Episodes

  • Loving vs Fixing: The Fine Line That Breaks Relationships
    Jan 22 2026

    Do you find yourself constantly trying to help, coach, or fix your partner — and still feeling disconnected, resentful, or exhausted?In this powerful episode of the Together Podcast, Mike & Courtney explore the subtle but destructive line between loving someone and trying to fix them. While fixing often looks like care, support, or problem-solving, it frequently masks anxiety, control, and an avoidance of our own inner work — and it quietly erodes intimacy, polarity, and trust.

    Drawing from deeply personal stories from their past relationships and their current marriage, Mike & Courtney unpack the fixer–fixee dynamic, why it’s so common among helpers, coaches, and healers, and how it creates codependence rather than connection. They introduce practical frameworks like the sticky note theory, the Go First principle, and their sacred no-coaching rule — tools that help couples move out of resentment and back into true partnership.


    In this episode, you’ll learn:

    • Why fixing feels helpful but damages intimacy

    • The hidden anxiety underneath the fixer role

    • How fixing kills polarity and desire

    • The difference between reflection, vulnerability, and fixing

    • How to reclaim your own seat in relationship

    Chapters:

    00:00 Introduction to the Podcast

    01:07 The Fixer Dynamic in Relationships

    03:06 Personal Stories of Fixing

    07:10 Realizations and Shifts

    12:44 The Sticky Note Theory

    14:02 Mike's Experience with Fixing

    18:25 The Impact of Fixing on Relationships

    26:13 Personal Growth and Responsibility

    29:09 Discovering Self in Relationships

    30:30 Embodying Your Desires

    32:50 The Sacred We: A Partnership Approach

    33:57 The Mirror of Relationships

    35:53 Navigating Fixer Tendencies

    38:48 Setting Boundaries and Seeking Support

    41:54 The Power of Vulnerability

    44:19 Rules for Healthy Relationships

    46:30 Trusting the Process

    51:15 Final Thoughts and Call to Action


    🎁 Free Gift: Click here to grab your FREE Masculine & Feminine Essence resource https://www.sacredrelating.com/offers/tnF5MFbN/checkout

    🌱 Living The Sacred We Online Offer for Coupleshttps://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-we

    💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couples

    Work with Mikehttps://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coaching

    Work with Courtney https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth

    📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channelhttps://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast

    🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist

    💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlist

    Donation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏

    ⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠

    Email:

    ⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠

    ⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠

    Website:

    ⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠

    www.sacredrelaring.com

    www.courtneywren.com

    Instagram:

    @MikeElliott.Relating

    @courtneywren.sacredrelating

    MINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTS: https://mindfulmeds.io/Promo Code: TOGETHER

    THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠

    Promo Code: Together15

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    53 mins
  • Parenting the Nervous System: The Regulation Myth That May Surprise You
    Jan 19 2026
    If you’ve been trying to “calm” your child in the name of nervous system regulation, this episode may completely change how you parent.In today’s parenting culture, regulation is often mistaken for calmness — but true nervous system regulation has nothing to do with suppressing energy, emotions, or vitality. In this powerful solo episode, Courtney Wren unpacks the biggest myth in nervous-system–aware parenting and explains what real regulation actually looks like in children and parents.Drawing from her background in somatic therapy, trauma healing, and lived experience as a mother, Courtney explains how children naturally move through cycles of high energy, rest, emotion, and activation — and why labeling active children as “dysregulated” often reflects the parent’s nervous system, not the child’s. She introduces two core nervous system types (often misunderstood in parenting), explains how generational trauma shaped our ideas of “good behavior,” and offers practical tools for tracking regulation accurately.✨ In this episode:Why regulation does not equal calm Parenting the Nervous System Th…The difference between vitality and dysregulation Parenting the Nervous System Th…The two primary nervous system types in children Parenting the Nervous System Th…How parents project their own overwhelm onto kids Parenting the Nervous System Th…Why this generation of children has more life force Parenting the Nervous System Th…Practical bedtime tools that actually work Parenting the Nervous System Th…Chapters:00:00 Introduction to the Podcast00:59 Understanding the Nervous System01:30 Parenting with a Regulated Nervous System06:39 The Myth of Regulation Equals Calm08:59 Stages of Nervous System Healing10:43 Defining True Regulation15:49 Recognizing Dysregulation in Children20:22 Types of Nervous Systems: Hummingbirds and Whales24:53 Parenting Different Nervous System Types28:41 Recognizing Whale Children's Needs29:52 Engaging Whale Children31:46 Understanding Hummingbird Children35:30 Parenting Strategies for Different Children39:11 The Impact of Ancestral Trauma48:27 Bedtime Tips for Whale and Hummingbird Children🎁 Free Gift: Click here to grab your FREE Masculine & Feminine Essence resource https://www.sacredrelating.com/offers/tnF5MFbN/checkout🌱 Living The Sacred We Online Offer for Couples → https://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2 → https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couplesWork with Mike → https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coachingWork with Courtney → https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlistDonation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠Email:⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠Website:⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠www.sacredrelaring.comwww.courtneywren.comInstagram:@MikeElliott.Relating@courtneywren.sacredrelatingMINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTShttps://mindfulmeds.io/Promo Code: TOGETHERTHE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠Promo Code: Together15
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    55 mins
  • Our Story of Polarity: A Day in the Life Look at Embracing Masculine and Feminine Energies
    Jan 8 2026

    If you want more passion, polarity, and “juiciness” in your relationship, this episode is a real behind-the-scenes look at how masculine and feminine energies actually work in daily life.

    Many couples lose sexual charge not because something is “wrong,” but because their connection becomes neutralized over time. When the masculine and feminine poles aren’t consciously tended, relationships can start to feel stale, flat, or disconnected even when you’re doing all the “right” things.

    In this episode of the Together Podcast, Mike & Courtney unpack masculine essence and feminine essence (Shiva and Shakti), how to discover your authentic balance on the spectrum, and how to consciously choose polarity so intimacy stays alive.

    They share a personal story from their holiday season, how sickness and “mission mode” shifted their dynamic, and the exact moment they restored connection by flipping the polarity with presence, emotional truth, and nervous-system safety.


    In this episode:

    • What masculine & feminine energy really means (beyond gender)

    • How to find your authentic balance (not your coping strategy)

    • Why things get “stale” and how to bring the charge back

    • Shiva/Shakti, banks/river, bowl/water: simple metaphors that click

    • The #1 thing that kills polarity (and how to avoid it)

    📍 Chapters:

    00:00 Introduction to The Together Podcast

    00:51 Understanding Polarity: Masculine and Feminine Energies

    03:13 Personal Stories: Navigating Polarity in Daily Life

    07:31 Reconnecting Through Vulnerability

    22:43 Defining Masculine and Feminine Essence

    30:37 Creative Chaos in the Kitchen

    31:23 Understanding Masculine and Feminine Rhythms

    32:39 Exploring Gender and Essence

    36:07 Balancing Masculine and Feminine Energies

    40:05 Conscious Polarity in Relationships

    48:51 Practical Applications of Polarity

    54:52 The Number One Killer of Polarity

    57:11 Free Offer and Final Thoughts


    🎁 Free Gift: Click here to grab your FREE Masculine & Feminine Essence resource https://www.sacredrelating.com/offers/tnF5MFbN/checkout


    🌱 Living The Sacred We Online Offer for coupleshttps://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠

    💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couples

    Work with Mikehttps://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coaching

    Work with Courtney https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth

    📺 Subscribe to our YouTube Channelhttps://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast

    🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist

    💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlist


    Donation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏

    ⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠


    Email:

    ⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠

    ⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠


    Website:

    ⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠

    www.sacredrelaring.com

    www.courtneywren.com


    Instagram:

    @MikeElliott.Relating

    @courtneywren.sacredrelating


    MINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTS

    https://mindfulmeds.io/


    THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠

    Promo Code: Together15

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    1 hr and 1 min
  • Beyond the Ordinary: How Sacred Relationships Redefine Modern Love
    Jan 6 2026
    If you’ve outgrown conventional relationship advice and are craving a deeper, more conscious way of loving, this episode is for you.In a world that emphasizes hyper-independence, self-healing, and “doing your own work,” many couples feel confused about how to actually grow together. Sacred relationship offers a radically different paradigm—one where love becomes a living practice of mutual evolution, nervous system maturity, and devotion to the shared space between two people.In this foundational episode, Mike & Courtney explore how sacred relationship redefines modern love by moving beyond unconscious patterns, codependence myths, and purely individual growth. They share personal stories from their own marriage, the mentors who shaped their journey, and why thriving relationships require radical sovereignty AND deep togetherness.This conversation is an invitation into a more mature, embodied form of love—one that creates not just stability, but vitality, coherence, and real transformation for both partners.✨ In this episode:What sacred relationship actually is (and what it’s not)Why hyper-independence weakens intimacyThe difference between individual healing and relational masteryWhy couples need support from people living this workHow the “Sacred We” becomes a third, guiding intelligenceWhy relationship can be an accelerated path of awakeningChapters:00:00 Introduction and Welcome00:14 Defining Sacred Relationship01:42 The Journey of Self-Love and Togetherness04:13 Challenges and Growth in Relationships07:23 The Role of Therapists and Guides09:16 Personal Development vs. Relational Skills12:36 The Importance of Relational Support17:24 The We Space and Mutual Growth29:57 The Role of Adaptive Child in Relationships30:23 Understanding the Adaptive Child30:43 The Role of the Wise Adult32:31 The Power of Sacred Relationships35:17 The Importance of Supportive Circles39:45 Navigating Triggers and Growth43:18 The Impact of Sacred Relationship Coaching48:54 Reflecting on Your Support System50:02 Invitation to Sacred Relationship57:50 Final Thoughts and Encouragement🎁 Free Gift: Leave a 5-star review, screenshot it, and send it to https://www.sacredrelating.com/together-podcast-gift to receive our Guided Journal Practice: Coming Home to Clarity.🌱 Join the Together Community → https://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠ 💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2 → https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couplesWork with Mike → https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coachingWork with Courtney → https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlistDonation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠Email:⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠Website:⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠www.sacredrelaring.comwww.courtneywren.comInstagram:@MikeElliott.Relating@courtneywren.sacredrelatingMINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTShttps://mindfulmeds.io/THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠Promo Code: Together15
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    1 hr and 1 min
  • Frustrated with an avoidant partner who pulls away? Understand why and how to invite real connection
    Dec 24 2025
    Are you frustrated with an avoidant partner who pulls away just when you’re trying to connect?In this deeply personal solo episode, Courtney Wren explores avoidant attachment, emotional withdrawal, and why pushing for connection often creates more distance instead of intimacy. Many people in conscious relationships feel lonely, unseen, or blamed for “needing too much” when their partner shuts down — but what’s actually happening underneath avoidance is far more complex.Courtney unpacks how avoidant attachment forms through emotional neglect, why avoidant partners often feel “fine” while the relationship suffers, and how nervous system regulation plays a critical role in intimacy. She shares real stories from her relationship with Mike, practical examples of what not to do, and powerful ways to invite connection without overwhelming, shaming, or chasing your partner.This episode is especially for those asking:Why do I feel like I’m doing all the work?How do I stop pushing and still stay true to myself?Is it possible to heal avoidance together?