NO GOOD DEED GOES UNPUNISHED, FAM! What happens when you open your home FOR FREE to a person in need? Well, sometimes they turn out to be a racist and violent garbage person WHO SCREAMS AT YOUR GRANDKID. And then sometimes they move across the street where they set their sights on making your life a living hell. AND SOIMETIMES THIS ALL ENDS IN MURDER. Ugh. I need a drink. Do your stretches before this one, Fam, it's gonna make you real, real mad.

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OK, look, we love the bayou. Like, we LOVE IT. The accents, the trees, THE FREAKING GOTHIC VIBES. But what we don't love is the murder. Especially this one. On August 23, 1987, a young mother named Selonia Reed was found murdered in her car about a mile from her home. The clues were few, but there was one that was significant. A cigarette butt. In the pre-DNA 1980s, there wasn't much they could do with it. But, shockingly, it was well preserved. And though it would take THIRTY FIVE YEARS to get it done, that cigarette butt would eventually lead investigators to Selonia's killer. That's...too long. But here we are. And now let's spend some time with Selonia's friends and family--including her impeccably dressed sister--to hear about how amazing she was.

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Fam, let us ask you a question: Would you ever, say, give up your home, your job, your friends and family to move to move to Minnesota and live in a house where you sleep on the floor in sleeping bags and work FOR FREE for 18 hours a day? Yes? Yes you would? THEN DO WE HAVE THE CULT FOR YOU!!! Ugh, here we go again: sleep deprivation, free labor, AND AN INSUFFERABLE LEADER WHOSE BODY IS CONSTANTLY BEING TAKEN OVER BY SPIRITUAL ENTITIES FROM THOUSANDS OF YEARS AGO. And the names. THE FREAKING NAMES, FAM! Tick Tock It's...ugh, weeeeee can't even with this one. BUCKLE UP!

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