The Autism Little Learners Podcast cover art

The Autism Little Learners Podcast

The Autism Little Learners Podcast

Written by: Tara Phillips
Listen for free

You want to help your autistic students or child thrive — but it can feel overwhelming trying to figure out where to start. Whether you're wondering how to build connection, teach communication, navigate sensory needs, or support your paras… you're in the right place. Welcome to The Autism Little Learners Podcast, where compassion meets practical strategy. Host Tara Phillips, a speech-language pathologist with over two decades of experience, brings you neurodiversity-affirming insights, step-by-step tips, and real-world examples that help you feel confident, prepared, and inspired to support young autistic children. This show is relaxed, upbeat, and packed with actionable ideas you can use right away — whether you're a special educator, SLP, general education teacher, paraprofessional, parent, grandparent, or anyone who loves a young autistic child. Each episode explores topics like: Teaching communication and AAC in natural, joyful ways Using visual supports and routines to create predictability Fostering co-regulation and independence Understanding sensory needs and reducing stress Supporting paraprofessionals with clarity and compassion Building strong, trusting relationships with autistic kids Tara's approach is rooted in connection over compliance — helping you see each child's strengths, honor their communication style, and create an inclusive environment where everyone can succeed. Subscribe to The Autism Little Learners Podcast and join the movement toward more compassionate, affirming early childhood education. Connect with Tara: 📘 Facebook: facebook.com/autismlittlelearners 📸 Instagram: instagram.com/autismlittlelearners 🌐 Website: autismlittlelearners.com2025 Parenting Relationships
Episodes
  • #188: Regulate, Connect, Routines: These Come Before Teaching

    #188: Regulate, Connect, Routines: These Come Before Teaching
    Aug 18 2026

    This is Week 1 of 6 in the Back to School Foundations replay series. While I'm in Portland helping my daughter move into her first house, I'm revisiting six episodes I think will help most as you head back to school. New season starts Tuesday, September 29th, with five weeks on AAC for AAC Awareness Month.

    So much of what goes wrong in September is really about something that was never put in place in August. Three things. That's it. Here's what they are.

    I'm starting this series at the very beginning, with the framework I built to answer the question I get more than any other: where do I even start?

    The answer is not with the IEP goals. It's with regulate, connect, and routines. Those are the three things that have to be in place before teaching begins, and teach is the fourth pillar that everything else holds up. We all want to jump straight to teach. Sit at the table, trace the name, sort the colors. But a child who isn't regulated can't take in what you're offering, and a child who doesn't trust you yet has no reason to try.

    The framework is fluid. You'll move back and forth between all four pillars every day, student by student. A child can be doing beautifully in a teaching activity and be dysregulated two minutes later, and at that point we set our agenda aside and go back to what we know helps that child. That's not a detour from the work. That is the work.

    We'll talk about:

    • Why regulation has to come before expectation, and what interoception has to do with it
    • How to build connection with children you don't know yet, without going into teacher mode
    • How predictable routines lower anxiety and grow independence
    • The four pillars of the Autism Little Learners Framework: Regulate, Connect, Routines, Teach

    In This Episode, You'll Learn:

    • Why a dysregulated child is not in a position to take in new learning
    • Why true self-regulation doesn't develop until well past early childhood, and what to do instead
    • What "teacher mode" sounds like, and why the questions get in the way
    • How to join a child's play without taking it over or directing it
    • Why speaking is not the only way to communicate, and what multimodal communication looks like

    Key Takeaways:

    • Regulation before expectation. If a child isn't regulated, the lesson isn't landing.
    • Co-regulation is the starting point at the early childhood level, not self-regulation.
    • You have to reach the child before you can teach the child.
    • No significant learning takes place without a significant relationship.
    • Speaking is not the only way to communicate. Every child is already communicating.
    • Predictable routines reduce anxiety and build independence.
    • The framework is fluid. You'll move back and forth between all four pillars every single day.

