Lauren and Trey begin 2026 with a nuanced dialogue about willing and wanting in long-term partnership.

In this 30-minute episode, they unpack a recent real-life conversation where Trey shares that he feels “willing” is a tier below “wanting,” while Lauren challenges that framework. Drawing from Kai Cheng Thom’s Spectrum of Consent and Dr. Betty Martin’s Wheel of Consent, they explore whether willingness and wanting must be hierarchical, or if they can live on the same tier as different, equally valid experiences.

Lauren shares why giving a gift, when done within her limits, can feel deeply joyful, even when it’s not something she actively wants. Trey reflects on moments where he’s been willing for Lauren, how those choices felt in his body, and why his second read of The Art of Receiving and Giving is shifting how he understands consent, generosity, and care.

Together, they talk through specific scenarios, including an upcoming trip that’s “for Trey,” and how naming willingness (without resentment or self-abandonment) can actually strengthen trust and intimacy. They also draw a clear distinction between consensual willingness and the familiar but harmful pattern of “taking one for the team.”

This episode is an invitation to rethink consent beyond yes/no binaries and to explore how giving, receiving, and choosing each other can look when both partners stay connected to their own limits.

If this conversation brings up questions about consent, desire, or navigating willingness in your own relationship, Lauren offers free consults for individuals and couples. Visit sexedforyou.com/freeconsult to request yours.

Ideal for couples in long-term partnerships who want deeper intimacy, more desire, and better sex.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

In this final episode of 2025, Lauren and Trey continue their conversation on admiration and its role in sustaining desire in long-term partnership. They share how writing notes of admiration on their refrigerator whiteboard has become a simple, meaningful daily practice.

Lauren reflects on how admiration fuels her desire and why it matters to feel known as a woman of worth to Trey rather than a container for his jizz. From there, they explore the dynamics of sexual desire through David Schnarch’s concepts of the Higher Desire Partner (HDP) and Lower Desire Partner (LDP), including the insight that the LDP ultimately controls the sex that is had.

Trey shares that Lauren is the LDP in their partnership and asks what helps her feel supported. Lauren names her need for space and permission not to respond to sexual texts. Lauren then asks Trey how he feels supported as the HDP, and he shares how she celebrates his self-pleasure, schedules sex, and plans sexy staycations.

They draw a parallel to everyday life, including Lauren as the HDP around hosting and how being supported without shame strengthens connection. Lauren reminds listeners that we are not sexually broken, we simply “don’t know how to drive,” and emphasizes the importance of knowing and owning desire.

The episode closes with laughter as they play the I Want! game, celebrating desire without obligation, and ends with a classic cutoff moment. They’ll be back next week for part three of this holiday trio. (Enjoy the accidental cut-off!)

If this conversation stirred something for you, especially around admiration, desire, or feeling seen in your partnership, you don’t have to navigate it alone. You can request a free 15-minute consultation at ⁠sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠.

Ideal for couples in long-term partnerships who want deeper intimacy, more desire, and better sex.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast

⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

What actually keeps desire alive in long-term partnerships? According to Emily Nagoski, PhD, it’s not relentless passion—it’s admiration.

In this episode of The Partnership Podcast, Lauren and Trey explore why liking, respecting, and admiring your partner may be one of the most powerful (and under-practiced) ingredients in sustaining erotic connection over time. Quoting Nagoski’s book Come Together, they reflect on her reminder:
“You don’t need to want your partner passionately so much as you need to like them, admire them, and believe that they are worth some effort.”

They kick things off with a vulnerable and hilarious story about Lauren forgetting to replenish a household item—and jokingly “making up for it” by seducing Trey (yes, the heels make sense once you hear the story). From there, they share a simple but profound ritual inspired by Nagoski’s work: ending the day by naming five things they admire about one another.

Mid-episode, Trey invites Lauren to coach him live as a “pretend client” who is afraid to ask for admiration after being ridiculed in the past. Lauren walks listeners through compassionate, grounded ways to initiate conversations about admiration with a partner—offering tools that are immediately usable and deeply regulating.

They also introduce the idea of increasing our positive affect tolerance: practicing receiving compliments by making eye contact and simply saying, “thank you.” Together, they unpack why receiving admiration can feel surprisingly difficult—and why cultivating a culture of admiration in our homes and relationships is essential for intimacy, safety, and desire.

This conversation marks Part One of a three-part series designed to support partnerships through the holiday season. Be sure to come back next Monday at 7am for Part Two as Lauren and Trey continue this important exploration.

If this conversation stirred something for you, especially around admiration, desire, or feeling seen in your partnership, you don’t have to navigate it alone. You can request a free 15-minute consultation for individuals and couples who want support building more connected, intimate, and resilient relationships.Request your consult at sexedforyou.com/freeconsult.

