When life falls apart, how do you keep from turning on yourself? In this deeply personal episode of This Tantric Life, Layla shares what's helping her move through heartbreak, grief, and the endings she never wanted. She reveals the shift that changed how she measures success in her hardest moments, and how she's learning to choose what's true, even when it breaks her heart.

Discover how to interrupt self-criticism when life gets hard, stop mistaking today's pain for your whole future, and reclaim your worth beyond age or being chosen. Layla shares how she's learning to hold herself with love through the uncertainty, and stay open to the goodness she cannot yet see.

In this episode

• How to not turn on yourself when everything is super hard
• The exact techniques I use to move through challenging moments so that I can receive the goodness that is right around the corner
• How to hold yourself with love when life doesn't go your way
• How I overcome ageism and the fear of dying alone and how you can do the same

MORE FROM LAYLA

🔥 Build sexual confidence with Men's Sexual Mastery

🌹 Deepen self-love and pleasure with Obliss

💋 Make pleasure a daily ritual with MOOD

🌐 Explore Layla's teachings and programs

💌 Get free practices in your inbox

🌸 Follow us on Instagram

Timestamps

00:00 How to move through heartbreak without being mean to yourself
00:58 How living well prepares you for unwanted endings
02:58 From celebrating my recovery to facing another unexpected loss
08:48 Losing the dream home where I imagined my next chapter
13:08 The extraordinary relationship I thought could go the distance
19:22 Hope that transforms versus hope that keeps you waiting
26:38 Why I let go of a program with over $1 million already sold
43:06 The spiritual belief that makes hardship feel like failure
51:11 Explore Obliss, my self-love and pleasure program (ad)
52:32 The Burning Man lesson I now use to navigate life's hardest seasons
56:05 Learning from your choices without attacking yourself
1:04:51 The shift in how I measure success that changed my experience of heartbreak
1:08:42 My five-minute grief practice, and the words I use when self-criticism starts
1:14:06 Shop mood, my supplement brand (ad)
1:18:26 Why I'm giving myself months to grieve instead of rushing my next chapter
1:19:28 My "40 cats" era, and the fear of being unwanted
1:23:15 How I stopped making partnership the proof of my worth
1:35:40 Finding happiness beyond getting what I wanted
1:39:23 Build the support you'll need in your next hard season
1:41:53 Get my personal stories and free practices by email

Shownotes

• Why your pelvic floor affects everything from sex to core strength

• How to make self-pleasure double as pelvic floor training

• Why moisturizing your vulva matters as much as moisturizing your face

• Dr. Sara's number one piece of advice for better orgasms

• A simple, guided pelvic floor love practice you can do at home

• What Dr. Sara thinks all boys should know about the female body
  
  

Bio

Dr. Sara Reardon is a board-certified pelvic floor physical therapist, widely known as The Vagina Whisperer on Instagram and TikTok. She's the creator of The V-Hive App, an online pelvic floor workout app for pregnancy, postpartum, menopause, painful sex, and pelvic floor strengthening.

Sara has been featured in The Washington Post, Time Magazine, NPR, Harper's Bazaar, The Today Show, and numerous other podcasts, publications, and professional conferences for her advocacy and educational work as pelvic floor physical therapist. She is a TED presenter on Rethinking Postpartum Care and the author of the national bestselling book FLOORED: A Woman's Guide to Pelvic Floor Health at Every Age and Stage.

Follow Dr. Sara on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/the.vagina.whisperer, TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@thevagwhisperer, LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/sara-reardon-pt, YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@thevaginawhisperer, and Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/thevagwhisperer.

Follow Layla!

🌸 Instagram

🌐 Website

💌 Weekly Email

🎧 Listen on Apple Podcasts

🎶 Listen on Spotify

💋 MOOD Sexy Plant Activated Supplements

🔥 For Men: Men's Sexual Mastery

🌹 Obliss: The Sexual Masterclass for Women

Timestamps

00:00:47 - Join Layla's email list to receive free practices, in-depth teachings, and new episodes https://laylamartin.com/

00:00:54 - Guest introduction

00:02:23 - Dr. Sara and Layla share their own stories of peeing during activity

00:07:33 - What your pelvic floor actually is and what parts of your body it supports

00:05:33 - Discover the VITA™ Sex, Love and Relationship Coaching Certification https://laylamartin.com/coaching-certification/vita-coaching

00:14:53 - What causes dryness and how it can contribute to pain

00:20:08 - Why consent is at the core of every step of pelvic floor work

00:23:44 - [AD] 2 FREE sticks of MOOD SEX MAGIC™ Elixir with code PODCAST at checkout https://shopmood.com/shop-all/mood-sex-magic-sexy-plant-activated-elixir/

00:26:42 - The one thing Dr. Sara wants to whisper to the entire world's vaginas

00:32:27 - How Layla talks to her pussy during medical procedures (and why it helps)

00:39:47 - Why you should care for your vulva the same way you care for your face

00:50:22 - What an "O-Day" is and why a patient sends the clinic flowers every year

00:54:34 - Dr. Sara's top advice for having better orgasms

01:01:53 - A simple, guided pelvic floor love practice you can do at home

01:03:33 - Conclusion

In this special solocast episode of This Tantric Life, Layla Martin introduces a paradigm shift in how we approach pleasure, desire, and intimacy. Moving away from performance-based mechanics or static personality types, Layla frames sexual energy as a set of dynamic "superpowers" that every person can cultivate to heal blockages, deepen partner connection, and activate their full erotic potential.

Follow Layla!
⁠Instagram⁠ https://instagram.com/thelaylamartin
⁠Website⁠ https://laylamartin.com/
Weekly Email https://laylamartin.com/join-list/
⁠Listen on ⁠Apple Podcasts⁠ https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/this-tantric-life-with-layla-martin/id1685418994
Listen on ⁠Spotify⁠ https://open.spotify.com/show/72iBpAwMSsTl9zLk8fHMp1?si=9f465574aa114d63&nd=1
⁠MOOD Sexy Plant Activated Supplements⁠ https://shopmood.com/
For Men: ⁠Men's Sexual Mastery⁠ https://laylamartin.com/sexual-mastery/mens-sexual-mastery
Obliss: ⁠The Sexual Masterclass for Women⁠ https://laylamartin.com/sexual-mastery/obliss


Timestamps
00:00 - Introduction
03:00 - Superpower #1: Love yourself enough to be fully seen. (staying fully present)
How well do you love yourself? Full-body somatic awareness, emotional awareness and fully loving the experience of being alive in your body.
13:11 - Superpower #2: Trusting the Intelligence of Your Body
Dropping out of the mind and into physical sensation, allowing slow presence, breath, and natural somatic responses to guide pleasure.
25:06 - Superpower #3: Surrendering into the ecstasy of the moment
In ecstatic states it's undeniable that this universe is made of something bigger than yourself and that you contain that same magic and life force and so does everyone else. When people know that, they are not easily controlled or silenced.
34:18 - Superpower #4: Expand your capacity for intensity
It means being able to hold the full sensory vulnerability of being human and in relationship with other equally vulnerable humans.
44:00 - Superpower #5: Feeling Desire without abandoning yourself
Knowing/feeling what you desire and remaining fully open to the experience. Being a channel of presence inside your own body where the outcome of getting what you desire doesn't change your wholeness.