    Try This:

    • Send the Child Interest Survey home this week and use what comes back
    • Join one child in their favorite activity without asking a single question
    • Watch and copy what a child is doing instead of directing the play
    • Ask your OT for one sensory idea for one specific child
    • Teach a calming sequence with a visual cue before you need it
    • Look at one child's visual schedule and check the length and the symbol type against what that child actually understands
    • Pick one daily routine and make a visual sequence for it

    Related Resources & Links:

    ❤️ Child Interest Survey (free)

    ❤️ Free Visual Support Starter Set

    ❤️ Autism Little Learners Membership

    "Children learn best when they like their teacher and when they think their teacher likes them." Gordon Neufeld
    Show More Show Less
    17 mins
  • #187: Autism Is Not A Tragedy with Cari Ebert (Keynote from 2026 Preschool Autism Summit)

    #187: Autism Is Not A Tragedy with Cari Ebert (Keynote from 2026 Preschool Autism Summit)
    Aug 11 2026
    "Don't buy him letters." That's what a professional told Cari Ebert when her son Aaron was two. He was "obsessed," they said, and needed to be moved toward more appropriate play. Cari ignored them. Those letters were how Aaron showed joy, and how she connected with him. Nearly two decades later, that same deep interest in letters, numbers, and dates is what landed him a job he loves. That moment is the heart of today's episode, because it's exactly what happens when we treat autism as a journey instead of a tragedy. This is Cari's keynote from this year's Preschool Autism Summit. She brings two lenses to it: 30+ years as a pediatric SLP, and 21 years as mom to her autistic son. Together they make a case that so much of what we were taught to fear, grieve, and "fix" was never the problem. The problem was the language, the linear milestones, and the compliance-first thinking we inherited. Cari walks us through Aaron's whole story, from spelling words before he could speak, to teaching himself to tie his shoes at 20, to reading bedtime stories to his baby nephew. Along the way she gives us a clearer, kinder way to talk to families and a real shift in how we show up for autistic children. We'll talk about: why the child is exactly the same the day after a diagnosis, and it's the adults who need to shiftthe power of first messages, and how "red flags" teach families to fear a diagnosis deficit-based language versus affirming, neutral, strengths-based languagewhat autism is not, and what it actually isthe spiky, non-linear developmental profile reframing the spectrum into a support-needs profile honoring autistic joy as the doorway to connection and learning Because we don't get to decide where an autistic child's journey ends. Our job is to keep believing there's more ahead. In This Episode, You'll Learn Why autism is a journey, not a tragedy, and what changes when we lead with curiosity instead of fearHow deficit-driven language sends the message that something is "wrong" with the child, and how to choose affirming or neutral language insteadWhy autism is not a delay, a disease, or something a child outgrowsWhat a spiky developmental profile is, and why milestone charts don't fit autistic developmentHow to give families space to grieve their expectations, not the child in front of themWhat presuming potential looks like in real life, including how video modeling helped Aaron learn a skill on his own timelineWhy deep interests, from Metallica to NASCAR, are the way in, not something to redirect Key Takeaways The diagnosis doesn't change the child; it changes how the adults see and support them Regulation creates the conditions for learning, and connection comes before communicationAll behavior has meaning; it's a clue, not a problem to extinguish Progress isn't linear, and growth continues across the whole lifespan Communication is a right, not something a child has to earn Autistic children are different, not lessWe stretch strengths instead of fixing deficits Families are the experts on their child, and the most important members of the team Try This Take one traditional IEP goal and ask AI to rewrite it in neurodiversity-affirming language, without percentage-of-accuracy measuresSwap deficit words for neutral ones this week: "deep interests" instead of "obsessions," "prefers consistency" instead of "rigid" Learn one child's deep interest, and use it as your starting point instead of redirecting it Reframe a behavior you'd usually try to stop, and ask what it's communicating about the nervous system Notice a child's glimmers, the small things that bring them micro-moments of joy, and make room for them Start with connection before you ask for a single communication skill Related Resources & Links Cari Ebert's website - The Learning to Learn program, the Silly Sounds cards, and The SLP Talk Show podcast Preschool Autism Summit 2026 - Grab the summit replay bundle, a free guide, and get on the waitlist for 2027 Autism Little Learners Membership When we treat autism as a journey instead of a tragedy, we stop asking a child to prove they're worthy of our belief and start offering it from the very beginning. Cari's son didn't become worthy the day he got a job or gave a keynote. He was always worthy. Once you see every autistic child that way, it changes everything about how you teach.
    Show More Show Less
    1 hr and 15 mins
  • #186: It's Not Defiance, It's PDA (with Casey Ehrlich) Encore