Ideal for couples in long-term partnerships who want deeper intimacy, more desire, and better sex.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast

⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

What happens when old relationship patterns collide with real-time growth?

Lauren and Trey start this episode with a wild night out that sparks a raw conversation about ex partner behavior, accountability, and emotional maturity. After witnessing prank calls and performative attempts to re-enter an ex’s orbit while they were on a date, Lauren names the behavior clearly. At best, it’s childish. At worst, it crosses into bullying and harassment.

Instead of judging from a distance, Lauren invites Trey to reflect on the times he’s done versions of this himself. They explore why intent does not negate impact, how none of us were taught how to be in romantic relationships, and why grace for our younger selves is essential to growth. Trey shares two candid stories from his past, while Lauren reflects on a moment when wanting to be chosen meant not choosing herself.

At the 26 minute mark, the conversation shifts as they unpack a financial change in their partnership, with Lauren stepping into the role of primary breadwinner. Trey opens up about fears around contribution, masculinity, and being left behind, while Lauren names how meaningful it is that these conversations are happening at all. They revisit the origin of Sex Ed For You, the belief that fueled it, and how old money stories can resurface even in secure relationships.

Lauren closes by honoring the courage it takes to seek support and growth. Trey ends with a message to straight men in particular. Seeking help is never shameful.

If this conversation resonates, please like, comment, and share the episode.

And if you're looking for sex and relationship coaching you’re invited to request a free consult with Lauren at www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult

Ideal for couples in long-term partnerships who want deeper intimacy, more desire, and better sex.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast

⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

In this intimate, grounded conversation, Lauren and Trey explore the truth about women dating shorter men, what culture tells us, what we internalize, and how couples can rewrite the scripts they’ve inherited. Lauren is about an inch taller than Trey without heels, and she often wears heels at his request. Their dynamic opens the door to a deeper look at how lived experiences, early messages, ego, and desire shape the attractions we feel in adulthood.

\They talk about how every one of us is a sexuality educator, whether we mean to be or not. The ways we speak about bodies, preferences, and turn-ons either extend permission or reinforce shame. This leads into a meaningful discussion on the difference between sexual preferences and kinks, and why labeling something a “kink” often reflects cultural discomfort more than personal truth.

To ground the conversation, they offer this clear definition:

“Kink or kinky is seen as an umbrella term for sexual counter-culture, meaning that it goes against the mainstream, vanilla society. Whereas a fetish refers to a specific object, behavior, body part, or fantasy that is necessary for a person to achieve sexual enjoyment or arousal, but it's not always required to be physically present. There is often overlap between kinks and fetishes and sometimes the two terms are used interchangeably to describe a unique turn-on. But, unlike a fetish, a kink is not required for arousal, only preferred or enjoyed.”

Lauren and Trey also explore the inner work required to go against cultural expectations while gently naming that it is absolutely OK to have preferences.

If this conversation resonates, please like, comment, and share the episode.

And if you're wanting support around embodied attraction, sexual preferences, or relational dynamics, you’re invited to request a free consult with Lauren at www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult

Ideal for couples in long-term partnerships who want deeper intimacy, more desire, and better sex.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast

⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

In this candid and intimate episode, Lauren and Trey explore the idea of sexual currency and how consistent deposits into a partner's sexual bank account can transform intimacy in long-term relationships. They share the story of a magical sexual encounter they had the night before and talk about why it was only possible because Trey had been investing in Lauren's sexual bank account for the past 4 to 6 weeks.

They revisit the rough menstrual cycle documented earlier in the season and talk about the way Lauren has been shedding an old version of herself. Trey’s patience, curiosity, and willingness to give her the space she needs have helped her feel more attracted, more connected, and more open to erotic exploration.

Together they break down the specific investments that made the difference. Curious questions. Protecting Lauren’s alone time. Mutual masturbation and how they make it work. Words of affirmation. Compliments. Acts of service, including Trey laundering Lauren’s period underwear. And the impact of Trey not complaining, sulking, or pressuring Lauren when her capacity for sex shifted.

They also share a recent moment where Trey offered Lauren feedback and she tried a new technique of listening as a friend instead of as someone who needed to defend herself. That shift made a deposit in Trey’s sexual bank account and created more emotional space and helped deepen their connection.

Lauren and Trey talk about how when women say they do not want sex - they are talking about the boring kind of sex. The type of sex women actually want is sex that feels safe, secure, connected, and adventurous. They describe why last night’s sex is the kind most couples dream about and how it becomes possible through emotional investment, clear communication, and trust.

Lauren also shares her favorite Maude vibrator, the VIBE: https://getmaude.com/SEFY?q=vibe-personal-massager

If you want to learn how to make meaningful deposits into your partner's sexual bank account, you can request a free consult at: www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult

If this episode supports you, please like, share, and subscribe.

