Episode 54: Are Influencers Ruining Kindness?

Someone pays for a stranger's groceries. The help is real. But did the person want their difficult moment shared with millions of people?

Greg Shaw, Rich, Liam, and Sarah talk about kindness videos, money, consent, and what happens when someone's private struggle becomes online content.

We leave room for different answers, including why these videos can move us and why some make us uncomfortable.

We discuss:

• Whether someone who needs help can freely say no to being filmed.

• Why receiving help shouldn't come with a test of gratitude.

• What changes when creators, brands, or television shows earn money from a good deed.

• How to share kindness while protecting someone's privacy.

• Sarah's family tradition of leaving dollar bills at hospital vending machines.

• Small ways to help without asking for a public reaction.

In What's on Your Heart, we talk about time with loved ones, challenging racism and homophobia, receiving unexpected kindness, and living with pain.

This week's challenge

Send a private thank-you to someone whose support mattered to you.

Or offer a small act of help and let the other person choose what they share.

If you want to tell their story online, make sure they can say no without losing the help.

One question to take away: What rule would you want every kindness creator to follow?

Listen to Episode 54: https://kindnessrx.org/54

More episodes: https://kindnessrx.org/listen

Free online peer support groups: https://kindnessrx.org/groups

Brain injury: Mondays.

Chronic pain: Tuesdays.

Mental health: Wednesdays.

Research mentioned in the episode

American Psychiatric Association, 2023 Healthy Minds Poll:

https://www.psychiatry.org/news-room/news-releases/new-poll-small-acts-of-kindness-benefits

Among 2,210 U.S. adults surveyed, 90% said receiving kindness made them feel at least a little better.

This was a self-report poll, not a study of being filmed or of kindness videos.

Further reading, added after recording

Elizabeth Dunn's TED Talk on helping and happiness:

https://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_dunn_helping_others_makes_us_happier_but_it_matters_how_we_do_it

UNICEF's ethical reporting guidance, including children's privacy and dignity:

https://www.unicef.org/media/reporting-guidelines

A clarification about recording

• Our discussion includes broad comments about filming people in public.
• Recording and publication rules vary by location and circumstances.
• Being in public doesn't settle every question about audio consent, privacy, or commercial use.

A useful U.S. starting point is the Reporters Committee's state-by-state guide:

https://www.rcfp.org/reporters-recording-guide/

Content note: Financial hardship, homelessness, vulnerability, caregiving, racism, homophobia, and occasional strong language.

This is a peer conversation.

Our groups and podcast do not replace therapy, medical care, or professional advice.

What happens when someone you love sees an important issue in a completely different way?

A conversation at the kitchen table can turn tense quickly, especially when politics, values, and family history are all tangled together.

I’m joined by Rich, Liam, and Sarah for a candid conversation about what happens inside us when we disagree, why it can hurt more with family, and how to listen without pretending we agree.

We talk about news fatigue, taking a pause, and setting boundaries when a conversation stops helping. We also share what gives us hope that people can still connect across differences.

This is a conversation among friends. We don’t have perfect answers, and kindness does not require anyone to accept insults, threats, or harm.

In this episode:

• Why disagreements with loved ones can feel so personal.
• Listening to understand without giving up your own views.
• How to say, “I care about you, but I need to pause this conversation.”
• The effect of headlines, feeds, and repeated arguments on how we see one another.
• Two small challenges: pause before sharing a story or set one news boundary.

This week’s question: How do you stay connected to people you love when you see important issues in different ways?

Listen and share: https://KindnessRX.org/listen

Our free online support groups: https://KindnessRX.org/groups

Support: If you’re in the U.S. and need immediate emotional or suicide crisis support, call or text 988 or visit https://988lifeline.org/.

Outside the U.S., look for local support at https://findahelpline.com/.

If you’re in immediate danger, contact local emergency services.

Further reading: American Psychological Association, Stress in America 2024: https://www.apa.org/pubs/reports/stress-in-america/2024/

Pew Research Center, Americans’ feelings about politics and political discourse:

https://www.pewresearch.org/politics/2023/09/19/americans-feelings-about-politics-polarization-and-the-tone-of-political-discourse/

This podcast offers peer conversation, not therapy or crisis care.

For the past year, The Support & Kindness Podcast has consistently released new episodes on Mondays.

Because of changes in schedules and the demands of this season, we’re moving our regular release day.

Going forward, look for new episodes on Wednesdays.

Nothing else is changing.

Greg, Rich, Liam, and Sarah will continue bringing you honest and supportive conversations about mental health, brain injury, chronic pain, disability, kindness, and everyday life.

Thank you for listening and being part of our community.

Listen and follow the podcast at KindnessRX.org/listen

Whilst you wait, remember we offer free weekly support groups: KindnessRX.org/groups