✨ In this episode:Why avoidance isn’t a choice — and why it feels safer than connectionThe difference between healthy space and relational withdrawalHow shame blocks avoidant partners from knowing what they feelWhat actually invites an avoidant partner back into connectionHow to stop repeating childhood attachment wounds in adult loveWhy meeting avoidance with compassion creates real change🎁 Free Gift: Leave a 5-star review, screenshot it, and send it to https://www.sacredrelating.com/together-podcast-gift to receive our Guided Journal Practice: Coming Home to Clarity.🌱 Join the Together Community → https://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠ 💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2 → https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couplesWork with Mike → https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coachingWork with Courtney → https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlistDonation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠Email:⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠Website:⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠www.sacredrelaring.comwww.courtneywren.comInstagram:@MikeElliott.Relating@courtneywren.sacredrelatingMINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTShttps://mindfulmeds.io/THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠Promo Code: Together15
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    1 hr and 12 mins
  • Why So Many Women Are Exhausted And What They Actually Need
    Dec 12 2025
    Burnout, mental load, resentment, feminine essence, masculine presence—why so many women feel unseen (and how couples reconnect fast).There are so many women and mothers today who are wrung out—tired, irritable, overburdened, underappreciated, and quietly nearing the point of giving up. And there are so many partners who are trying, yet still feeling “never enough.”In this episode, I’m your brother and ally. I break down why women burn out, how the mental and emotional load silently stacks over time, and why so many couples get trapped in misattunement—loving each other in ways that don’t land.We cover:Why burnout + resentment builds (and what’s actually underneath it)The “mental load” problem and why it’s so invisibleThe myth of “masculine vs feminine” (and a clearer model of essence)What feminine essence needs to feel seen, met, and openWhat masculine essence needs to feel valued, trusted, and motivatedPractical ways to shift the dynamic so love finally landsChapters:00:00 – Why So Many Women Are Burnt Out06:45 – The Hidden Mental & Emotional Load Women Carry15:20 – When Men Are Trying but Still Missing the Mark22:40 – How Divorce Initiated Me Into This Work30:10 – The Myth of Masculine & Feminine Energy38:30 – Understanding Essence Beyond Gender50:15 – What Feminine Essence Actually Needs57:40 – Why Appreciation for Tasks Doesn’t Land1:06:20 – What Masculine Essence Needs to Thrive1:15:10 – How Polarity Restores Connection & Desire1:26:30 – Practical Tools to Meet Each Other Differently1:38:00 – Repair, Receivership & Moving Forward TogetherIf you’re a woman feeling unseen, this gives language to what’s been happening inside you.If you’re a man who wants to meet your woman better, this gives you a practical orientation and tools that change everything.If this hits home, share it with your partner and leave a 5-star review—this work deserves to reach more couples🎁 Free Gift: Leave a 5-star review, screenshot it, and send it to https://www.sacredrelating.com/together-podcast-gift to receive our Guided Journal Practice: Coming Home to Clarity.🌱 Join the Together Community → https://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠ 💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2 → https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couplesWork with Mike → https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coachingWork with Courtney → https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlistDonation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠Email:⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠Website:⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠www.sacredrelaring.comwww.courtneywren.comInstagram:@MikeElliott.Relating@courtneywren.sacredrelatingMINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTShttps://mindfulmeds.io/THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠Promo Code: Together15
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    54 mins
  • Conscious Cock: Soft, Slow, Sacred
    Dec 4 2025
