A simple “Have a great day” from dad becomes a lifelong identity seed. Women especially internalize written encouragement. 5. If estranged: start a dated “time capsule journal”. Write entries to your child so they can one day see you never stopped showing up emotionally. 6. Expand your “window of tolerance”. Especially for daughters who talk more — slow down, listen more, and tolerate messiness. Pull Quotes1. “Never underestimate the power of your presence as a father.” 2. “Men would rather do nothing than do it wrong… but doing nothing is doing it wrong.”Timestamps / Chapter Markers00:07 Intro & Meeting Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield01:46 The Unique Dynamic of Dads and Daughters03:00 Turning the Hearts of Fathers to Their Daughters05:20 Similarities and Differences in Raising Sons vs. Daughters06:20 How Daughter Relationships Benefit All Your Relationships07:49 The Castle Metaphor: Strength vs. Enclosure09:59 Why Men Freeze: Doing Nothing vs. Doing it Wrong12:15 Action Figures: The Need for Dads to Take Action13:00 Understanding the Freeze Response (Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn)14:38 Calming Techniques: Getting Out of the Activated Nervous System16:53 Conan the Barbarian Brain vs. Sherlock Holmes Brain18:54 Identifying Your "Old Stuff" (Triggers)23:45 Genetics and Gender: Why Daughters Need More Listening25:36 Venusian Communication: Figuring Things Out by Talking26:58 Example: Co-Regulating a Child's Meltdown32:27 The Intentionality Trap: Why We Think Kids are Lying35:20 Practical Tool: Using Who, What, When, Where, How40:41 Practical Tool: The Power of "I'm Wondering..."43:32 Practical Tool: Writing Notes on Mirrors46:58 The Love Bank: 5 Deposits to 1 Withdrawal48:42 The Guiding Principle for Fathers49:20 Never Underestimate the Power of Your Presence51:47 Don't Respond in Anger: Drop Your Anger53:38 Closing & Where to Find Dr. MichelleSupporting ContentLet’s Talk: Conversation Starters for Dads and Daughters https://www.bethanyhouse.com/9780764235689/lets-talk/Dad, Here’s What I Really Need From You https://drmichellewatson.com/books/The Dad Whisperer Podcast https://drmichellewatson.com/podcast/The Abba Project https://drmichellewatson.com/the-abba-project/Dr. Michelle Watson Canfield – Website https://drmichellewatson.com/The Female Brain — Louann Brizendine https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/19178/the-female-brain-by-louann-brizendine-md/Connect with Dr. Michelle Watson-CanfieldWebsite: drmichellewatson.comFacebook: facebook.com/drmichellewatsonInstagram: @michellejwatson + @thedadwhispererpodcastX: @mwatsonphdLinkedIn: Dr. Michelle Watson CanfieldYouTube: @thedadwhisperer
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    54 mins
  • What It Really Means to Be a Whole Man with Christopher Veal

    What It Really Means to Be a Whole Man with Christopher Veal
    Nov 12 2025

    In this episode of Raising Men, host Shaun Dawson sits down with Christopher Veal — author of The Whole Man: Evolving Masculinity, Marine veteran, and host of The Vulnerable Man Podcast — to explore what it really means to be a “whole man.” Together, they unpack the myths of masculine strength, the courage behind vulnerability, and how fathers can model emotional integrity for their kids.


    Key Takeaways

    1. True strength isn’t in the walls we build. Masculinity isn’t about armor or control — it’s about creating space where life and connection can thrive.
    2. Healthy masculinity lives in the ‘both/and.’ Real manhood blends courage and compassion. It’s not dominance or softness — it’s the balance of both.
    3. Vulnerability is leadership. Showing emotion or admitting mistakes doesn’t weaken fathers — it builds trust and emotional safety for sons.
    4. Fathers shape emotional literacy. Boys learn more from what we model than what we say. Our responses to fear, love, and failure teach manhood.
    5. Legacy is wholeness, not perfection. The “whole man” integrates every side of himself — strong yet open, firm yet kind. That’s what our sons remember.

    Pull Quotes

    “We’ve built castles so strong no one can break in — but nothing can grow inside either.” — Shaun Dawson


    “Vulnerability isn’t weakness. It’s the courage to be seen, especially by the ones who look up to us.” — Christopher Veal


    “Our sons don’t need one version of masculinity — they need the full spectrum of what being human looks like.” — Shaun Dawson



    Timestamps / Chapter Markers
    00:00 – 02:45 – Intro: male vulnerability & authentic friendships
    02:45 – 05:30 – Masculinity & societal pressures
    05:30 – 08:10 – Vulnerability and strength in high-pressure environments
    08:10 – 11:05 – Fatherhood: teaching through action
    11:05 – 14:00 – Self-awareness, ego, and confidence vs. arrogance
    14:00 – 17:20 – Excellence vs. perfection
    17:20 – 20:05 – Learning from failure & embracing mistakes
    20:05 – 22:50 – Connecting emotionally with other men
    22:50 – 25:00 – Going second: showing openness to build trust
    25:01 – 28:15 – Father figures & cross-cultural influences
    28:16 – 31:45 – Grace in parenting & male friendships
    31:46 – 34:30 – Confronting flaws & modeling honesty
    34:31 – 37:50 – Navigating polarized cultural narratives
    37:51 – 41:00 – Fostering meaningful male connections
    41:01 – 44:15 – Practical advice: self-awareness & intentionality
    44:16 – 47:30 – Key takeaways & lessons learned
    47:31 – End – Closing remarks & final encouragement


    🔗 Supporting Content & Resources

    Book: The Whole Man: Evolving Masculinity by Christopher Veal Explores how men can integrate vulnerability and emotional intelligence into leadership and fatherhood.
    Podcast: The Vulnerable Man Podcast Christopher’s ongoing conversations with men about courage, leadership, and emotional truth.

    Further Reading Mentioned:

    • Daring Greatly by Brené Brown — Understanding vulnerability as the birthplace of courage and connection.
    • The Mask of Masculinity by Lewis Howes — On breaking emotional armor and redefining male strength.
    • The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida — Classic work on balancing masculine energy with openness.
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    53 mins