Showing results for "Monster" in Humorous

I'm the new owner of a magical mansion. This mansion, well, it's not your typical building. It's a dungeon from another world, masquerading as just another private residence in the suburbs. It has enchanted rooms, can craft powerful items, build lethal traps, and produce incredible monsters. And it's my mission to protect and evolve its monstrous inhabitants.

What could possibly be the most infuriating thing to a vampire disgusted by the internet? A twenty-six-year-old social media influencer who just ran out on her cheating ex-fiancé and insists on staying in Vlad's quiet castle. But he needs money to repair his ancestral home, and Aubrey needs a place to lick her wounds after getting her heart broken. He is ready to have humans invading his space. He is not, however, ready for her.

All that stands between rowdy long-haul trucker Jill MacLeod (aka Junkmouth) and her family back in Boston is two thousand miles of asphalt. Well, that and the monstrous game the System has had her playing ever since it descended on Earth. The reward: mana. Jill's goal: kill, score, drive—and stay alive. Behind the wheel of a turreted forty-ton semi named Bertha, Jill hammers east from Montana through a gauntlet of every kind of chomping, hissing, rabid creature imaginable. Barreling forward in her magical soulbound big rig and chalking up a bumper crop of roadkill, Jill isn't alone for long.

I make a living out of screwing over the jerks who capture and torment supernatural beasties. But when I free a bunch of particularly powerful monsters from their cages, I'm not counting on them following me home like lost puppies. Stunningly hot lost puppies, but still. These manly monsters are determined to repay me for my help, and they won't get out of my apartment until they're satisfied we're even.

Three delinquent monsters with fearsome powers. One girl made of pure sunshine. Can she save this team of misfits? My past? Let's just pretend it never happened. All I want is to spread enough joy to make up for the pain I've caused. So it'd be nice if my unexplainable powers would stop going haywire. When I start blitzing my fellow monsters as well as mortals, the authorities of the supernatural world give me a final chance to avoid banishment.

A princess with a mostly useless magical talent takes on horrible monsters, a dozen identical masked heroes, and a talking lion in a quest to save a kingdom—and herself—in this feminist fairy tale satire. “The Princess Bride meets Shrek.”—Susie Dumond, author of Bed and Breakup...

Trillin isn't technically a person. She's a tiny breakaway piece of consciousness from the all-devouring Endless, doomed to eventually rejoin it. But when a human witch stumbles into her world, Trillin suddenly has a new reason to figure out individuality—one shape-shifting tentacle at a time.

Here's the thing about dating dragons: don't. Especially if you're me. My first dragon boyfriend, Zed? Gorgeous, charming... and responsible for the worst night of my teenage life. The ones who came after? All ghosted me when they found their fated mates. I learned my lesson: No more dragons. It never ends well. Fast-forward fifteen years, and guess who strolls back into my life? Zed—older, hotter, and still single. He only wants one date, but he's overdue to find his mate. I should walk away before he disappears a second time.

Sean and Gel have only just begun to whet their appetite for revenge. With their former master, the necromancer Bancroft, now more desperate than ever to recapture them, the eternal hunger of undeath raising the hourly mana costs for Sean's survival ever-higher, and naught but desert for miles around, it's time to start upping their game.

Sean wasn't expecting to die today. He definitely wasn't expecting to be dragged off to another world or raised as a skeleton infused with Death itself. Yet here he is, tossed down a Necromancer's trash chute, and left to fend for himself against otherworldly monsters. Only as an abandoned minion, Sean no longer has a summoner paying the hourly mana costs he needs to sustain his new form. Which is bad since if he can't pay those himself, he's going to die… again.

Ryker Hayes is a licensed massage therapist, and a damn good one at that. It's a career he's passionate about, and all his plans for life are on track—until he winds up transported to the world of Werifesteria in the body of an infamous warlord, at least. Now all he really wants to do is forget the misdeeds of his alter ego and retire to a life of anonymity with a couple interesting women as his new partners. Together, they open the very first massage inn and spa in all the land, and take on all the responsibilities that come with it. Turns out, it's a lot of work!

Squire Yorick and his Magical Sword Justice have been summoned to Kultai where a magical conjunction has gone off the rails. A Monster Army is threatening to wipe out the planet, and only a Magical Sword Knight can save them. Yorick must level up and learn new skills to confront this threat using the might of his magical sword. But is that all there is? Hidden on Kultai are the remnants of an ancient war and an ancient foe is rising back up to reclaim their lost power.