    This is not a conversation about sex — it’s a conversation about awakening.In this episode, we sit down with Emily and Rob for one of the most honest, soul-rattling explorations of sexuality, shame, intimacy, and true erotic awakening.We uncover:What parasympathetic / yin sex really isHow to move from friction-based sex to regenerative lovemakingThe meaning of “conscious cock” and why soft penetration can create more pleasureWhy women feel numb — and how to reawaken the cervix, womb, and erotic systemHow men can dissolve shame, pressure, performance anxiety, and inherited porn conditioningHow to reconnect cock + heartHow betrayal can become an initiation into deeper intimacyWhy receiving is the hardest — and most transformative — practice for menHow couples can build a relationship where sex is emotional, spiritual, and deeply connectiveWhether you’re a man, woman, or couple, this episode will change the way you see intimacy forever.Chapters00:00 – Why Most Couples Never Reach True Intimacy06:15 – Conscious Cock: What It Really Means12:40 – Unconscious Taking vs. Sacred Penetration20:14 – Betrayal as the Sexual Initiation27:50 – Parasympathetic Sex: Soft, Slow, Sacred37:10 – The Masculine Initiation: Receiving Without Performing46:40 – Yin Sex, Heart Orgasms & Regenerative LovemakingFind Emily online: Website: http://www.maiden-medicine.com/Instagram: @maidenmedicine🎁 Free Gift: Leave a 5-star review, screenshot it, and send it to https://www.sacredrelating.com/together-podcast-gift to receive our Guided Journal Practice: Coming Home to Clarity.🌱 Join the Together Community → https://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠ 💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2 → https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couplesWork with Mike → https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coachingWork with Courtney → https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlistDonation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠Email:⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠Website:⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠www.sacredrelaring.comwww.courtneywren.comInstagram:@MikeElliott.Relating@courtneywren.sacredrelatingMINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTShttps://mindfulmeds.io/THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠Promo Code: Together15
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    1 hr and 14 mins
  • How to Know When to Leave Your Relationship
    Nov 29 2025
    If you’ve been feeling confused, disconnected, or stuck in the “should I stay or should I go?” loop, this is one of the most important relationship episodes you’ll ever hear. Millions of people search for clarity around leaving a relationship because unresolved uncertainty creates emotional distress, nervous system dysregulation, and a chronic sense of instability in the bond. In conscious partnership, clarity, commitment, emotional safety, and direction are essential for healthy attachment, secure love, and real connection.In this powerful episode, Mike & Courtney guide you through the psychology behind feeling half-in/half-out, why this state quietly destroys relationships, how to identify deal-breakers, and how to know whether your partnership is meant to evolve or dissolve. They also share deeply personal stories about their past relationships, trauma patterns, attachment wounds, and what mature love looks like when clarity finally arrives.🌿 In this episode, you’ll learn:Why “one foot in, one foot out” is emotionally and physically damagingThe difference between discomfort and real deal-breakersHow to find clarity when you’re terrified of choosingWhy honesty (with self and partner) is the key to maturityWhat sacred devotion looks like—even when the relationship must endHow to exit with love instead of drama🎁 Free Gift: Leave a 5-star review, screenshot it, and send it to https://www.sacredrelating.com/together-podcast-gift to receive our Guided Journal Practice: Coming Home to Clarity.🌱 Join the Together Community → https://www.sacredrelating.com/⁠ 💛 Work with Mike & Courtney 2:2 → https://www.sacredrelating.com/sacred-relating-couplesWork with Mike → https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/coachingWork with Courtney → https://www.courtneywren.com/rebirth📺Subscribe to our YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@thetogetherpodcast🏹Join the Initiated Man Waitlist→ https://www.itsmikeelliott.com/initiated-man-waitlist💎 Join the Waitlist for The Holy Mama Membership →https://www.courtneywren.com/holymamawaitlistDonation link 👇🙏🏼❤️🌏⁠https://www.paypal.com/donate/?hosted_button_id=VWHABJWZ749X4⁠Email:⁠⁠transform@itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠⁠relating@courtneywren.com⁠Website:⁠⁠www.itsmikeelliott.com⁠⁠www.sacredrelaring.comwww.courtneywren.comInstagram:@MikeElliott.Relating@courtneywren.sacredrelatingMINDFULMEDS MUSHROOM PRODUCTShttps://mindfulmeds.io/THE SKIN DEEP CARDS: ⁠https://shop.theskindeep.com/collections/all⁠Promo Code: Together15
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    58 mins