Episodes

  • How to Talk to a Defensive Partner Without Starting a Fight

    How to Talk to a Defensive Partner Without Starting a Fight
    May 7 2026
    A message from Dr. Tracy’s community landed hard: “I’ve stopped bringing things up. Every time I do, my husband gets defensive… and now I feel like a stranger in my own home.” This episode names what so many couples quietly live with: defensiveness doesn’t just derail a conversation, it slowly erodes safety, connection, and the willingness to keep trying. When one partner experiences feedback as an attack, self-protection takes over fast, sharp, automatic, and the other partner eventually stops reaching.Dr. Tracy and Greg break down what defensiveness actually is (a nervous system response, not a personality trait), why it can be so hard to interrupt, and how it often links back to old patterns around shame, repair, and emotional safety. They share simple ways to change the pattern from both sides: how to approach a defensive partner without “upping the ante,” and how to build one sentence that helps you pause, stay curious, and protect the bond instead of protecting your ego. 📎 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Is your partner defensive? Download my FREE scripts to respond to a defensive partner. Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you.. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    41 mins
  • How to Prevent a Mother’s Day Fight in Your Relationship

    How to Prevent a Mother’s Day Fight in Your Relationship
    May 3 2026
    Mother’s Day isn’t just about the day. It’s about what the day reveals: who gets prioritized, who gets protected, and who ends up feeling invisible. Dr. Tracy speaks to the painful pattern so many mothers name every year, he celebrates his mother, but doesn’t celebrate his partner, and then the same cycle repeats: she feels unseen, she gets angry, he gets defensive, and the family falls back into old roles that leave the couple feeling farther apart.She offers a different path forward: start by naming who your “we” is and checking in with each other first, release the expectation that one partner should carry both families (especially when kin-keeping has become a heavy, invisible job), and get clear on what would actually feel honoring this year. The goal isn’t perfection or a big production. It’s recognition, relief, and a plan that reduces decision fatigue, so Mother’s Day becomes a moment of connection instead of another loyalty test. 📎 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you. Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    13 mins
  • Why Play Works When Kids Won’t Listen with Dr. Kim Van Dusen

    Why Play Works When Kids Won’t Listen with Dr. Kim Van Dusen
    Apr 30 2026
    A long day, a bedtime standoff, and a split-second pivot into “spy crawl” mode becomes the doorway into a bigger truth: connection often returns the moment play enters the room. Dr. Tracy sits down with Dr. Kim Van Dusen (The Parentologist) to unpack why play isn’t just “being silly,” it’s a nervous system tool and a relational skill that lowers power struggles and rebuilds cooperation in real time.Dr. Kim explains how her approach combines play therapy, solution-focused therapy, and positive behavior supports to create more calm, more communication, and more connection, without swinging into harsh punishment or permissive chaos. They talk about why kids connect through play (not logic), how adults lose access to playfulness as they move into productivity mode, and why a playful shift can regulate both parent and child faster than threats, bribes, or lectures. The takeaway lands clearly: play doesn’t require more energy than you have, it often gives it back, and when safety and trust are present, play becomes one of the most effective ways to lead with limits while staying connected. 📎 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Order Dr. Kim's new book: Parenting Through Play HERE Find out more about Kim's work HERE 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you. Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    36 mins
  • How to Stop Taking In-Law Priorities Personally

    How to Stop Taking In-Law Priorities Personally
    Apr 26 2026
    A mother-in-law writes in with a hard, honest truth: she loves her daughter-in-law, she’s tried to be warm and welcoming, and she’s still grieving that her son’s wife’s family seems to get the “real” holidays while his side feels like the cordial box-check. Dr. Tracy validates the sadness without turning the daughter-in-law into the villain, and offers a reframe that changes the whole lens: when your child marries, they don’t add a person into your family as much as they leave and build their own. That shift isn’t rejection. It’s the reality of a new family system forming.From there, she holds two truths at once: you don’t get to decide how your son and daughter-in-law prioritize extended family, and you’re still allowed to grieve the relationship you hoped for. The path forward isn’t comparison or silent withdrawal, it’s depersonalizing what you don’t control, dropping the “his side vs her side” scorekeeping, and focusing on what’s possible to co-create now. Dr. Tracy encourages naming desires directly (without pressure), staying relational instead of shutting down, and watching for confirmation bias, the mental habit that only collects evidence that you’re not a priority, even when connection is being offered in other ways. 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you. Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    15 mins
  • Why So Many People Feel Lonely in Their Marriage