    #186: It's Not Defiance, It's PDA (with Casey Ehrlich) Encore
    Aug 4 2026
    The one who melts down at the smallest request, who seems to dig in the moment you say "do this."...you know this child. In this episode I sit down with Casey Ehrlich, PhD — social scientist, founder of At Peace Parents, and a leader in the first peer-reviewed PDA research in the United States — to talk about PDA: what it is, why it's a nervous system response rather than defiance, and what actually helps. PDA isn't defiance. It's a survival-level drive for autonomy — and once you see that, you respond to the child in front of you completely differently. PDA most often stands for pathological demand avoidance, but many autistic people prefer pervasive (or persistent) drive for autonomy — because autonomy is right at the root of what activates the nervous system. Casey defines it as a survival drive for autonomy and equality that can override other survival instincts like eating, sleeping, toileting, and even safety. We talk through what PDA actually looks like in young children, why behavior that reads as oppositional or manipulative is so often a nervous-system response, and the practical, compassionate shifts that help a dysregulated child feel safe again — in the classroom and at home. We'll talk about: ● what PDA stands for — and why many autistic people prefer "pervasive drive for autonomy" ● why demand avoidance is a nervous system response, not manipulation or defiance ● the five characteristics Casey looks for, including equalizing behavior ● why we flip the order for PDA kids: nervous system and autonomy first ● the difference between independence and autonomy ● real strategies: signals of safety, declarative language, and rhythms over routines In This Episode, You'll Learn • What PDA is, and why "pervasive or persistent drive for autonomy" may describe it better • How a survival drive for autonomy can override eating, sleeping, toileting, and safety • Why "equalizing behavior" can look oppositional but is actually a nervous-system response • How to read the early signals that a child is moving toward fight-or-flight • Why reducing spoken language and using declarative language lowers perceived demands • How to send signals of safety with your face, tone, and body — and why getting low matters • What the "four S's" — safe nervous system, screens, sensory/novelty, special interest — reveal about regulation • Why repair and felt safety, not teaching, are the moves in the hard moment Key Takeaways • PDA is a nervous system response, not defiance or manipulation • Autonomy is at the root — a perceived loss of autonomy activates the survival brain • For PDA kids, think nervous system and autonomy first, then sensory, executive function, and communication • Independence is doing a task alone; autonomy is having a genuine say in what happens • Signals of safety often matter more than words • Declarative language lowers the demand a child perceives • Think rhythms, not rigid routines — even a chosen routine can start to feel like lost autonomy • Compassion over compliance — always Try This • Pause and ask whether a behavior might be a nervous-system response to a perceived demand • Lower the demand: swap questions and directions for declarative, observational statements • Get low to the child's level and soften your face, tone, and pace • Offer real autonomy — a genuine say, not just a choice between two adult-chosen options • Reduce spoken language during escalation and wait for the child to re-engage • Build in rhythms instead of rigid routines • In the hard moment, focus on repair and felt safety, not on teaching the lesson Related Resources & Links 💚 Casey Ehrlich — At Peace Parents (free PDA masterclass) 💚 At Peace Parents Podcast 💚 The Declarative Language Handbook by Linda K. Murphy 💚 Free Visual Support Starter Set 💚 Autism Little Learners Membership When we stop asking "How do I get this child to comply?" and start asking "What is this child's nervous system telling me?" everything changes. PDA kids aren't giving us a hard time — they're having a hard time. And when we lead with autonomy, safety, and compassion, we give them what they actually need to come back to calm and connection.
    Show More Show Less
    48 mins
adbl_web_anon_alc_button_suppression_t1
No reviews yet