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The things I do for you fucking people.

Where am I going with this? Well, since We Bury the Dead and Uncontained, both decent movies, with the Daisy Ridley effort immediately cementing itself in my top 50 zombie movies, we are back on the slippery downward slope with this one – Bong of the Living Dead, not to be confused with Bong of the Dead, although, yes, for you dear listeners I am watching Both! Yes both! The 2011 Canadian movie BONG of the Dead, where Although the world is dealing with a zombie apocalypse, two friends decide to make the best of it. They use zombie brains as fertilizer to grow powerful cannabis. And the 2017 AMERICAN Bong of the living dead Friends fighting for survival realize that the zombie apocalypse isn't all it's cracked up to be.

BONG OF THE DEAD from 2011 an experience akin to being the only sober person in a room full of drunk and stoned exhibitionists who think they’re the funniest people on Earth.

What a bag of shit… that was bad, like one of those really bad episodes of Z nation that felt like the writers were drunk, high or both, as it had nothing do with the main storyline.

3/10 avoid

And so onto the second wind of this podcast, we have slept off the 2011 Canadian bong of the dead and now have the American BONG OF THE LIVING DEAD from 2017

It gets a surprising 5.3 on IMDB and although it didn’t have enough reviews on RT to create a score, the two critics that watched it seemed to like it.

Tries to be Shaun of the Dead and fails at being remotely funny, despite some decent zombie movie references. Then becomes serious when they run out of weed and fails at that too. In the end it was far better than Bong of the Dead, but it was still shit.

4/10 avoid also

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Winter. A fly over of near black trees. The wilderness in winter seen from above and below. From under the show a shirtless man appears. It is Morley Nelsons Dan. Long hair. Blade. Ominous music.

Morley Nelson writes, directs and stars as Dan a bit of a cliché, former spec ops soldier who found the woman of his dreams, and then lost her and their baby, kinda thing. And Dan is confused and lost in the snow as he stumbled upon 7 year old Jack and cute as a button 2 year old Brooke living in a huge house by themselves. What is going on? And this is after a couple forced themselves into the house and were killed by someone, or something.

So this zombie virus has two strains, you either turn standard running zombie, I am thinking Black Summer, and will die when killed, these are Deaders, and then there are the Changers, that turn, then turn back, a la zombie versions of werewolves or, more recently, like EAT BRAINS LOVE, but more serious.

With the main story being less about the zombies and more about the head of the local militia looking for his daughter, who was part of the couple killed earlier, it does detract a little from what this could have been.

It scored 4.6/10 on IMDB and I can see why people would put it around there. I am going to round up to a 5/10 as I found it quite interesting, a fresh take to a degree but with room for improvement. As this was Morley Nelson writing, direction and starring in this well done to him pesonally, it is certainly better than a lot of indie zombie movies we have seen on the pod.

If you want to move away from the second rate Romero clones out there, give this a go. It was a few new scenes and a little bit of better writing and acting away from being Blood Quantum ish.

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I have been waiting for this one for a year. Or so it seems. It has certainly taken its sweet ass time in coming but finally I get to cross off Daisy Ridley's We Bury The Dead.

The story follows American Ava (Ridley) as she heads to Tasmania after a US weapon of mass destruction accidentally wipes out the entire population of half a million people. Ridley's husband Mitch was there for a work thing, and she wants to find him/his body.

We learn though, as she is volunteers with thousands of others to identify and retrieve the dead that some of them are coming back. And we do see them. Although the are tragic grey skinned, opaque eyed hollow people, grinding their teeth into sharp splinters.

The military are overseeing the whole thing and the returned, the undead, are immediately and ruthlessly dealt with.

Enter Brenton Thwaites' Clay, a bit of a loser, and so far away from the clean cut, pretty boy US roles he is famous for (Teen Titans, Office Uprising, Ghosts of War) you have to double take to see the unkempt, long greasy hair and swearing Aussie is him. Clay offers to take her to the other side of the island, 200 miles, to where Mitch was at the time of the tragedy.

And so this becomes a road movie, interspersed with flashbacks to Ava and Mitch's troubled marriage, right through the payoff at the end.

It is quite haunting, but not the Australian 28 Days Later that some of the trailers hinted at. A sad story about her and him. A story of loss before and after death. Moments of the Schwarzenegger Maggie. Scary moments. Don't get me wrong. Mark Coles Smith from Beast of War, was truly scary as Riley. It will stay with you. But those wanting a bloody, zombie fest will be disappointed.

I liked it though, and given this is my podcast, I score it 6.5/10. Well done all.