In this episode, we unpack one of the most disorienting manipulation tactics of all: the victim complex.

This is what happens when accountability is twisted into persecution — when the person causing harm positions themselves as the one who’s been wronged, and you’re left carrying the blame, the guilt, and the public narrative.

We explore how narcissistic individuals use the victim role to:

• Avoid responsibility

• Control the story

• Recruit sympathy and allies

• Recast themselves as “misunderstood” while portraying you as cruel, unstable, or abusive

You’ll learn how this tactic shows up and why it’s so effective at making reasonable people question themselves.

Most importantly, we talk about how to recognize when this is happening, how to stop engaging in the cycle, and how to stay grounded when someone is committed to seeing themselves as the victim no matter the evidence.

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking, “How did I become the bad guy when I was just telling the truth?” — this episode is for you.

There’s a reason conversations with certain people go nowhere.

In this upcoming episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on the victim complex — a pattern where correction is received as cruelty, and accountability sounds like abuse. We’ll explore how narcissistic personalities weaponize their own pain to escape responsibility, rewrite the truth, and re-center themselves as the wounded party.

If you’ve ever walked away from a confrontation feeling like you were the villain for simply telling the truth… this one’s for you.

Coming this Wednesday on Set Apart + Called. Make sure you’re subscribed — and don’t forget to share with someone who needs to hear it.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENTS INSIDE

Gaslighting isn’t confusion — it’s conditioning.It’s when someone repeatedly denies your reality, rewrites what happened, and slowly trains you to doubt your own memory, instincts, and emotions.

In Episode 32 of the Manipulation Tactics series, we break down how gaslighting actually works, why it’s so psychologically destabilizing, and how it keeps people trapped in cycles of self-blame, second-guessing, and emotional dependence.

If you’ve ever found yourself thinking“Maybe I’m overreacting…”“Maybe I remembered it wrong…”“Maybe it really is my fault…”this episode will help you see why that voice was never yours to begin with.

🎧 Listen now to understand how gaslighting operates, how it shows up in narcissistic abuse and toxic relationships, and how to start trusting your own reality again.

And yes — important updates about the show and upcoming episodes are shared inside.

Projection is one of the most disorienting manipulation tactics — because it turns their behavior into your supposed flaw. In this episode, we break down how narcissists use projection to dodge accountability, rewrite reality, and keep you on the defensive.

You’ll learn how projection shows up in high-conflict relationships, why it’s rooted in deep psychological and spiritual distortion, and how it conditions you to question your own character. We also explore the real reason they accuse you of the very things they’re doing: it protects the image they’re desperate to maintain.

If you’ve ever been blamed for being “selfish,” “controlling,” or “dishonest” by the person actually exhibiting those behaviors, this episode will help you finally understand what’s happening — and why it’s not about you.

Recognize it. Name it. And step out of the trap.

When you hold a narcissist accountable, the conversation doesn’t move toward clarity — it reroutes. In this episode, we break down deflection: the tactic that turns your valid concern into a brand-new argument, a distraction, or an attack on your character.

We explore why accountability feels threatening to narcissists, how they shift the spotlight to avoid responsibility, and the emotional toll this takes on you. If you’ve ever walked away wondering, “How did we end up talking about my tone instead of their behavior?” — this episode will finally give you language for that moment.

Learn how to recognize deflection in real time, stay grounded in the truth, and stop absorbing blame that was never yours.

DARVO — Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender — is one of the most common and most disorienting manipulation tactics survivors encounter. If you’ve ever tried to have a simple conversation with a narcissist and somehow ended up apologizing… this episode will finally make it make sense.

In Part 1 of the Manipulation Tactics Series, we break down exactly how DARVO works, why it leaves you doubting your reality, and how abusers use it to flip accountability back onto you. You’ll learn to recognize the pattern in real time, stop internalizing blame, and stay grounded when someone is trying to rewrite the truth.

This episode is for anyone who has lived through narcissistic abuse, high-conflict co-parenting, or emotionally chaotic relationships and needs clarity, language, and validation.
You’re not “too sensitive.” You’re not imagining it.
You’re dealing with a tactic designed to confuse you — and today, we name it.

In this episode, we cover:
• What DARVO looks like in everyday conversations
• Why narcissists use it as a defense mechanism
• How it creates guilt, shame, and self-doubt in the survivor
• How to emotionally detach when DARVO shows up
• What accountability should look like in a healthy relationship

If this episode brings clarity, share it with someone who needs language for what they’ve lived through. Your voice helps other survivors find theirs.

The holidays can be beautiful… but if you’re co-parenting with a narcissist, they can also feel heavy, confusing, and painfully performative.
In this bonus episode, we talk about holiday manipulation, emotional pressure, image-management, and the quiet loneliness so many parents carry this time of year.

If you’ve ever watched your co-parent “put on a show,” or felt the tension of trying to protect your children’s peace while managing someone else’s chaos — this is for you.

You’re a good parent doing your best in a hard situation.

This episode brings clarity, comfort, and a reminder: you’re not alone in this kind of co-parenting journey.

This final episode of the Understanding Trauma series is about moving from survival into restoration — learning how to receive care, honor your body, and build a life that can hold you.

We’re closing this series here and opening the door to what’s coming next, where we’ll begin a deeper conversation around manipulation, clarity, and reclaiming your voice.

There won’t be a second episode this Thursday. The next episode drops Tuesday, December 30th.

Wishing you a blessed and peaceful Christmas. 🤍