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You can name everyone else's favorites — your kid's, your husband's, your best

friend's. But when someone asks you? You go blank. This week we fix that.

If you've been feeling lost in midlife — foggy about who you even are anymore

after years of taking care of everyone else — this episode is the fastest,

most joyful map back to yourself I know. It starts with one question we

haven't been asked since we were kids: what do you love? And it ends with a

simple, do-it-on-a-receipt tool called the Favorite Things List.

Because your joys aren't fluff. They're breadcrumbs — the glittering

fingerprints of the woman you actually are, the one no amount of shoulds ever

fully erased.

IN THIS EPISODE:

- Why you can't reclaim a self you never bothered to notice

- The Favorite Things List: 3 little moves (Then / Now / the Through-Line)

- How to get specific enough that the list reintroduces you to yourself

- Why what delights you points straight at your God-given gifts

- Your pinkie-toe step: reclaim ONE favorite thing this week

Chapters

• 0:00 — The handshake: meeting the woman you've been too busy to know
• 0:23 — What today is about (and one embarrassing warning)
• 1:20 — My favorite things (yes, I sing)
• 2:17 — The one list I go back to more than any other
• 3:03 — Joy Nugget: you can't reclaim a self you never noticed
• 3:15 — Digging where the clues are buried: childhood
• 4:14 — Your factory settings + the Favorite Things List (3 moves)
• 5:40 — Then / Now / the Through-Line
• 6:21 — A peek at my present-day list (glimpses of heaven)
• 8:02 — Joy Nugget: what lights you up is your light
• 8:57 — Your Rebel Move this week
• 9:37 — The most honest prayer you've got
• 10:23 — Your pinkie-toe step
• 10:53 — Reclaim your JOY (free tools inside)

A LINE TO KEEP: "Your joy was never a distraction from your purpose.

Some days it's the most honest prayer you've got."

Welcome to the Rebellion. We've saved you a seat.

Resources:

- Free Play: REBEL JOY Card Deck — Romanticize your life and reclaim your light — one tiny rebellion at a time. Seven print-and-keep cards, each with one brave, joyful prompt. Pick a card, set a 60-second timer, and play. Start Playing Again! https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/72c327f4a4

- For the exact scripts for the next time you go blank or catch yourself saying an automatic yes, grab the Rebel Response Mini Kit here: https://rachelharrisonline.com/product-details/product/the-rebel-response-mini-kit

- FREE: Are YOU a Good Girl Ghost? Free Guide: 5 Moments You're Abandoning Yourself (Without Even Realizing It) https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/e6b737ec08

- Work with me 1:1 on the Rebel Path — a single Rebel Hour, or the Rebel

Practice 12-week mentorship: https://rachelharrisonline.com/work-with-me

My Substack Page, Goodbye, Good Girl: https://joyfulrebel.substack.com/

Are YOU A Joyful Rebel? https://rachelharrisonline.com/joyful-rebel

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In this episode, I get honest about the rules we’re all living by — the ones nobody ever said out loud, that we never agreed to, that somehow still run our whole lives.

I take you into my closet (the skirt-and-makeup rule I obeyed for thirty years without knowing it), into a bathroom in Houston where my dad re-caulked my tub before our move (and the completely wrong story my brain wrote about it), and into a practice I’m a little too excited about: writing your own personal commandments.

If you’ve ever paused and thought wait — where did that rule even come from? — this one’s for you. We're taking back the pen.

In this episode:

• Why the rules we never questioned (some written when we were five) quietly steer our whole adult lives

• “Good girl ghosting in rulebook form” — the slow self-betrayal of obeying a code you never wrote

• The two-part question that cracks a rule open: Who told me that? and Is this Jesus or judgment?

• The Rule Breaker List — a 3-move practice you can do on the back of a receipt

• A handful of my own personal commandments (own my magic, run toward the roar, everything is information, act with integrity)

• The bathtub-caulk story: how my storyteller wrote the wrong script about my dad — and how I got to rewrite it on the spot

• Your pinkie-toe step and this week’s permission slips

A few lines worth remembering:

• “A rule that you never said out loud can still run your whole life. So name it and write a better one.”

• “Same caulk, same muttering, completely different story. Only one of them was true.”

• “You’re allowed to ask, who told me that?”