    Why So Many People Feel Lonely in Their Marriage
    Apr 23 2026
    Loneliness isn’t just a risk factor for people who live alone anymore. Dr. Tracy and Greg unpack the reality of relational loneliness, the experience of feeling alone inside a long-term partnership, even when you share a home, kids, a schedule, and a couch. Sparked by a striking poll from Dr. Tracy’s community, they name the paradox many couples live inside: you chose partnership hoping you’d never feel lonely again…and then modern marriage delivers a kind of loneliness you didn’t see coming.They explore how this drift happens quietly: missed bids for connection, conversations that shrink into logistics, and the way phones can become a constant, convenient escape hatch that slowly starves emotional intimacy. The point isn’t to blame your partner, it’s to label what’s happening so you can do something about it. Small, consistent rituals (even 10–20 minutes without screens) matter more than grand date nights, especially for parents without built-in support. And if your partner tells you they feel lonely, the invitation is to treat it as a privilege and a warning light, not a personal attack, because naming it early is often what prevents the quiet divorce later. 📎 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Feel closer in under 10 minutes per day.⁠ ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you. Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    37 mins
  • Justin Bieber, Coachella, and the Power of Meeting Your Younger Self

    Justin Bieber, Coachella, and the Power of Meeting Your Younger Self
    Apr 19 2026
    Did you catch Justin Bieber at Coachella? When he sang alongside footage of his 13-year-old self, it wasn't just nostalgia — it was a public, vulnerable act of inner child healing. In this short episode, Dr. Tracy Dalgleish unpacks why that moment landed so hard and what it teaches us about our own healing work. Tracy explores: Why meeting your younger self is powerful healing work How we quietly learn to abandon ourselves growing up Why we meet our struggles with criticism instead of compassion Why Tracy believes adulthood doesn't truly begin until 28 or 29 Why inner child work is never "done" — and why that's the point A gentle invitation to approach your younger self the way Justin approached his on that stage — with a quiet "I see you. I'm here." 📎 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Check out this episode: Is That Really You…or Your Inner Child 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you. Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    10 mins
  • How Couples Get Stuck in the Same Cycle

    How Couples Get Stuck in the Same Cycle
    Apr 16 2026
    Some couples don’t get stuck because they don’t love each other, they get stuck because their nervous systems keep pulling them into the same protective dance. Dr. Tracy and Greg unpack their own cycle in real time: avoidance and “giving space” on one side, protest and pursuit on the other, and how quickly it can turn into defensiveness, shutdown, and disconnection. The shift isn’t about “better communication” as much as recognizing what’s happening underneath the words, the body cues, the old stories, and the threat response that takes over when the person in front of you matters most.They also name the part that changes everything: it’s not you vs. your partner, it’s both of you vs. the cycle. When you can externalize the pattern, pause it (“we’re doing the thing”), and come back to repair instead of disappearing, the intensity starts to drop. Small moves matter: naming what’s happening, making eye contact, asking directly for what you need (even something as simple as a hug), and returning after a timeout so the conversation doesn’t become another abandonment wound. 📎 MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE Be Connected — 24/7 relationship support, including Dr. Tracy AI trained on Tracy's clinical work. Get real answers in the moment, even when your partner won't do the work with you. 🔗 WANT TO GO DEEPER? One spot left for a couples intensive with Dr. Tracy — a 2-day deep dive designed for couples who are stuck and not seeing results from weekly therapy. In-person or she travels to you. Read the book: ⁠⁠⁠You, Your Husband, and His Mother⁠⁠⁠ Not sure where to start? Find your relationship's negative cycle — free quiz here. Ready to deepen your connection?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Download my 100 Questions⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Want your questions answered on the show?⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Submit them here!⁠⁠⁠ Build better connection and feel close starting today. ⁠⁠Join the⁠ ⁠⁠30 Days to Us Challenge⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 📲 FOLLOW DR. TRACY Subscribe to You Tube Follow on Instagram ⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠Follow on Facebook ⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    29 mins
  • Honest Motherhood with Libby Ward: Losing Yourself and Finding Your Way Back

    Honest Motherhood with Libby Ward: Losing Yourself and Finding Your Way Back
    Apr 9 2026
    Resentment doesn’t always show up as anger. Sometimes it shows up as a quiet question you can’t stop hearing: does anyone see how hard I’m trying? Dr. Tracy sits down with Libby Ward, creator and author of Honest Motherhood: On Losing My Mind and Finding Myself, to name the tension so many mothers live inside, deep love alongside deep exhaustion, gratitude alongside grief, connection alongside loneliness.Libby shares how her turning point wasn’t just “being honest online,” it was being honest with herself first: admitting the load was heavy, the system wasn’t sustainable, and the guilt narrative wasn’t telling the truth. Together, they unpack how mental load becomes invisible, how “all you had to do was ask” becomes its own kind of loneliness, and why real change often begins when someone finally owns the full scope of a task from start to finish. The takeaway lands clearly: you’re not a bad mom for struggling, you’re a human in a role that asks for too much, too often, too quietly, and honesty is where the first real shift begins. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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    43 mins