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NB - language warning for this one. There’s a few F💣

In this episode, I share a client story about what happened when an unexpected message from an ex arrived around Christmas, and tipped something she thought was healed.

I share the process we used together to slow it down, name what had been activated, and write a response that was honest rather than “nice.”

I talk through:

• Why messages from ex-partners can land so powerfully, even years later
• Writing a polite reply versus a truthful one
• How writing it all out can bring clarity, release, and self-trust
• Attachment patterns as context and an invitation for healing, not excuses
• When compassion turns into self-abandonment
• And how closure is something we create, not something we’re given
  
  

The episode includes a fictionalised reading of the letter she wrote - emotionally true, but anonymised and blended to protect identity.

If you’re struggling to let go or wondering about your ex. Maybe been activated by an unexpected message or meeting, and wondered why it affected you more than expected, this episode is for you.

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

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In this final episode of the year, I’m sharing a powerful set of reflection questions to help you look back with compassion, honour your growth, and step into 2026 with clarity and intention.

Whether you’re navigating separation, divorce, co-parenting, identity shifts, or simply a season of change, these reflecton prompts will help you understand yourself more deeply, release what no longer serves you, and choose what comes next.

Reflect. Release. Reset.

Download your copy of the reflection questions HERE

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a text

In this episode, we explore the moment you quietly realise you can’t carry the relationship alone anymore.

You’ll hear:
• What the “quiet exit” actually looks like
• How belief without change becomes burnout
• Why hope without action becomes a cage
• The moment you stop trusting in his potential and start loving yourself more
• What to do when you’ve been over-functioning to his under-functioning
• The next steps when you're done, tired, and stepping into clarity

If you feel this… if you know this… if this is you... or it's becoming you... this episode is your reminder that you’re not cold, crazy, or asking too much.

You’re honouring yourself.

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a text

In this episode, Sallyanne talks about the activating or triggering comments that can come your way during separation or divorce. Even before you separate.

You’ll learn practical, grounded ways to respond (rather than react) without spiralling, without defending yourself, and without giving away your power.

We explore:
• Why these comments land so deeply
• How to separate their words from your worth
• Clear, simple boundary-based responses you can use immediately
• How to shift from being reactive to being anchored and self-led

This episode helps you stay steady, reclaim your emotional space, and stop letting your ex’s words pull you back into an old version of yourself.

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a text

Things I’ve Learned Solo Travelling Since My Divorce

Solo travel after divorce hits differently.

It’s equal parts freedom and fear, excitement and vulnerability.

You’re no longer part of a “we,” and sometimes, that absence echoes but there’s also something quietly powerful about that.

You’re choosing yourself. Your own adventure. Your own rhythm.

In this episode I share a few things I’ve learned solo travelling since my divorce - things that made the experience richer, easier, and at times, unexpectedly healing.

NB: After recording, I realised I forgot to include the most important piece: First and foremost… choose a destination and accommodation where you can be and feel safe. In every sense — emotionally, physically, and financially. All your other decisions come from there.

If you’re ready (or would like in the future) to explore the world - and yourself - on your own terms, this episode is for you.

Perfect For:
Women (and anyone) navigating life after divorce who are curious about solo travel, self-discovery, and reclaiming joy and freedom.

Listen if you want:

• Inspiration to take your first (or next) solo trip.
• Practical, down-to-earth tips for travelling safely and joyfully alone.
• Reflection on how travel can be a tool for healing and self-reconnection.

Where to next?

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a text

What I Know About Divorce Now, That You Can't Know Yet.

In this episode, I share everything I know about life after divorce that you simply can’t know until you live it. My own lived experience and that of my clients.

From the duality of grief and gratitude, to the quiet freedoms and small joys that only come when you reclaim your life, this is a reflection on integration, self-compassion, and choosing yourself.

What I would have done more and less of, the lessons I wish I knew earlier, and how time (combined with doing your work) transforms pain into possibility.

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a text

Are you wondering whether to stay in your relationship? Or thinking about finally leaving your marriage?

Often my clients come to me questioning “good enough” relationships where nothing feels catastrophically or dramatically wrong, but something still feels off.

In this episode, I lead you through 10 powerful questions designed to help you see clearly whether your relationship is serving your growth, your happiness, and your future.

If you’re stuck in indecision, this episode will help you stop overthinking, start reflecting, and make the choice that honours both your heart and your future.

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.

Send us a text

Navigating separation, uncertainty, and emotional overload during the holidays — without guilt, shame, or pressure.

The holidays are supposed to be a wonderful joyful time of the year. But what if your relationship is falling apart, already over, or hanging by a thread?

In this episode, Sallyanne talks honestly about the emotional weight of Christmas when you’re navigating separation, divorce, or deep relationship doubt.

We unpack the pressure of holiday “shoulds” - the expectations to keep things cheerful, stay together “for the kids,” or maintain appearances - and offer real talk, validation, and guidance for doing things differently this year.

Whether you’re quietly questioning your relationship or deep in the mess of divorce, this episode is here to help you feel less alone and more empowered.

BOOK A CLARITY CONSULT with Sallyanne

2 online coaching sessions with full messaging support between sessions

Designed to get you through the holidays easefully, intentionally and without feeling the pressure to have it all together.

Sallyanne Hartnell - Divorce Coach & Strategist

• How you can work with me
• Book a free intro call
• Join the waitlist for my group program Decide & Thrive
• Free Resources & Downloads
  - Choose You Guidebook
  - Having Hard Conversations - done for you scripts
  - Divorce with Less Drama - The Masterclass

Follow me on INSTAGRAM

All relationships are welcomed and supported at Reflect Coaching 🏳️‍🌈

This podcast is recorded on the land of the Wurundjeri people, the Traditional Custodians of this Land & its first story tellers. I pay respect to the Elders both past and present of the Kulin Nation & to any First Nations people listening.

Please note: all podcast content is general information only, not legal advice or information. Please seek specialist advice to support you & your unique circumstances.