• “I get to be soft and bright and feminine because I’m alive, not because I earned it.”

• "Your story isn’t prophecy unless you keep living it.”

Resources:

- Free Play: REBEL JOY Card Deck — Romanticize your life and reclaim your light — one tiny rebellion at a time. Seven print-and-keep cards, each with one brave, joyful prompt. Pick a card, set a 60-second timer, and play. Start Playing Again! https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/72c327f4a4

- For the exact scripts for the next time you go blank or catch yourself saying an automatic yes, grab the Rebel Response Mini Kit here: https://rachelharrisonline.com/product-details/product/the-rebel-response-mini-kit

- FREE: Are YOU a Good Girl Ghost? Free Guide: 5 Moments You're Abandoning Yourself (Without Even Realizing It) https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/e6b737ec08

- Work with me 1:1 on the Rebel Path — a single Rebel Hour, or the Rebel

Practice 12-week mentorship: https://rachelharrisonline.com/work-with-me

My Substack Page, Goodbye, Good Girl: https://joyfulrebel.substack.com/

Are YOU A Joyful Rebel? https://rachelharrisonline.com/joyful-rebel

Send us Fan Mail

Identifying your core values at midlife is one of the first steps toward creating a life that is YOURS -- not someone else's. Stop chasing goals that don't fit your life!

In this episode, I get honest about something a little embarrassing: for most of my life I could tell you exactly what everyone around me valued — my kids, my husband, my closest friends — and then go completely blank on my own. So today I’m walking you through the exact practice I used to find my real core values. Not the aspirational, vision-board, sounds-good-on-a-job-application ones. The ones that, when you violate them, make you feel like a stranger in your own skin — and when you honor them, make you feel like you.

I share the night I read my finished list from top to bottom, got chills, and cried — not because I’d accomplished something, but because I felt seen by myself for maybe the first time ever. I talk about why two people can write the exact same word and still hold completely different values (your fingerprint lives in the story behind the word, not the word). And I give you the practice, step by step, so you can start today.

In this episode:

• Why most of us think we know our values — and don’t — and what that gap quietly costs us

• The difference between a value you inherited and a value that’s actually yours

• How living by values you never chose has a name: Good Girl Ghosting

• The novelist’s secret I used on my own values (the blinking cursor that’s never perfectionism — it’s listening)

• The two-step practice: name three, then write the paragraph that gives you goosebumps

• How every named value gives you a cleaner answer to the only question that matters in the moment

A few lines worth remembering:

• “You can’t live what you haven’t named.”

• “Two people can share a value. Only you carry your version of it.”

• “Your values aren’t rules. They’re a description of who you already are when fear isn’t making the decisions.”

• “Do I respect myself here, or do I betray myself here?”

Next steps:

• Naming your values alone is powerful. Naming them in a room full of women deciding the same brave thing is a whole different kind of alive — that’s the Good Girl Ghosting Reset, and I’m opening it to a small founding group of Founding Sisters. Find me on Instagram @RachelHarrisOnline and DM me the word RESET for the details.

• Want a gentle place to start? DM me MY STORY, or grab the free guide, 5 Moments You’re Abandoning Yourself (Without Even Realizing It) — link in the show notes.

#GoodGirlGhosting #JoyfulRebel #midlifewomen #corevalues #midlifeidentity #selfdiscovery #christianwomen

Resources:

- Free Play: REBEL JOY Card Deck — Romanticize your life and reclaim your light — one tiny rebellion at a time. Seven print-and-keep cards, each with one brave, joyful prompt. Pick a card, set a 60-second timer, and play. Start Playing Again! https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/72c327f4a4

- For the exact scripts for the next time you go blank or catch yourself saying an automatic yes, grab the Rebel Response Mini Kit here: https://rachelharrisonline.com/product-details/product/the-rebel-response-mini-kit

- FREE: Are YOU a Good Girl Ghost? Free Guide: 5 Moments You're Abandoning Yourself (Without Even Realizing It) https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/e6b737ec08

- Work with me 1:1 on the Rebel Path — a single Rebel Hour, or the Rebel

Practice 12-week mentorship: https://rachelharrisonline.com/work-with-me

My Substack Page, Goodbye, Good Girl: https://joyfulrebel.substack.com/

Are YOU A Joyful Rebel? https://rachelharrisonline.com/joyful-rebel