Neue Fälle für Daniel Becker, den Anwalt, dem die Monster vertrauen. Monsteranwalt Daniel Becker muss nicht nur einen kiffenden Jungdrachen, der sich unversehens in Seattles Zoo wiedergefunden hat, zur Freiheit verhelfen. Er soll auch einen pummeligen Liebesgott davor bewahren, zurück nach Italien abgeschoben zu werden. Doch plötzlich findet sich Daniel selbst als Angeklagter vor Gericht wieder. Zu seinem Glück – oder Unglück? – erhält Daniel unerwartet Unterstützung von einem Vampir.

For Renee “Nay” Favreau, food is life. She’s the owner of a Los Angeles taco truck who dreams of becoming a respected chef and expanding her fleet, and whose greatest enemy is an unhappy food critic. Always hunting for her next great dish, the search eventually leads her to a near-fatal encounter with an interdimensional spider. Awaking in a strange world where words appear before her eyes, a talking tentacle befriends her, and people are trying to kill her, Nay learns she has the ability to become an Epicurist.

As a monster, Shrubley is forbidden from joining the adventurers guild. In a world where essence artists rank up in power and most monsters are feral beasts, Shrubley is among the weakest of creatures and is treated as an outcast. With curiosity essence bound to his spirit, Shrubley might be weak, but he's intelligent and determined. Against all the odds, he discovers a loophole from the Druid that gave him life—but there's a deadly catch. For a chance of ever being accepted as a true adventurer, he must challenge an otherworldly realm threatening to consume everything.

"Plötzlich Hexer. Was tun, wenn du plötzlich Dinge siehst, die nicht real sein dürften? Der schaurig-schöne Auftakt zur neuen Urban Fantasy Serie von Kirsten Storm." Lock und seine Freunde lassen sich von einer Hexe die Zukunft voraussagen. Doch kaum ergreift die alte Frau Locks Hand, um darin zu lesen, stirbt sie an einem Herzinfarkt. Dabei überträgt sie ihre Kräfte auf ihn. Plötzlich sieht er Dinge, die es nicht geben dürfte. Bei seinem Job als Pfleger beobachtet er fassungslos, wie eine rauchgraue Kreatur über dem Bett der rüstigen Frau Jenks schwebt und ihr die Seele aussaugt.

Shrubley, the Hero Adventurer, has vanquished the serpentii threat. Everything he ever wanted is within his twiggy grasp: fame, fortune, adoration, and the love of the people who had once shunned him for being a monster. But Shrubley is an adventurer at heart. Along with his monstrous friends, Cal, Slyrox, and Smudge, Shrubley embarks on a long journey to the fabled monster city of Pandaemonium. Guided by Countess Haalften, Shrubley seeks to master his Sage Knight essence healing powers even as vampyrs, monsters, and bandits ambush the party along the way.

Joining the elite jewelry enchanter's guild is all I've ever wanted...but nothing I create sparkles enough for them. After my latest rejection, I'm starting to think I'll never be good enough, no matter how perfectly I enchant an emerald. Without their approval or a coven, though, my business is sure to go under.

I've made a life of catering to any craving a friend might have—and now I have a magical pastry shop that does exactly that. Creating enchanted desserts at Pixie's Perch is my lifelong dream, and as much as I love my friends in the Wild Oak Woods, something's missing. Until the fierce warrior orc Ga'Rek shows up with his crew of Unseelie fae. He's never seen anything like my pastry shop, and I've never met anyone like him. When he starts helping out in my kitchen, he heats up more than the oven. He's got a real knack for filling eclairs with cream, too.

Ein unfreiwilliges Abenteuer, ein verfluchter Zauber – und zwei Rivalen, die vielleicht mehr gemeinsam haben, als sie dachten … Leovander Loveage hat sich auf die kleinen Magien spezialisiert: eine Melodie, die Schmetterlinge herbeiruft, ein Fingerschnippen, das Haare pink färbt – harmlose, charmante Zauber, die ihm zwar wenig Respekt einbringen, dafür aber kaum schiefgehen. Denn eines hat Leo über die Jahre gelernt: Große Magie führt nur zu großem Chaos. Doch genau so ein Chaos passiert ihm nun – und das ausgerechnet mit seinem grummeligen Rivalen Sebastian Grimm.