Ideal for couples in long-term partnerships who want deeper intimacy, more desire, and better sex.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast

⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

In this episode, Lauren and Trey explore what it really looks like to shadowbox through conflict instead of slipping into fusion, isolation, or the old patterns their bodies once relied on.

They discuss Jessica Fern’s Distancer–Pursuer dance, celebrating the one who reaches for connection under stress and the one who pulls toward autonomy.

Lauren then brings up their recent train ride back from NYC and how Trey surprised them both by turning toward connection instead of shutting down. She explains how the rough start began with a taxi stopping in the middle of traffic at Penn Station, lowering Trey’s resiliency score before the conversation even began. Trey breaks down his Resiliency Check-In scale for listeners:

Resiliency Check-In:

5 = I could jump through a wall

4 = I could accomplish anything

3 = I'm good to go for the basic tasks

2 = I probably need to be in bed watching TV

1 = No, I can't do anything and I need to take a bath and go to bed

They walk through the uncomfortable minutes waiting for their train, the shadows that surfaced, and the trauma nap Lauren took as her infant self’s old coping strategy. They revisit the moment when Trey looked out the window and admitted he wanted to run away, and how choosing to stay shifted everything. They talk about why resolving things quickly to keep the peace is tempting, and why sitting in discomfort is often the more honest path.

Hours later, Lauren describes the internal battle of trying to say no, sensing her system avoid the threat of disconnection, and how Trey encouraged clarity instead of collapse. She reflects on the roots of not being able to say no in her home of origin, then shares how the Willingness and Wanting Scales from their Like a Pro training helped her discover that her truth was not a simple no but a yes with limits or a yes if that.

Lauren closes with pride in the way they shadowboxed on the train with tenderness and skill. Trey shares why walking is still his favorite way to have hard conversations and why trains will probably never be his preferred arena for relational growth.

If any of these subjects have piqued your interest, request a free consult at: www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult

If this episode resonates with you, please like, subscribe, and share with someone who may need to hear these words.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.

Lauren and Trey dive into Season 2 of Netflix’s Nobody Wants This, and yes, there are definitely spoilers. The first third of the episode is pure chaos in the best way: the two of them can’t stop laughing, Lauren’s in a short skirt and tights, and Trey keeps telling listeners to go watch the video version because “you really need to see her outfit and hair today.”

Things heat up even more when Trey drops words like “archetype” and “tools for repair.” Lauren - ever the unabashed sapiosexual - keeps teasing that he’s absolutely getting lucky if he keeps talking like that.

From there, they break down the dynamics unfolding on the show: the “good boyfriend” archetype, the guilt around taking a “night off,” long-term relationship ruts, and, of course, jealousy in monogamous partnerships. That last one opens the door to a tender moment where Lauren admits she can’t know for sure if Trey will stay forever… and also knows she’d be okay, because of who she’s become.

They talk about the importance of telling the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable—like on their recent train ride back from NYC when Trey said, “That’s not OK, and you need to talk to your coach about that,” and Lauren appreciated the honesty instead of bristling.

The episode wraps with the two of them taking turns pretending to be characters from the show and “coaching” each other through messy plotlines. It’s hilarious, revealing, and full of heart.

If you want support working through the kinds of relationship patterns and dynamics you see on the show, you can request a free consult with Lauren at www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult

If this episode resonates with you, please like, subscribe, and share with someone who may need to hear these words.

About Us: Lauren and Trey are partners living in Central Virginia where Lauren owns and operates, SEX ED FOR YOU. She provides comprehensive sexuality education and embodied coaching to individuals, partners, and parents.

Through a biopsychosocial approach, Sex Ed for You works to restore positive and respectful approaches to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as increase the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. (WHO)

Sexual health is fundamental to the overall health and well-being of individuals, couples and families, and to the social and economic development of communities and countries. (WHO) When individuals are blocked from sexual health they are stunted from developing a sense of sensual play and enjoyment.

• Learn more about Sex Ed for You at ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com⁠⁠

• Schedule a FREE CONSULT with Lauren today: ⁠⁠https://www.sexedforyou.com/freeconsult⁠⁠

• Learn more about partnered communication best practices on Sex Ed For You’s Instagram Page: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/sex_ed_for_you/⁠⁠

• Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more videos about sex, partnership, communication, and love: ⁠⁠https://youtube.com/@thepartnershippodcast⁠⁠

Reminders: This is not a "how to" podcast, but rather a "how they" podcast. Please listen to our opinions and then come to your own! Learn from our mistakes or give our techniques a try! It’s all up to you. Lauren is NOT a therapist. She is a Certified Holistic Sexuality Educator and Embodied Intimacy and Relationship Coach.