Episodes

  • Episode 9 (Part Two): “Luck of the Irish,” “86,” “Out of the Frying Pan and into the Fire” and more!

    Episode 9 (Part Two): “Luck of the Irish,” “86,” “Out of the Frying Pan and into the Fire” and more!
    Dec 15 2023



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    48 mins
  • Episode 9 (Part One): “At Sixes and Sevens,” “Skin of One’s Teeth,” “Baker’s Dozen” and more!

    Episode 9 (Part One): “At Sixes and Sevens,” “Skin of One’s Teeth,” “Baker’s Dozen” and more!
    Nov 22 2023



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    56 mins
  • Episode 9: "Duck Club" Update, Mementos of a Dead Ex-Boyfriend, New Partner for an Old Vibrator, ChatGPT Love Advice — and much more!

    Episode 9: "Duck Club" Update, Mementos of a Dead Ex-Boyfriend, New Partner for an Old Vibrator, ChatGPT Love Advice — and much more!
    May 29 2023

    Malcolm and Kurt share a shocking follow-up to last episode’s workplace sex club letter, as well as advice regarding letters from:

    • A man whose girlfriend is not willing to part with her deceased ex-boyfriend’s memento box
    • A woman whose husband is the object of frequent flirting from their younger female coworker
    • A daughter who reconnected with an abusive father on his deathbed — but then he survived!
    • A man who wants to know if he can introduce his new girlfriend to his late wife’s vibrator

    Plus our new idea for an “astral” advice column, classic Dear Abby letters, and thoughts on love from ChatGPT.



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    57 mins
  • Episode 8: “Clean Your Clock,” “Jury-Rigged,” “To Whale On,” “Makeshift,” “Slapdash,” “Freebird!” and more!

    Episode 8: “Clean Your Clock,” “Jury-Rigged,” “To Whale On,” “Makeshift,” “Slapdash,” “Freebird!” and more!
    Mar 27 2023

    Malcolm and Kurt demonstrate (mostly) mild annoyance with each other while puzzling over the provenance of common phrases suggested by fans of the podcast for beating on someone and doing slipshod work. All that and discussing whether there’s anything more annoying than yelling out “Play Freebird!” to a band at a live music performance.



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    57 mins
  • Episode 8: A boss uncovers an office sex club, cutting ties with dead husband’s clingy family, angling for a cut of deceased drug dealer brother’s cash — and much more!

    Episode 8: A boss uncovers an office sex club, cutting ties with dead husband’s clingy family, angling for a cut of deceased drug dealer brother’s cash — and much more!
    Jan 26 2023

    In this episode Kurt and Malcolm offer our not-remotely expert takes on:

    - How a widow can tell her annoying former sister-in-law “Barbara” that their “relationship” is over
    - Legal options for a woman who wants her portion of the $240,000 left in deceased brother’s dresser drawer
    - What a manager should do after discovering a wide-ranging COMPETITIVE sex club operating right under her nose
    - A wealthy man concerned about continuing a relationship with his comparatively impoverished girlfriend



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    50 mins
  • Episode 7: “Slush Fund,” “Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread,” “Flat Out Like a Lizard Drinking,” “Footloose,” “Molson Muscle” and more!

    Episode 7: “Slush Fund,” “Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread,” “Flat Out Like a Lizard Drinking,” “Footloose,” “Molson Muscle” and more!
    Dec 3 2022

    Malcolm and Kurt trade barbs and witticisms while puzzling out the derivations of common English phrases while also celebrating the 30-year anniversary of an amazing word-related hoax perpetrated by a member of Generation X against the mighty New York Times.



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    53 mins
  • Episode 7: Introducing boyfriend to polyamory, dealing with a copycat “friend,” staying friends with an ex, getting hassled for parking in the handicapped spot — and much more!

    Episode 7: Introducing boyfriend to polyamory, dealing with a copycat “friend,” staying friends with an ex, getting hassled for parking in the handicapped spot — and much more!
    Sep 20 2022

    In this episode Kurt and Malcolm offer our expert takes on:

    • How a woman in a committed relationship (and a small child) can talk her boyfriend into pursuing polyamory
    • The best way for dealing with a Facebook friend who copycats to such an extent we fear she’s looking to commit murder and take her friend’s place
    • A writer with chronic pain who has to field critical comments from strangers over handicapped parking and unsympathetic friends
    • A woman whose long ago ex-boyfriend and current friend insists on describing her as his ex to his new lady friends
    • A writer who is just so damned good at helping others that she’s become the go-to source of advice for far too many friends


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    57 mins
  • Episode 6: “Makin’ Whoopie,” “Copycat,” “Shag,” “Kit ’n’ Kaboodle,” “Pussyfoot” and the granddaddy of them all, “F*ck”

    Episode 6: “Makin’ Whoopie,” “Copycat,” “Shag,” “Kit ’n’ Kaboodle,” “Pussyfoot” and the granddaddy of them all, “F*ck”
    Aug 12 2022

    Malcolm and Kurt trade witticisms while making their best guesses about the derivations for three synonyms of “doing it,” as well as a trio of (vaguely) feline-themed expressions.



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    56 mins